BL/TDS Self-Harm Support: Thread 4

I have posted in this thread before. Just decided to pop by this thread again - haven't done any kind of significant self harm in recent times though and really don't want to at this point.
What I did see, is at least a couple of people wanting to do this kind of thing, like cutting. I'm just going to give a bit of info on something I have found that works similarly well and does no real damage.

For me, there are two reasons I self harm: #1 Feeling the pain makes my mood better. #2 I self harm because I want to damage my body or shorten my lifespan (or in some cases, I do more dangerous things just to see if I'll die - that has not happened in a long time.

If you are wanting to do it to improve your mood, here is my advice - It is quite likely that the improved mood is in part due to a release of endorphins. Perhaps it also makes you feel better by distracting you from your emotional state. In either case, this can be accomplished in less destructive ways. I would recommend just chewing a raw habanero pepper. This did not initially seem to me like something worth trying, but it is what I chose to do the last time I felt like that and it actually worked just as good as burning with cigarettes and soldering irons. If you just want to feel the physical sensation to improve your mood, this is a better way to go about doing it for several reasons:

1. It has the same physiological(minus the tissue damage) and neurochemical type of effects as cutting or burning
2. It is generally completely safe *this may not apply if you have a heart condition, there are rare cases of heart attack induced by hot peppers
3. No scars are left behind - no trace of what you did

I used to put huge amounts of hot peppers in my food. I'd have tears running down my face the whole time I was eating. Everybody wondered why the hell I did that and I really didn't get the connection between the burning mouth and the resulting mood lift for a long time. My mom and brother would make jokes about me being a wetback or part wetback (that is their language, not mine). Perhaps that would be worth a try instead of cutting or burning?

I did most of my burning where nobody would see it, but then I started burning my arms and hands. I did not care when I was doing it but was embarrassed later, especially when people asked about them - nobody has asked in a long time now, and I am glad of that. It took at least two years for them to get light enough that people weren't paying any attention to them and they have faded more since then. It did take a long time though - if you are anything like me, you will not like other people seeing that. Opting for hot peppers will allow you to avoid that problem. Hope someone finds that suggestion useful.

If you just want too cause damage to yourself, then I guess that probably won't work - not quite sure what to tell you if that is your only reason for what you want to do.
 
^The pepper is really good idea that I haven't thought of before. Thanks for sharing TD. <3 I like hearing about the different ways people get through thoughts of self- harm. I still get the feelings from time to time so it's valuable to me and I think others in our little community that might be struggling with this as well.
 
I've been dealing with thoughts of self harm for a while now. What helped me before to keep from cutting was the "rubber band snapping"- but what do you all think? Is that just replacing one form with another? :\
 
It is certainly better than cutting (holding ice cubes in your hand and trying to crush them or writing on your arms help in this way too), but something that might be even better than self-injuring is keeping a journal about your feelings, exercising, or simply talking out your feelings when they're happening.
 
There is a thread in SLR where people write letters that they will never send--they could be letters about love, frustration, whatever. It can be a huge release sometimes and I hope writing all that out was one for you. If a relationship feels one-sided there are three possibilities: either the person is truly too needy and self-centered to actually be a partner or you yourself expect too much from another person or the third possibility--a mixture of both. If you truly give and give without getting emotional support in return then you need to get out of that relationship--at least until the person grows up a bit. If she is using a lot, this may not be able to happen. In the end, self harming and self destruction are our own actions and we have got to claim them. People can frustrate us, hurt us, even abuse us but what we do with the experience comes down to us. I hope you can find your way out of this relationship before you turn back to self-harming. Have you thought about ending it?
 
I hope you can find your way out of this relationship before you turn back to self-harming.

Way to late for "before" :(

Hence the post in here. It was a bit ranty aimed at someone, but still in theme with this thread... I've blood on my hands; quite literally.
 
Yeah, I thought about that when I wrote it. I guess what i meant was before it becomes more habitual. Is this a relationship you feel can be saved?
 
i have an unhealthy fascination with blood the way it look feels taste uh my i salivating so anyway sometimes i cut my wrists to feel see taste the blood i spent a month in a psychward and met this chick there that was just like me on this so we'd cut our selves and drink it and paint each other with it anyway i don't know how to stop cutting i don't want to give up on blood but i also don't want to rob a blood bank idk maybe i'm just weird sick a little twisted
 
i have an unhealthy fascination with blood the way it look feels taste uh my i salivating so anyway sometimes i cut my wrists to feel see taste the blood i spent a month in a psychward and met this chick there that was just like me on this so we'd cut our selves and drink it and paint each other with it anyway i don't know how to stop cutting i don't want to give up on blood but i also don't want to rob a blood bank idk maybe i'm just weird sick a little twisted

Drinking blood is not the healthiest thing. Especially drinking another person's blood...there can be tons of blood bourne illnesses you can get.

Have you talked with your counselor about this fascination?

When I would cut, I found relief and enjoyed SEEING the blood, but I personally have never drank it nor have I had any desire whatsoever to.
 
yeah i talked to therapist about it once and got sent to the psych ward and i'm not talking about drinking a lot of blood maybe 3 table spoons i also like to have sex with women on there periods i'm as safe as one possibly could be when it comes to drinking blood or using it as a kinky sex aid
 
So is it more of like a sexual fetish?

I'm just trying to understand and learn because it's something I've personally never heard of before.
 
I like the taste, smell, and feel of blood. I've never used it in a sexual way at all, but I have cut myself in the past sometimes simply to be able to taste and smell my own blood.
 
so i guess no one can relate to the sexual use of blood but can relate to the intrigue of blood

I google a couple things on blood fetishism (not appropriate to post here), and found some intriguing info. I'm not sure if you have done that yet, but if you do, you'll get some interesting, factual articles. %)
 
Seriously, eat some green chilies. They're seven times as high in vitamin C than an orange: http://www.chilly.in/chili_benefits.htm
Plus the burning sensation really does give you that 'feeling' you want from your normal method of self harming.

Honestly it really helps me in times of stress.

Hope everyone else is doing okay. :)
 
My anxiety, depression, & emotional withdrawal issuing me feel so terrible.

I had an awful panic attack in the work bathroom today where I was literally crying locked in a stall. Then self injury came to mind & I craved doing that so strongly.
 
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