ibis: yeh they said after a month or wen we find my stable dose , il get the takeaways , maybe certain clinics do it diff ways , my guy said one takeaway a week after first month , then 2 a week the next month , and so on
i see one of the docs u mentioned at the start of this thread, ur right , he is real good n easy to talk to , good bloke , i mentioned im on zannies too n hes like " man that shit should be banned throw em out " i prety much agree with him on that one considering the hecktic-ness of the first seizure or whateva the fuck happened to me , felt like a bad bad bad trip mixed with a k hole 10000x stronger than any k hole iv experienced . pretty scary lookn in the mirror and seeeing the back of ur head pulsating :s but fuck throwin em out and w/d
with all the stress n bs i got goin on atm it takes me 10mg to mellow me , doesnt affect my co-ordination , it took me 12mg (not inc my 2 daily 6mg doses) just to get to sleep last nite, my tolerances to both must be fuckd , if sumone with no tolerance took 1/2 of what im scripted a day theyd die i rekn , but its not like i knock bak 12mg all the time , just 2 tabs 3 times a day , last nite i was just pissed off as fuck n was either doin sum really stupid n end the pain for good , or just munch em down n hope i wake up in the morning over the problem, wich i am
im on 85mg now, not sure wich type it is , its sorta orangey yellow colour, i think 100mg will be where i stop at wich im gettin scripted later on in the week wen my current one runs out. Goin up 5mg a week or so over the next 3 weeks .
Becoz 85mg stil has me on the fone tryin to get pills (oxy, morphine) even talkin bout it now is makin me think bout it , might go for a drive to the footy club carpark n paint the concrete with hot rubber , good natural rush that one too , if u got enuff power under ya right foot anyway lol
my doc says u dont get tolerant to methadone, but i think thats bullshit , goin by exp , whats ur thoughts on that ?
Also i hear ppl sayin methadone gets u fucked up , like the usual opiate fucked up . iv neva get that , only takes my mind off it for the first few days after a up my dose , then i start to get tempted to score pills again
i dont really like hammer , shootin it got me too fucked up to enjoy , and smokin/snortin just costs me too dam much to get to that "just right" spot
but i told everyone to deny me sales, and deleted the numbers of the ppl whod eventually sell em to me if i hassled them enuff so no point trying,
been tempted to eat a heap of bricks n roll the dude for a heap but id feel bad , it aint my style , n plus if he got fucked on by the guy above him ( well known nutter/dealer from north subs ) thatd make me partly responsible, hes the last person id want after me , i like my fingers n toes were they are .
so iv prety much cut myself off from the bad influences ,
but now all the decent people i know who are clean-ish, theyr just the drinkin type , cpl puffs of a joint or theyll maybe take a pill once a month or two , not in the drug scene , think of me as a junky , anyone who calls me a junky gets a nice floggin, iv had to smash 2 of my best mates because theyve said it to me , both times i gave em a warning too , n they said it again , so cant say they didnt deserve it , i didnt want to do it ,im not a fighter at heart unless i have a reason to then thats totally diff situation n for me thats a green light to cut sick until they cant stand or my hands the size of a football, but im not the type to say sumfin n not go thru with it then look like a dick/weak/shittalker wannabe toughman like 3/4 of the people out there .
but with the good comes the bad , i started smokin ice again pretty reg the last 2 weeks, well regularly for me , just weekend warrior styles , not everyday thing .
mad product for sick price and when its sittin in front of me i just cant say no.. also started goin bubble again a few times, only go bubble for a fat rockin sesh n mainly to see some old good mates whov been on a iron bar holiday since i was 19
I lost 4kgs just from sweating from dancin n the heat inside the club 2 weekends ago , most times i go there straight edge , maybe a zanny to take the edge off the hektikness of the city these days n just a beer or 2 , then just drink water to keep the drys away
n its fukd coz the ppl i been smokin with , were meant to be to ppl i started hangin with to get myself out of the scene coz i thought wen they moved out near where my new place is they werent rockin the crackys n juice no more, then i get bak from work cpl weeks go n theyd just gota quarter of prety fucking dam good quality shards and a litre of squirt (ghb for the confused)
tho i do enjoy the juice wen im just on that fun level of juiced , like 3/4 the way to blowing out ..
aparently im the funniest person on earth according to other ppl wen im real juicy lol but i dont do it in public coz im prone to blowin out, blew out satday from 5ml over 4 hrs, fukn pricks drew dicks all over my face n didnt tell me at all, i didnt notice until the taxi driver started pissin himself laughn as soon as i jumped in , though i wlda done the same thing , thats what ya get for passin out , its the rules lol
but the 8balls gone n theyr havin a break so that forces me to stop again thank god , i thought shit was gona go downhill again for a second
even tho i been sayin im on the road to clean , k still holds its place in my heart and always will , thats next weekends adventure , got a q between 3 of us, gona be sick in this place i been livin at too , rail up a monster line , kick back on the lazyboy on the balcony with mad view of dandy mountains
p.s checkout new ZOO magazine, Amanda Hinchcliffe, omfg , id do anythn in the world to have her , actually shed be 2nd choice actually , the other not worth mentioning on here coz basically fuckall of u wld have no clue who im talkin bout. ah well
p.p.s CARN ZE FARKEN PIESSSSS , had a good convo wth the chick who gives me my dose about it this mornin , shes pies supporter too , i even got the missin teeth to match lol not for long , bookd in in a fortnite for a full reco lol got one of them 4grand worth of dental work form thingys from the gov , finally my bong n ciggi stained bottled cracked busted ass bling bling teeth will be no more woooo