Captain.Heroin
Bluelight Crew
123 days
Hi again guys. Hope you are well.
I've been on an upswing. Have not Iv'd anything in months now, and have used less than 4 mg of dilaudid orally this month so doing well on that end.
I switched doctors and I really like him and for some reason he makes me want to be healthy. I see him often outside the office, so it makes me want to try harder I guess. He wants me off all controlled substances and wants me to wean off my ambien.... Which scares me. Ambien helped me kick the narcotics. He's recommending trazodone, but I wanted to do more research. He's ordering my ambien for now, but wants me to switch soon. Anyone do well on another med for sleep even with a drug tolerance?
@Mocmoc,
(1) When I'm having a craving I try to remind myself that the craving is going to pass regardless of wether or not I use, it isn't going to last forever and the more times you hold strong and don't give in the easier it will get to overcome them.
(2) Likewise, the more times you give in to the craving the stronger they will become and the more difficult it will be to resist the urge.
(3) If you're having a craving, it's been my experience that the worst thing to do is nothing. To just sit and be in your head while you're craving is dangerous, most times in the past that I have relapsed are times when I had a craving and allowed myself to be alone and think about whether or not to use. Often once I started considering using or not, I didn't know it but had already decided I was gonna do it. So nowadays, if I have a craving I immediately try to either find someone to talk to like one of my roommates or a friend, and if talking to another person isn't an option for whatever reason then I find something to occupy my mind be it homework, reading, a good movie, video games, working out/running, etc.
^^ I very much appreciated that post as well. @CaseFace, you have very clear messages! Thanks for helping!! This thread is reminding me of what it was like to be sober, working a program and helping others through our own experiences and how important it is to be a part of a group that is working towards the same goal. Thank you to everyone on this board!
Three days in the can!
I've been off them for a while. Cumming is but a tiny part of what I wish to convey, but since you mentioned it: sometimes I do, sometimes I don't.^^ Don't come? In my experience it's incredibly difficult to last any substantial length of time when fresh off opiates. Everybodys body is different though.