💀 The Abyss 💀 (Open 24hrs)

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Captain.Heroin said:
maybe I always had the open love style hippie thing and judeochristian society sucks and has been making me think that is all anybody wants.

I WILL DIE YOUNG of a drug overdose. But maybe I'll get to old age so not really "young" but eternally young at spirit. GROWN UPS ARE YUCKY
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GROWN UPS are yucky!
so true Captain.

We shall remain forever young at heart!
 
dear MALania

do you know that feel when you have to go to clinics further away because you don't want to run into anyone you know

and then you're like yaa what if they doin the same

fuck

FUCK

lol

small world

oh god and I have no shame.... it's gonna suck

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

ripping an invisible band aid off nothing REJECT REALITY staying young forever
 
Captain.Heroin said:
PO i have a problem I need to go to the clinic and am abstaining from benzos I like absolutely cannot deal
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Are you in benzo withdrawal?
You NEED to get some benzo’s if that is the case.

There is no abstaining from benzo’s. Trust me, I recently tried that and it did not go well!
We can only taper those down very, very slowly.

Otherwise we will loose our fucking shit!
so get to the clinic!
 
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Holy fuck, I don’t even know how you can make 300 posts and keep up on pm’s by the time I make one post Captain!

YOU NEED BENZO’s!!!
 
are you in benzo withdrawal
no but you tell me. No cravings/desire. I have one anxiolytic and one hypnotic. I burnt through a bottle of hypnotics rather quickly trying to ragequit a relationship in 2019.
how many days has it been
I don't know. I'm not counting but it is well over a week. The container just sits here, inches from my hand. Taunting me. It knows her and I know I. The death of every moment is so beautiful because you can make the next one better. I don't need to dull pain. I have none. I am nothing.
how did you go from equivalent of 6+mg of alprazolam a day to 1mg alprazolam per day for just two days and stop and not care
I cannot say because it involved 6 more drugs and sleep deprivation and sex and was super unhealthy and I am not even ASShamed of my junkie behavior in this binge, but I should be and know better than to detail it in full.
 
Painful One said:
Holy fuck, I don’t even know how you can make 300 posts and keep up on pm’s by the time I make one post Captain!

YOU NEED BENZO’s!!!
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Can confirm. I wound up in the mental ward after self-d/c'ing benzos and suboxone. It was actually kind of fun though being on the opposite end of that equation for a spell though.
 
SKL said:
Can confirm. I wound up in the mental ward after self-d/c'ing benzos and suboxone. It was actually kind of fun though being on the opposite end of that equation for a spell though.
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why did you go manic or psycho or both

i just get a little manic and have known this any time I jump off benzos abruptly

and I do not care no cravings

I've only gone through a Mild-like rebound of symptoms once.

Other than this rebound insomnia

but I started getting sleep normally the last 2 days

the first was on a hard wood floor after 2 days awake and sex and drugs
 
PAINFUL ONE I won't I'm too manic and it's pure overdrive

I was hiding it quite well by deleting/merging posts but I can't even

how about this

if I see more tits in inbox I'll crack a beer or two and then it'll even me out, I know this 100% for sure promise
 
Captain.Heroin said:
why did you go manic or psycho or both

i just get a little manic and have known this any time I jump off benzos abruptly
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Didn't sleep for near a week. Became manic and extremely paranoid with frank delusions. It went away fairly quickly after I got a haldol/ativan shot and slept for like 18 hours. Then I needed Thorazine to sleep for the next month or so. But I'm off benzos now hopefully for good and just take remeron and vistaril at night and gabapentin sometimes for anxiety.

ngl you sound a little manic nao
 
Captain.Heroin said:
I have been in a hospital bed SCREAMING for an ativan shot and knew they thought I was on meth = blood work = no drugs hence why I kept berating them every word until I got the ativan shot
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they should have given you the ativan shot. with a haldol chaser, but still.
 
When I was in the psych ward they did pay rather too much attention to my impressive substance abuse history and too little to my psychosocial circumstances tbh
 
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