Sustanon as you know I combine benzo's with opiates on atleast a weekly basis, although the opiate is more often than not just codeine it is occassionally heroin, morphine or codeine. It is definately NOT a SAFE combination, but an experienced user can certainly combine these two classes of drugs in conservative doses without too much fear of OD'ing.
In saying that, it is clear that a HUGE number of opioid related deaths also involve the use of benzodiazepines and often alcohol as well. The truth is that it is a fucking bad habit to get into, and opioids become a lot less satisfying on their own when you get used to the added sedation of benzo's. I have always been a big fan of poly drug use (This is neither a condonement or encouragement of such behaviour, just stating a fact) but the truth is you dig yourself a deeper hole. Everytime you improve your high or find a way to get it to exceed the last, going back is never as satisfying, and it also creates a dangerous mindset where you are always aiming to get higher instead of just being satisfied with what the one drug on its own did in the first place, or at a quarter the fucking dose. It gets pretty bad to think back and say shit, 2 years ago I would consider pretty much the minimal dose of sedatives it takes me to achieve any truly satisfying high or "nod" beyond ridiculous and ad I attempted such a dose would probably have landed me in hospital.
The point I am trying to make is polydrug use feels fucking good, but you are playing with fire and just the mentality one has going into poly drug use is generally unhealthy. Think back to your first experiences with your favourite drugs and how fucking magical they were, we really shouldn't have to be combining several times the reccomended dose of like 10 different drugs just to get a good effect.
I am an advocate of personal freedom, and people should be able to chase such a high if they wants. But in my experience, mixing drugs like that will just bring you greater problems and emptier pockets quicker.
For the record sustanon, I know you don't need to hear this shit. Just been having a bit of a think lately and thought I would put that out there. I have been accused of being too pro drugs by a lot of people and maybe in some ways I am. But I would definately say to all the up and comers out there try and enjoy your drugs seperately and as infrequently as possible. They are fun as hell but there does come a time where one has to pay a pretty heavy price for all the fun they have had.
Puckboy, I have been told from multiple sources a psychiatrist is my best bet of finding someone actually willing to put me on a constant dose that is reasonable for relieving anxiety in someone with a tolerance to benzodiazepines. The problem is I cannot afford to see a psychiatrist. On one hand I would genuinely like to uncover the "root cause" of my anxiety, but I am not entirely convinced it is something I could overcome entirely without medication. I have been anxious as long as I remember and only made things worse through abusing marijuana and stimulants from a very young age (12 onwards). There have been numerous things that have happened in the last 5-10 years that have really fucked my self confidence, but these issues have been present since childhood and if I am honest, it would be hard to of asked for a better upbringing until just after I started to abuse drugs. Due to that, I feel like I am just naturally anxious, and there is nothing wrong with being slightly medicated to compensate for that.
I don't just expect benzodiazepines to fix all my problems or am just looking for a buzz or whatever (although I do admit I occassionally use them recreationally, it is seldom these days I would take a benzodiazepine for an effect I would term "recreational" with the exception of using them for the purpose of opioid potentiation) and I would ideally like to work on my problems in more than one way. But even supposing pharmacotherapy was the only solution I was after, I don't see what is so wrong with that, it just shits me to tears as a legal adult I don't have final say in my own fucking medical treatment. As I said, I don't ONLY want tablets, but as an adult even if I did I should be able to make an informed decision to do so without intervention from some quack. We live in a society that is looking for a quick fix to everything, they don't have a problem with me being a drug addict, so long as its SSRI's and beta blockers I get hooked on, but as soon as we are talking anything that ends in 'pam or 'lam suddenly the addictive nature of the substance is an issue and thats fucking bullshit.
I think it is fair enough to have to consult a doctor about your medical treatment, but when my fucking appointments are paying his fucking mortgage he should be listening to me too, it isn't or atleast should not be a one way street. I think it is fair to make me talk to a doctor about possible anxiety treatments, but at the end of the day as an adult it should be my personal decision. As I stated in my previous post, probably my biggest issue with the whole system is the more informed you are the more you get treated like shit, how is that right? I know heaps of older folks who have been put on benzo's and didn't even know what they were, as soon as I demonstrate any knowledge on the subject I am automatically branded a junkie. The funny thing is I KNOW just from talking to them that my knowledge of benzodiazepines off the top of my head far outmatches theirs, it is ME who would have to live with the consequences of taking them long term, and yet it is still his final say? Something is fucking wrong there IMO when I am pretty well versed on the subject of benzo's but the only way to have a hope in hell of getting one is by playing dumb as dog shit...
There are some out there that do care more about your mental health than the dollars in their pocket but they're few and far between.