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Self-harm support thread v. 3

^ Well done!

Try to make it 4 days... then 5... then 6... then a whole week! :)
 
Sweet P said:
^ Well done!

Try to make it 4 days... then 5... then 6... then a whole week! :)
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im really hoping thats what will happen!

good luck to you too. what youre going through sounds really rough. i unfortunately dont have any advice for you other than respect yourself. i hope you get better!
 
RedRum OG said:
no cutting in 3 days yayyy
longest ive gone since i started
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That's excellent to hear man. Now you know you can be strong and resist the urges to cut, keep it up <3


billyswifey that is so good that you've decided to get help hun, let us know how it goes <3
 
Sweet P i know what its like to have different forms of self harming apart from cutting/burning whatever. smoking is one of my ways of self harm without the immediate effects/scars etc, and knowing that each cigarette is harmful makes it that much better.

any amount of paracetamol over 4 grams is considered an overdose and very toxic on your liver so be careful. it sounds like you need to seek some help for these sorts of feelings that would drive you to these actions because youre right, theyre a form of suicide even though they may not kill you straight away.

the long term permanent damage may feel like something you want right now, but imagine down the road when you have something to live for, and instead you have to spend days in hospital, or with a permanent physical impairment? i know these thoughts are hard to formulate in your head when youre going into a low patch. its good to hear that seeing a counsellor helps your mood.

please continue to seek some help. pm me if you need to. take care of yourself hun
 
^ it starts that way. Really, whatever it takes to get you into recovery. Although it is better to START for yourself. You will soon see that the reason you keep it up, is for you.


still no self- abuse! :D Actually since I kinda have to take better care of myself for other reasons...I'm trying to in general. Perhaps I'll scale back on the negative stuff in general.
 
Sweet P said:
Back to self-harming again, which seems to be getting normal for me. I'm taking at least 5 grams of paracetamol a day, plus alcohol, plus shitloads of benzos, plus opiates. Hoping to seriously fuck myself up. I've realised that cutting only leaves superficial wounds - I want permanent long-term damage.
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I've been where you are. Where you don't really give a damn. You have sunk so low that you might has well help throw the dirt in yourself. I can understand the self medication with the benzos and opiates. But permanent damage is not good and you know that. What would the people that love you say? I am not the only one to say this, it's time to get some serious help. If you are going to appointments, you need to be open and honest about what you are doing or find a new dr. I know you said you had one coming up next month. Can we maybe just put the APAP away until then?
 
^ I'm open with my doctor, and I've told my drug counsellor about what I've been doing with the paracetamol/codeine tablets. But there's not much she can do. If I was holding a knife to my throat and threatening to kill myself, they could put me into hospital. But since I'm not currently "acutely suicidal" I don't think they have the power to intervene.
 
Sweet P said:
^ I'm open with my doctor, and I've told my drug counsellor about what I've been doing with the paracetamol/codeine tablets. But there's not much she can do. If I was holding a knife to my throat and threatening to kill myself, they could put me into hospital. But since I'm not currently "acutely suicidal" I don't think they have the power to intervene.
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Please knock it off with the paracetamol Sweet P :( . Depression and feeling just generally miserable isint permanent and there is a good chance that you will feel better soon. It could be weeks, months or years but bad feelings never last.

So please hangin there and knock it off with the paracetamol before you cause permanent damage to your liver with that fucking poison. If your taking the OTC APAP with codeine pills please do a CWE on them it's not like it's hard to do and i know youve done it lot's of times. Even if your taking the prescription ones if your going over 3000mg's of APAP a day regularly doing a CWE is worth it.

Ive had the fuckit syndrome many times in the past when ive been depressed and im sure it's come close to costing me my life. Plus i totally neglet my health in other ways such as not eating, not getting any vitamines, not taking my psych meds on time or sometimes at all even though i have to take them everyday and other dumb shit like that. Now ive learned to deal with my bipolar disorder is alot healthier ways and more constructive ways. Even the peoplen that are really close to me have noticed a big difference in me since the beggining of the summer.

All im saying is i was once the most miserable bastard you could ever run into and i had no hope whatsoever. I wasent living i was surviving and i was barely doing that sometimes. If i can get better no doubt you can too and i have faith in you. You just have to find something that is worth living for even if it's just for yourself which is actually a very important reason.

I just realized i havent self harmed since june :) . Thats the longest ive gone in about 5 or 6 years. Im pretty damn proud of myself for that :D
 
^^ Great post PA <3
And congrats for going that long without self-harming! That is excellent :)
 
I've been considering putting myself in a self check-in mental ward, to get over the cutting & maybe fix my head. Just worried that I'm going to go in & then start using it as a hiding spot when shit gets tough. Has anyone in aussie (preferably melbourne) done this before?

I've been feeling pretty good, a little depressed but no feelings of self harm.
 
^^ Hun have you considered going to a regular counsellor/psychologist first, and seeing how that goes? For, say, weekly sessions? You can get a referral to a psychologist from your GP.
That is so great you've not been having the urges to self harm <3
 
I thought about cutting the other night, while I was out walking in the snow at 3am. But I immediately said NO...BAD boy. I'm now battling the old me...a little shaken up cause today is the 2yr anniversary of my gma's death.
 
^^ Sorry to hear that Ody :(
How long had it been for you between cutting?

And, happy birthday :) <3

billyswifey said:
I've thought about it... I just don't know if it's really going to help too much. I have far too much going on in my head, I'm fucked up. I'll try counselling first. If that fails I'll check myself in.
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Ultimately it's up to you hun. But in my experience if you get a good psychologist who connects with you well, they can help you through most anything. I know the feeling of being "too fucked in the head" as well, and I made it back. You're never too far from help <3
 
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