Self-harm support thread v. 3

[Captain.Heroin]

I am so sorry to hear that you have experienced that degree of trauma TINK. You can always PM me if you want to talk about it.

 

[TINK]

Thanks guys... actually it was very odd. Just realizing that's what I was doing. I am ok about it. Funny how no matter how much you think you know about yourself and what you have been through you c=still learn more and more. It just explains a lot.

 

[infamousryan]

hi I dont cut myself but when i was 12 years old i was burned (using a blunt) into a gang. Now i have 2 burn marks on my hand since i was 12 years old. any idea how to make them go away? i went to a dermatologist and she said theres nothing she can do.

but theres gotta be something eh?

 

[theartofwar]

^ no dice man, I had the same treatment w the end of a pistol heated n pressed up leaving the double circles. That shit is there for life. If you find anyway to get it off PLEASEEE tell me bro.

 

[Pillthrill]

The desire to self harm is creeping back in on me. I have even been trained on this stuff but it doesn't seem to help me deal with the desire to self-injure. I can keep telling my brain no but I'm afraid at some point I'm going to lose. Really I'm so covered in scars these days that already fill be with shame, whats a few more, or so my brain says.

 

[n3ophy7e]

^^ You've just gotta keep trying your best to resist it hun. You KNOW you can. Keep distracting yourself, keep busy so it's out of your mind. I think most if not all self-harmers have recurring thoughts of doing it, but we also have the strength to continue to say no.

hi I dont cut myself but when i was 12 years old i was burned (using a blunt) into a gang. Now i have 2 burn marks on my hand since i was 12 years old. any idea how to make them go away? i went to a dermatologist and she said theres nothing she can do.

but theres gotta be something eh?

I have gotten really good results on a burn scar on my ankle using Bio-Oil, 3 times a day for 3 months. My burn was only 12 months old, and it was a rather deep burn, and now it is pretty much invisible.

The dermatologist who told you there is nothing you can do needs to be re-trained in her profession 8) That is bullshit, quite frankly.

Try the Bio-Oil, there are other similar products on the market too but if you go to your drugstore and ask for Bio-Oil they will know what you're talking about. Just make sure you persist with applying it 3 times a day, for at least 3 months. Good luck!

 

[Ds]

i'm really teetertottering on the blade, i havn't cut in almost 9 months. (mostly because i'm around so much people that I don't want people to see the cuts, or see me this way).
now i really don't give a fuck, and i really want to get high. I don't do drugs anymore so this is something that has crossed my mind, and now is really sticking out.

here's whats been going on.

i've got the money, got the job, got the video games, got nice shit. but i'm not happy. ever since i had my kidney stone, my lifes gone spiraling out of controll. i wear that "face" when i'm out in public around here, and when i go back to my room, all the fucking emotional, and mental feelings come out.
now all those feelings have built up and i really want to take away the pain.
i'm realllllyyyy unhappy, like really unhappy where i am at today, i've had 4 friends within the past month that overdosed, or commited suicide, and just watching the way their friends and family react to their facebook puts me in fucking tears.
it has me thinking like "if i happened to passaway, will my family and friends have good things to say about me, or will it be negative".
i can't deal with the acceptance that my friends are lost, i know they are gone. but i cant grasp it yet. espically the ones i know personally, the kids i grew up with and bang'd dope with for the first times.
now they are gone.

the past week i really havn't gotten out of my bed, besides to shower, and eat. i really do not get out much at all. there was some drama about me here calling the ceo of this halfwayhouse telling him i'm going to rehab or some bullshit. now everyone here thinks i relapsed, and when ever i show my face i get some rude comment, or some "sarcastic" shit. i dont think the people that are doing it knows that it's really hurting me. like reallyy fuckin with my head.

i've tried to pray, but i have no idea who i'm praying to, or if i'm even praying to the right person. or what am i doing praying in the first place.

ugh im not in a good mood mentally,. on the physical side, i'm wearing a plastic mask that is smiling, but on the inside i'm ruined.

 

[OverDone]

Hey man, sometimes we get in this spot of 'stillness' that is confusing. Its like we are well prepared to move on to our purpose but we don't know what that purpose is as of yet. So we sit. Stuck with ourselves once again. This time though, we have a better understanding of that 'self' we're stuck with and it ain't all that bad.

There are going to be more of these lonely, empty, days filled with negative focus on ourselves but the thing is... there are going to be even more enriched, fulfilling days full of positivity and purpose coming as well. Life has its ebbs and flows so we gotta roll with it and push on.

D's fuck those other people. YOU know you. You are the only one who is the expert on who D's is and what D's has done. The more shit a person can talk about someone else, the more opportunity that shit talker has to avoid looking at themselves. Basically, they are running from themselves by putting the focus on you.

Just keep it movin', man. Do the next right thing for the next right reason and try not to over think or over analyze. Purpose will make itself known in its own time (not yours)

I have much love and much respect for ya, brother. Tomorrow is another day but who's to say you can't start thius one all over again.

Essentially... in three words... Fuck.The.Haters.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Much to everyone.

 

[TINK]

The desire to self harm is creeping back in on me. I have even been trained on this stuff but it doesn't seem to help me deal with the desire to self-injure. I can keep telling my brain no but I'm afraid at some point I'm going to lose. Really I'm so covered in scars these days that already fill be with shame, whats a few more, or so my brain says.

If you need someone to talk to let me know..... PM me. Sometimes it just takes getting those thoughts out of your head to someone who understands. consider me your personal life coach that you can call to cheer you through the rough times.

And that offer goes to anyone who needs help! I know what it is like to have no one to talk to who understands where you have been and where you can go and how scary it is.

 

[mutzy]

The one thing that used to be able to stop me harming was fear that someone would see and ask what they were (Most of the cuts are on my legs so when they see em it's not my scars they're focused on!).
I used to have an on/off love interest who knew about it and I stopped for a good while so that I wouldn't have to admit that I cut again to him. Not the best reason in the world to have stopped but it was better than nothing.

I'm sorta back in doing it again but very tentatively. My current housemate (and close friend, he's a psych nursing student) spotted some of the older ones mentioned it to me at the time but I don't want him seeing any more.

Currently in the process of working up the courage to tell the new bf what my scars are really from (I sincerely doubt he believes the excuses I gave him) and I'm trying to work up the courage to tell him when we're both completely sober too.

 

[panic in paradise]

^this will be a good day im sure
either way you are being honest with your self first and fore most.

The desire to self harm is creeping back in on me. I have even been trained on this stuff but it doesn't seem to help me deal with the desire to self-injure. I can keep telling my brain no but I'm afraid at some point I'm going to lose. Really I'm so covered in scars these days that already fill be with shame, whats a few more, or so my brain says.

how has it been PT??

 

[rangrz]

^ no dice man, I had the same treatment w the end of a pistol heated n pressed up leaving the double circles. That shit is there for life. If you find anyway to get it off PLEASEEE tell me bro.

Bullshit. At the minimum, you could technically make a new, different (non symbolic) scar over top with a skin graph...granted finding a surgeon to do a pointless (medically) surgical procedure may be hard.
You can try oils and what not. You can try lasers, not ablation/serious burns, but the cosmetic type used to reduce pigmentation, to make the scar lighter and less noticeable.
You may be able tattoo over it and cover with something that is positive to you, instead of negative.

 

[paranoid android]

Bullshit. At the minimum, you could technically make a new, different (non symbolic) scar over top with a skin graph...granted finding a surgeon to do a pointless (medically) surgical procedure may be hard.
You can try oils and what not. You can try lasers, not ablation/serious burns, but the cosmetic type used to reduce pigmentation, to make the scar lighter and less noticeable.
You may be able tattoo over it and cover with something that is positive to you, instead of negative.

Ya i have a rather noticeable scar from a bic lighter on my arm and the only time i'm conscious of it is when a doc looks at it. I'm sure the ones that don't know me are thinking nut job when all it was was something i did during a sorta mixed state during a bad IV coke comedown.

If i ever get a tat there fine but i'm not going out of my way to hide any scars as they are a part of who i am.

 

[Asclepius]

Dont cut myself anymore but still embarassed about scar's when in public. Am dealing, fuck em are always a reminder that things didnt run smooth! love BL

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Bullshit. At the minimum, you could technically make a new, different (non symbolic) scar over top with a skin graph...granted finding a surgeon to do a pointless (medically) surgical procedure may be hard.
You can try oils and what not. You can try lasers, not ablation/serious burns, but the cosmetic type used to reduce pigmentation, to make the scar lighter and less noticeable.
You may be able tattoo over it and cover with something that is positive to you, instead of negative.

That's great advice rangrz.

If i ever get a tat there fine but i'm not going out of my way to hide any scars as they are a part of who i am.

Scarring from IVing drugs is not something I'm proud of, so I am totally OK with using some triple antibiotic ointment.

This is mostly because to keep IVing effectively, you don't want scarred skin tissue for your next injection site. It's just not good to keep building up more and more scar tissue in the same area.

 

[BanginMyLifeAway]

^^ yea i have some scars from IV'n ..not proud either but hey what can u do .

and i never been a cutter but my girl is well was i helped her pass that i mean she still has urges and what not but id like to think i helped her alot with that

if anybody ever needs somebody to talk to about anythign involving cutting feel free to PM me if im online i dont mind trying to help or just talk... i know alota people look down on that i despise them
people like with my girl she had people stop talking to her and even past BFs who left her when they found out ...and thats when she really needed somebody ..so if im here then im here i dont totally know but i know i wish the best to everybody struggling

 

[Captain.Heroin]

^^ yea i have some scars from IV'n ..not proud either but hey what can u do .

and i never been a cutter but my girl is well was i helped her pass that i mean she still has urges and what not but id like to think i helped her alot with that

if anybody ever needs somebody to talk to about anythign involving cutting feel free to PM me if im online i dont mind trying to help or just talk... i know alota people look down on that i despise them
people like with my girl she had people stop talking to her and even past BFs who left her when they found out ...and thats when she really needed somebody ..so if im here then im here i dont totally know but i know i wish the best to everybody struggling

That's really great you could help her with that.

You can use a light layer of triple antibiotic ointment (neosporin) on scars once per day to help them heal - and they will heal quicker this way.

 

[BanginMyLifeAway]

i got a old tube of half used maderma somewhere that stuff helped lighten my tracks the ones on my arms is gone but i got some on one of my hands and it bothers me

yea im glad i helped her with it she was doin it alot and its been 5 years since shes done it she had thoughts of it afew times but i talked her outta it