What the...?! Why??
-
The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
Posting Rules Bluelight Rules Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines Bereavement Mindfulness Suicide Support Anger Management -
TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android
Venting The Vent/Rant Thread Vs. You Silly KnuckleHeads Can Go Fly a Kite!!
- Thread starter neversickanymore
- Start date
Jabberwocky
Frumious Bandersnatch
Today in the morning he woke me up super early to say sorry an he said something about him sleepwalking, but i just told him to fuck off, really.
Last edited by a moderator:
That sucks so much man
Eligiu
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2017
- Messages
- 1,428
I asked my property manager if I could get a cat as an emotional support animal (which are recognised in legislation here, just not on the same level as service animals in terms of access to public facilities). She said I just needed landlord approval and I'd be good to go. Then another property manager told me that no, I need to pay for the landlord's of the whole strata to attend a meeting (which they never all do anyway) to approve me having a pet.
FFS it isn't a 'pet' it's a different category. That's why the legislation exists. So that people like me who could really benefit from having an animal live with them can get around the 'no pets' policies in most of my state. I mean it's not like I'm asking for a huge or yappy dog. I'm just wanting a quiet, little cat. And I know how to take care of cats as I had them the whole time I was growing up so it's not like it won't be well cared for. My GP was super supportive of writing the letter I needed for proving it's going to be an emotional support animal, he thinks it's a fantastic idea for me to get more motivated to take better care of myself to take care of the cat.
I wish this was simpler. And I wish my fucking property manager would contact me sooner rather than later so that we can at least organise the meeting if we have to ASAP instead of waiting even longer.
FFS it isn't a 'pet' it's a different category. That's why the legislation exists. So that people like me who could really benefit from having an animal live with them can get around the 'no pets' policies in most of my state. I mean it's not like I'm asking for a huge or yappy dog. I'm just wanting a quiet, little cat. And I know how to take care of cats as I had them the whole time I was growing up so it's not like it won't be well cared for. My GP was super supportive of writing the letter I needed for proving it's going to be an emotional support animal, he thinks it's a fantastic idea for me to get more motivated to take better care of myself to take care of the cat.
I wish this was simpler. And I wish my fucking property manager would contact me sooner rather than later so that we can at least organise the meeting if we have to ASAP instead of waiting even longer.
Ds
Bluelight Crew
Today I changed phone providers, and my number.
The last thing I had told someone close to me was I was changing my number, that was after them wishing me well and they hit me with that 'L' word again, and the only thing I could say was 'I'm changing my number'. It's almost like, I like to experience being left alone, regardless if it's close friends or family. I haven't seen anyone close to me in over a year now, and even then it was a super quick hello, lunch, drop me the fuck off, type of deal.
I don't mean or try to come off as a dick. I'm starting to worry about this because I really don't want to be alone, just left alone, and I'll do whatever it takes in order for this to happen. Even if it takes me ruining a relationship (I'll tell myself 'fuck them), and years later, I'll call home from a random payphone, or use my burner phone app, and select a Wyoming area code.
When I was high on meth or heroin, I'd talk to family and friends all the time, and now that I'm sober, I feel as my brain chemistry is shifting towards Isolation, and once in 'isolation', I feel content and even comfortable. I don't get that from being with people.
Sometimes, I try not to question my motives, and the thing that hurt's the most and is yet so satisfying is being in a 'fuck it' attitude and mentality. :/
The last thing I had told someone close to me was I was changing my number, that was after them wishing me well and they hit me with that 'L' word again, and the only thing I could say was 'I'm changing my number'. It's almost like, I like to experience being left alone, regardless if it's close friends or family. I haven't seen anyone close to me in over a year now, and even then it was a super quick hello, lunch, drop me the fuck off, type of deal.
I don't mean or try to come off as a dick. I'm starting to worry about this because I really don't want to be alone, just left alone, and I'll do whatever it takes in order for this to happen. Even if it takes me ruining a relationship (I'll tell myself 'fuck them), and years later, I'll call home from a random payphone, or use my burner phone app, and select a Wyoming area code.
When I was high on meth or heroin, I'd talk to family and friends all the time, and now that I'm sober, I feel as my brain chemistry is shifting towards Isolation, and once in 'isolation', I feel content and even comfortable. I don't get that from being with people.
Sometimes, I try not to question my motives, and the thing that hurt's the most and is yet so satisfying is being in a 'fuck it' attitude and mentality. :/
Mjäll
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2008
- Messages
- 4,068
I just want to send a thought to everyone who is in more bad luck than me. You must be super champs still glowing inside after all the abuse and damage.
It's not about what could have been, it is about what always is.
I realize my dependence on the lack of even worse circumstances (mine are mainly mental and manageable) and i admire those who can handle more adversity.
Not sure what to make of it.
It's not about what could have been, it is about what always is.
I realize my dependence on the lack of even worse circumstances (mine are mainly mental and manageable) and i admire those who can handle more adversity.
Not sure what to make of it.
Ds
Bluelight Crew
I'm currently at a back woods KY library because my job likes to give me a 1 day deadline , once eligible for benifits. I had to contact 2x HR staff and had to contact cooperate because who the fuck owns a computer in east-bootah'fuck Kentucky?
So here I am, then I'll be driving to the job site & lets fucking get it, Saturday, 2022.
So here I am, then I'll be driving to the job site & lets fucking get it, Saturday, 2022.
Fucking up already on my day off.. to golf.. nope it’s to go the damn dentist.. the an appointment at the oral surgeon.. what a way to spend today.
At least I have a massage after this shit.
At least I have a massage after this shit.
Ds
Bluelight Crew
So my hands are starting to shake in the AM. I'm assuming it's because of the lack of alcohol. It's not a good shake, like i have a nervous disposition or something.
I don't like this feeling, and i want to drink. And here it is 7am.
I don't like this feeling, and i want to drink. And here it is 7am.
Nightmares last night.. Was good to dream and remember it.. but it was one of those nightmares where you are trying to get somewhere important and everything is preventing you.. its super confusing so your always lost.. there is a never ending set of barriers and technical problems.. always tripping and getting snagged. Things and people endlessly preventing your progress.. it was beat.
JoeTheStoner
Bluelighter
man i'm so thankful for modern medicine and treatment for erectile dysfunction . what a time to be alive....
i wonder if they would take like some wild concoctions back in the day or did t hey just go to the apothecary and like ask for like cocaine good sir
i wonder if they would take like some wild concoctions back in the day or did t hey just go to the apothecary and like ask for like cocaine good sir
Hmm. Japanese Beatles.. so you just mass attacked my basil.. pretty impressive 12 hour damage for a dumb large hard body.. not as impressive as my three minute squish your army dead with my fingers. So you want to dance with me.. start up the music mystro and hear comes hell. you attack the plant herders personal basil and were literally having an orgy while doing this. Id try and teach you respect, but why bother your remaining existence will be hell and very soon you will be gone forever.
I have some 33000 hot peppers pushing nice output already.. you guys like spicy food? We will start with this.. and begin to research what terrible plagues you freaks are susceptible to.. how about some mites.. that would work out very well. we shall see.
being quite dramatic as this should be a cake battle.
edit: looks like your grubs don't like fungus to much and neem wrecks you and destroys your ability to reproduce.. tisk
tisk.. im digging some parasitic nematodes as well.. hell and death to the first hidden stage. love it when nature can be used to destroy undesirable nature. that and I role organic and love my microbe team members and treat them right. Tick tock
www.almanac.com
I have some 33000 hot peppers pushing nice output already.. you guys like spicy food? We will start with this.. and begin to research what terrible plagues you freaks are susceptible to.. how about some mites.. that would work out very well. we shall see.
being quite dramatic as this should be a cake battle.
edit: looks like your grubs don't like fungus to much and neem wrecks you and destroys your ability to reproduce.. tisk
tisk.. im digging some parasitic nematodes as well.. hell and death to the first hidden stage. love it when nature can be used to destroy undesirable nature. that and I role organic and love my microbe team members and treat them right. Tick tock
How to Get Rid of Japanese Beetles in the Garden
Japanese beetles carry a big threat because they will feed on a wide variety of plants. Identify, control, and get rid of Japanese Beetles with these tips from The Old Farmer's Almanac.
Last edited:
No more foraging for shrooms for me... cannot emotionally afford disturbing other forms of life by flipping logs, scratching undergrowth and generally upsetting a natural order.
If a shroom jumps out and bites me while on walks in nature... OK. Otherwise those worms, spiders and other creatures are safe from my self centeredness.
This decision makes me feel pretty good about where my state of mind actually lies.
If a shroom jumps out and bites me while on walks in nature... OK. Otherwise those worms, spiders and other creatures are safe from my self centeredness.
This decision makes me feel pretty good about where my state of mind actually lies.
Nurse Ratched
Bluelight Crew
I moved a small log the other day off of my property and there was a huge ass wolf spider under there. Have you ever seen one of those puppies?
Their bodies are freakin' huge. Startled the hell out of me but moved his house back to the tree line anyway. I assume he is watching me at night and plotting his revenge.
I have this thing about spaces and respecting them. If something is in my "domain" and will not leave me alone I either try to put it outside or kill it.
If I am in their domain I leave it be and move on... if it tries to "attack" gotta do what I gotta do.
But yeah those wolf spiders are a scary bunch and a little worrisome, imo.
Too bad we have gotten so far away from mutual understandings. lol
Hmm. Japanese Beatles.. so you just mass attacked my basil.. pretty impressive 12 hour damage for a dumb large hard body.. not as impressive as my three minute squish your army dead with my fingers. So you want to dance with me.. start up the music mystro and hear comes hell. you attack the plant herders personal basil and were literally having an orgy while doing this. Id try and teach you respect, but why bother your remaining existence will be hell and very soon you will be gone forever.
I have some 33000 hot peppers pushing nice output already.. you guys like spicy food? We will start with this.. and begin to research what terrible plagues you freaks are susceptible to.. how about some mites.. that would work out very well. we shall see.
being quite dramatic as this should be a cake battle.
edit: looks like your grubs don't like fungus to much and neem wrecks you and destroys your ability to reproduce.. tisk
tisk.. im digging some parasitic nematodes as well.. hell and death to the first hidden stage. love it when nature can be used to destroy undesirable nature. that and I role organic and love my microbe team members and treat them right. Tick tock
How to Get Rid of Japanese Beetles in the Garden
Japanese beetles carry a big threat because they will feed on a wide variety of plants. Identify, control, and get rid of Japanese Beetles with these tips from The Old Farmer's Almanac.
So I’m almost feel bad.. I did not even have time to resort to bio or chem.. what was originally a vibrant feast orgy, turned rapidly into a wary greatly reduced population and finally today to a few bugs so.. seemingly so mentally effected they didn’t even try to flee.. just sat there and got crushed almost willingly.
It’s weird because of the research I’m doing on learned helplessness.. it’s just kinda unnerving me a little. Also they likely work of some sort of chem enfermone type draw.. doesn’t seem to be water soluble.
They seem to be pretty much crushed
Last edited:
Jerry Atrick
Bluelight Crew
Aww hell, AFAIK wolfies are harmless to humans. They may look big and scary but I don't think they will attack you unless maybe you disturb their personal space. Besides, they catch and eat bugs that may actually be nuisances in the house.I have this thing about spaces and respecting them. If something is in my "domain" and will not leave me alone I either try to put it outside or kill it.
If I am in their domain I leave it be and move on... if it tries to "attack" gotta do what I gotta do.
But yeah those wolf spiders are a scary bunch and a little worrisome, imo.
Too bad we have gotten so far away from mutual understandings. lol
The only spiders I fear are black widows and brown recluses. I'd be skeered live in Australia because they got trapdoor spiders and other big dangerous ones IIRC.
I no longer feel bad and they are getting the neem this evening.. enjoy