One thing I think would help this thread a lot would be if everyone took people's anecdotes seriously and stopped assuming that what is true for one person is true for someone else. I don't doubt the magical reports of MDMA, and have never doubted that proper MDMA is out there. Those fortunate enough to have good connections should count themselves as lucky. Those who are not that fortunate should be happy for the magic rollers and be hopeful that good times are ahead. We would save a lot of time and pointless debate if we just accepted where other people are coming from.
Exactly, thank you for saying this. I think there is meh and magic both out there right now. People who are just saying "you only think it's good because you never tried the old stuff" are just sounding arrogant to me, especially when in the same breath they often say "I can still get the old stuff so I know the difference." Okay so if you can still get it why do you think I can't?
In fact during that roll yesterday me and my friend both took some powder we found lying around in our respective stashes, mine turned out to be absolute magic whereas she she felt very much meh from hers. Luckily I did bring that half a pill with me just in case any of the powder turned out to be meh, and since I didn't need it I gave it to her and she came up on my level as soon as the pill hit.
@Wilson Wilson Sounds like you had an amazing experience. I recall those moments of opening up and accessing a vulnerable but safe place. My ex (who was pretty closeted) was once able to talk about some early homosexual experiences that he had never talked about before, and admit to some lies he had told me throughout our relationship. That was a characteristic of the MDMA I used to have access to. You could talk and wanted to talk. MDMA sessions used to be a place where you could bring up all of those topics that were too awkward to hash out under normal circumstances. That's one of the reasons why the total inability to talk and desire for others to stop talking seems so out of place with the Meh product I have had in recent years. Can you imagine someone opening up and talking to you and your mental reaction is just "shut up, please"?
You just described the experience perfectly man, that's exactly what it was. I am a very closed off person for various reasons, which I was able to just openly explain in that moment (among many other things) without feeling embarrassed or awkward or anything, it just felt natural to speak from the heart. This is so different to how I normally am, where I have a hard time even processing emotion let alone expressing it, like I literally cannot even find the words, and I have all these psychological defence mechanisms which just disappear, that in the moment I just feel so free and able to be myself and it really sticks with me. It really shows me why they used this stuff for therapy and are running trials to do so again.
And yeah if you are both on good stuff that's when it really shines. It would feel horrible if you opened up with all this stuff but the other person just didn't care. This is why I make sure whenever I roll with someone I get the stash in, because I know my stuff is good.
Something else I thought was pretty special about that roll is I was given oxy for the comedown and it definitely helped bring me down smoothly, especially with the physical symptoms I tend to get at the tail end of a strong roll (lots of physical discomfort), but it also made me realise just how meh oxy is as far as drugs go. I mean I was just rolling all day, opening up as a person, feeling real close to someone, but at the same time we had a laugh and told jokes and just had fun, it was crazy how it was so fun yet so deep, a chill day out where you can bring up difficult issues without any of the emotional toll you'd normally get, and how it was mixed in with just having a great time, a seriously magic experience.
Then as the oxy was coming up I just began stumbling about, got lost for a bit, finally got home, laid down in bed and nodded out for a couple hours, tried and failed to get Rick and Morty playing on my TV, dropped my phone on my face a few times in the process, and eventually gave up and just fell asleep.
I can't lie and say the oxy didn't feel good. It did. But doing both in the same day, I couldn't help but compare those two experiences and realise just how poorly the oxy compares. The MDMA actually genuinely helped me and a friend work through shit in our lives and at the same time have an amazing day together. Like a day out with a close friend also being a therapy session but all good vibes. The oxy, well, had me feeling super drugged out and stumbling around like a pisshead before just falling asleep after failing to operate my phone.
I bring this up because I used to be hooked on oxy. And yet this is the second time I've had a dose since quitting and both times have just reinforced that I made the right decision to quit it. The first time, in fact, I was given a strip of 80's for free with another deal, tried one, and straight up just gave the rest away. This time I had just one half for the comedown, but was not fiending for more, in fact I was glad I didn't spend money on it.
During the time since quitting oxy I've used LSD, MDMA, ketamine, and weed instead because I figured I needed to get my head straight instead of trying to run from my demons. I honestly think it's succeeded and helped to change me for the better. It's not the only factor, other things also happened in my life that I think made me no longer feel such a deep urge to escape reality, but I think those experiences with LSD, MDMA, and ketamine helped me see things differently and put me on that good path in life in the first place. And the weed helps to replace opiates as my go to chill out drug for when I do wanna just space out.
Basically I feel like I have a lot to thank the whole "mind exploring" class of drugs for, they helped put me on a better path from being self-destructive trying to hide from myself.
And see you can tell I'm on an afterglow cuz look how real and open I'm still being.