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mal3volent said:
Cap, if you want your body svelte and trim...if you want your ass plump and firm... if you want all your orifices taut and puckered...get off the gluten and on the liquor.
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my ass plump and firm - moreso than my f buddy
and yea i'm not talking about whorella I"m talking about skinny britches
lol that's my code word for him.. skinny britches

I don't care about my orifices i want htem ince and wide like I'm able to breathe

THIS IS TOO CODESPEAK FOR ME WHAT ANAL THINGS ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

I don't do anal myself I just stick my D in everything

iirc
 
Painful One said:
Aha! Loved the message @DopeM
and I accept your apology and I also apologize myself.
You are correct that I am a tad bit touchy this morning seeing as how I just got released from hell and all.

I ran myself out of morphine, clonazepam, and gabapentin and yes, all three hellraiser demons dragged my poor soul to hell.
I have learned the error of my ways.

Just knock it off already!

You couldn’t send me a message because I have my profile set to accepting messages only from “friends”.
I will consider adding you to the list if You will cease and desist all mean actions towards me henceforth!

Peace my brother!
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But what if a rando tries to send you butt pics?
 
Captain.Heroin said:
my ass plump and firm - moreso than my f buddy
and yea i'm not talking about whorella I"m talking about skinny britches
lol that's my code word for him.. skinny britches

I don't care about my orifices i want htem ince and wide like I'm able to breathe

THIS IS TOO CODESPEAK FOR ME WHAT ANAL THINGS ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

I don't do anal myself I just stick my D in everything

iirc
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The award for Top of the Year goes to...

CAPTAIN H!
 
devilsgospel said:
Yeah plus I take real nasty dumps after drinking all evening/night

Apparently I "did damage to my pancreas" and suffer from "alcohol related pancreatitis". According to the internet.

It was definitely from that day I ate nothing but Venezuelan food and drank a bottle of 50% Ouzo
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I caught the fatty liver according to the internet. My doctor tells me it was a series of pour life choices but mainly alcohol abuse. He claims it can be reversed with some minor changes to my habits, but that mfer has been saying the same exact shit every physical for 5 years. So, sho rly needs to change their habits?! Cmon doc it's tight in front of your face!
 
devilsgospel said:
The award for Top of the Year goes to...

CAPTAIN H!
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I'm thinking to myself. Top what! What is it the top of? Top post of the year? Top dog? Top advice? Wtf is it top of? And then it hit me like a speeding money shot to the square of my back... Which isn't a gr8 anal ogy bc im guessing gay dudes don't pull out

Also, we have just received word from our producers that money shot is a term specifically for recieiving a load to the face. The correct term would be jizztrough or simply cumback.
 
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mal3volent said:
Beer makes me gassy, liquor doesn't, that was my point
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oh

I don't care if I fart

that's like the least of my concerns

thank you MAL

I'm more concerned w/ other GI issues <3

you're the best

everyone around me holds their farts LET IT OUT we're all human

that shit will dissipate

the last party I was at this girl next to me kept farting

i can't smell anything from heroin snorting I don't care

lol

be more comfortable w/ your body = we're all human = inner peace

How-to-Cook-Frozen-Peas-_-500x375.jpg
 
DopeM said:
gay dudes don't pull out
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No, they don't. 99% of them are on "the pill" (prep) and do not care that it doesn't cover 100% of the virus.

Like it legit surprises me I'm still hiv neg but the odds for a top are pretty fucking low.

mal3volent said:
not unless you want it in the mouth
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lol

no comment

i don't want to disturb dopem

or the other heteros
 
Captain.Heroin said:
No, they don't. 99% of them are on "the pill" (prep) and do not care that it doesn't cover 100% of the virus.

Like it legit surprises me I'm still hiv neg but the odds for a top are pretty fucking low.


lol

no comment

i don't want to disturb dopem

or the other heteros
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Some ppl are genetically protected I believe. Thank your lucky stars monica
 
DopeM said:
Some ppl are genetically protected I believe. Thank your lucky stars monica
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the odds for a white person like me are P low

I just like to fuck, I think I just got lucky every time

I've even fucked w/ cuts on my dick

That doesn't bother me

Nothing does anymore

Got tested in nov still neg

I was surprised

then I tried settling down with WHORELLA who probably ate all the cum they could

ahhahhahaha I love blaming ppl for their sexual predicaments

and then I was like "get lost you sober loser" and he took a beer and ran out, hiding that beer on his way out

lul

alcoholics are great to fuck
 
WHORELLA I DON'T MISS YOU I FOUND A BETTER THING AND I'D RATHER SOMEONE'S SIDE PIECE THAN YOUR BOI BECAUSE YOU'RE DEVOID OF LOVE ON THE INSIDE YOU'RE DEAD YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD AND YOU SHOULD JUST DIE

I can't say that to their face, they're actively suicidal

but I said it to ya'll so you know where my brain's at

because I ain't gonna lie having ur heart stomped on hurts
 
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