I had a pretty high dissociative tolerance to begin with and doses like 3 mg didn't really register as a trip for me, I didn't feel high and I could usually sleep just fine (though a few mg more and I would be restless and dazed) so in that sense I never felt that mania or psychosis were near, not at all.
Depression or anhedonia, well kinda - you could say that my dosage was still not low enough to be therapeutic and some depression/anhedonia while not severe may have canceled out any beneficial effect. It's hard to say anyway since I had a really shitty couple of.. well years.
Nothing is good for everyday use? Well it's usually a tradeoff but for say methylphenidate or pregabalin, everyday use is not such a weird thing and many people think it's worth it. Is everything that is not marketed and regulated as medication by definition bad for you? I don't know, it could have been quite good. Wouldn't have surprised me if it were like ketamine AD + a DRI, but cognitive effects may have bothered DRI benefit and for ketamine-like AD it may require much lower microdosage / 3-MeO is too potent.
The message is: it's not quite as good as it seemed, in a sneaky way I'd prefer others wouldn't have to discover themselves.
Depression or anhedonia, well kinda - you could say that my dosage was still not low enough to be therapeutic and some depression/anhedonia while not severe may have canceled out any beneficial effect. It's hard to say anyway since I had a really shitty couple of.. well years.
Nothing is good for everyday use? Well it's usually a tradeoff but for say methylphenidate or pregabalin, everyday use is not such a weird thing and many people think it's worth it. Is everything that is not marketed and regulated as medication by definition bad for you? I don't know, it could have been quite good. Wouldn't have surprised me if it were like ketamine AD + a DRI, but cognitive effects may have bothered DRI benefit and for ketamine-like AD it may require much lower microdosage / 3-MeO is too potent.
The message is: it's not quite as good as it seemed, in a sneaky way I'd prefer others wouldn't have to discover themselves.

, we'll see what the guidance / treatment in this new place will be - I have a fresh new home of my own, now if I can get over all the shit I've been through and get motivated again, I'll be a happy bastard. It couldn't hurt to try ADD medication, although for my mood I am much less willing to go on monoamine reuptake inhibitors of any kind - for my case also things that will probably be suggested by my new shrink - such as an NDRI or whatever. I mean, a DRI like MPH will be okay but that is quite different from medications that need to reach blood levels over time and change balance / brain chemistry, e.g. SSRI's etc. I don't trust them and don't want to go on them.