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Men hitting women?

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That is fucking terrible. Do you even know how to comedy?

The joke is what do you say to a women with two black eyes? Subtle difference I know, but one that prevents you from giving away the punch line (see what I did there?) in the lead up.

Thank you for this explanation and indeed lesson in humour. It's well known round the world that us Brits lack the ability to deliver comedy so your input will really help us kick on.
 
Better be seeing some improvement from your end sometime soon RLP. OTW knows his shit.
 
In my experience there are two groups of men.

1.) Those who have never and would never hit a woman under any circumstances whatsoever.

2.) And those who have hit a woman "once" because she somehow had it coming.

Jus sayin
 
I think blue1995 put the word "once" in quotation marks for a reason.

They're wrong though, my ex decided to kick me in the shins one day! Fucking hard as well. I kicked her back. I didn't use full force, but she felt it! It fucking hurt (her kick). And yet I do not habitually beat up women.
 
In my experience there are two groups of men.

1.) Those who have never and would never hit a woman under any circumstances whatsoever.

2.) And those who have hit a woman "once" because she somehow had it coming.

Jus sayin

In my experience I've lived with two men now who would fit into both of those groups, said they'd never ever hit a woman, until I did something that annoyed him, irritated him, and I had it coming.

One of them destroyed my life, made me a shadow of my former self when I was with him, eventually putting me into a women's refuge, and when I first met him he was perfect, wouldn't dream of ever hurting a woman, even telling me this. Then, it started with verbal abuse, then a few slaps, being kicked out of bed,black eyes, until eventually it ended with his hands over my mouth twisting my neck so I couldn't breathe and him spitting the words 'I'm gonna fucking kill you bitch!' I'll let you go if you promise to shut up, even arming himself with a knife so armed police break my door in.

Then, it's happened again with another man who seemed perfect, said he's never ever in his life hit a woman, until I did something to snap his temper and I've had black eyes, finger marks around my throat. Some girls would think 'Maybe it's me, maybe I make him do it' I used to think that, but not now. Now I fight back, and do not let my walls down easily.
 
So sorry to hear that cherry, messed right up

I remember when i was 16 going out with a girl who used to get hit by her step dad, her mum had MS and did nothing to defender her, the fucker always had a funny look in his eyes, although was always charming face to face, anyway after seeing bruises on her more than once and a bit of a black eye i had it out with the cunt, i was upstairs watching tv at her place and she went downstairs, next thing i heard was screaming, and bang. my adrealine kicked in like nothing ive felt before, ran down the stairs ran over and smacked him, he pushed me back so i grabbed a cup off the table and threw it at him but missed, ranted and raved at the fucker, people screaming, her uncle came and turfed me out the house and told me to fuck right off, i stormed off
 
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