• MDMA &
    Empathogenic
    Drugs

    Welcome Guest!
  • MDMA Moderators:

MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 5)

Status
Not open for further replies.
howlowhowlstheowl said:
Today while jogging I felt like a mild sensation of the jaw clenching that happens sometimes with ecstacy. Why would that be? It wasn't strong but definitely there.. interestingly on the roll that led to my current state I don't remember having it. Today was a really bad day. I don't know why. All I can think of is that I ate more than usual yesterday. I'm so sick guys.. physically too.. most of you are working, studying.. I've been in bed all day. I forced myself to go for a jog but I'm starting to wonder if there is life after this. If it was just mood related I could have hope in some drug but what could I take for this. Wait and hope what else is there... I feel almost a little bit like a human now at bedtime so I don't want to sleep only to wake up to the same suffering again. It's 4am already.
I know it's only been 1 month 3 weeks... it feels like I'm in a constant seizure. Like that's why my eyes keep re-adjusting. My cognition feels the same. And there's a sensation of pressure behind my eyes.
Click to expand...

Some of y'all have something like occipital neuralgia - neck muscles like scalenes can cause cranial nerve issues that lead to pain around the eyes and jaw pain.

Scalenes are inhalation muscles that tend to get kicked in with heavy breathing (exercise and anxiety). They attach up into the back of the head where they can affect cranial nerves.

Occipital neuralgia can lead to various symptoms.

Both SSRIs and MDMA seem to have some effects on the cranial nerves. One scenario is that after the cranial nerves are already cranky from MDMA, musculoskeletal issues (scalene activation with anxiety) further irritate the nerves.
 
Hey guys,

Haven't been on here for a while. I need some advice, the doc prescribed me Sertraline. I took half a pill and had a really bad panic attack with hot flushes and my heart rate increased. Basically I felt like I was back 1 year ago when I did MDMA and felt like I was overdosing. Does anyone know id Sertraline is good or bad ? Or was it just me being anxious ?
 
Scratcher said:
Hey guys,

Haven't been on here for a while. I need some advice, the doc prescribed me Sertraline. I took half a pill and had a really bad panic attack with hot flushes and my heart rate increased. Basically I felt like I was back 1 year ago when I did MDMA and felt like I was overdosing. Does anyone know id Sertraline is good or bad ? Or was it just me being anxious ?
Click to expand...


Hey man, I'm on zoloft. I had a tough time the first week and then it got better after that.
 
Hey guys, so today I"ve hit the one year mark since my last dose of MDMA. I can't believe it has been this long honestly. My symptoms now are DP/DR, visual snow, tinnitus, head pressure. I'm on zoloft and seroquel both at 50mg. Yesterday I just accepted a job offer. This is something that would seem unthinkable three months ago. I've had the LTC as bad as anyone could have it. I was on the brink of absolute madness several times and on the phone to the suicide hotline a couple times. I'd like to thank Cotcha, And Adubbs among others who talked me off the ledge.

For you guys starting out, just realize that you ARE going to get better. I can't promise full recovery but it will get better in one way or another. However, it's entirely in your hands. Fuck around with caffeine, alcohol, more drugs, 5htp, and you're taking your life in your hands. I, myself used caffeiene and 5htp and it has kept me from 100 percent recovery. I firmly believe that. You all know the rules, no drink or drugs, exercise, socialize, keep your mind occupied. Time heals most people.

Be wary of boards and support sites. There are people on these sites lying about their symptoms, lying about their recoveries etc. You just have to use your common sense. Listen to your body.

At around the eight month mark, my recovery had plateaued and I knew I wasnt going to get better on my own. So I took a risk and went with zoloft and seroquel to help with sleep and state of mind. It has helpd, although marginally, with all symptoms and coping with everything. The decision to go on meds is a big one and one that you have to make on your own. Do extensive research, and understand your risks and rewards. Know the drugs better than the doctors. You guys ever seen the movie The Marian with Matt Damon? I feel like this process is a lot like that. We are on our own with only our mind to figure out these problems and the solutions are different for everyone. When we figure this shit out, we get to come home. We will all make it home. Keep the faith guys. I'm always available for a pm or whatever you need.

God bless,
Fred
 
Last edited:
I'm looking into some meds in general--

I react extremely poorly to SSRIs so not an option at all for me.

On the list besides Lamictal are the MAO inhibitors like Moclobemide which wiki says is a "RIMA" (reversible monoamine oxidase A inhibitor). Not available in the US though. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moclobemide

Is that one any good? Wiki says it doesn't cause sexual dysfunction and supposedly increases Testosterone levels (which if true would contribute to an additional antidepressant effect)

And another MAOI called Emsam/Selegiline patch which is available in the US but that appears to be an irreversible inhibitor which sounds kind of scary.

Nobody ever talks about MAOIs here or in general.
 
I have seen a video where a guy took testosterone supplements and it cured his dp/dr. I think he did this under medical Supervision, checking his levels etc.
 
fnono33 said:
I have seen a video where a guy took testosterone supplements and it cured his dp/dr. I think he did this under medical Supervision, checking his levels etc.
Click to expand...

Yea cause low T can cause all sorts of issues with anxiety+depression. But Cotcha has also said before that vice-versa is also a thing/causality is tough to establish since sex hormones can get affected by anxiety+depression as well.

Mine is low-normal and my doc thought I need to try other things before resorting to exogenous Testosterone and then see if T levels recover on their own with the other things.

Supposedly there is also low dose Clomid, but with my visual problems I don't want to risk a SERM (its very rare but they can cause things like floaters, palinopsia, HPPD type stuff). Plus, even the (non-LTC) guys who take it often only experience a temporary benefit and then it starts creating mood problems I've heard.
 
Hey FNoNo, glad to hear your story man. You and I both have been in this a year basically, hard to believe it's been this long. Listen to his advice guys, it's good advice. Don't let ANYONE tell you what's going on, listen to what they have to say, and take it into consideration, but listen to your body first and foremost. After my OD I knew know on the inside I wasn't quite right a few weeks later.....I still had the off night of waking up in sweats, and developed one small floater. Drank and smoked weed for. A Weekend and it was hell all over again, and now see way more floaters, Tinnitus, BFEP, and this constant over adrenaline feeling that won't go away.... But I'm here! I'm working! I'm going about my day to day almost exactly the same
...so it can always be way worse. Stay strong all, it gets better if you do the right things...it won't get worse.
 
I don't mean to preach but I have seen/been through a lot. The sad fact is that the first few weeks are CRITICAL to your recovery and people in the first few weeks are thinking that it will just all pass so they don't take the LTC seriously.
 
Congrats on the job and improvements fnono. Why do you feel that you would not have improved on your own after the 8 months? Not that it matters, we all do what we think is best and our situations and symptoms vary so much. I'm just curious..
 
After about 6 months of shifting worsening and plateauing symptoms I could feel it deep down. My symptoms were deeply ingrained. Maybe I would've healed, I was just using my gut and it's usually correct. At this point I am just hoping to manage symptoms.
 
Regrets9995 said:
Who has lied about their recovery?
Click to expand...

I'm mostly referring to Facebook groups. People are lonely, people want to help other People, people want to hurt other people. I'm not sure why they do it. I guess everyone had a motivation at any given moment.
 
Last edited:
Is Agomelatine (Valdoxan) any good for the LTC?

I read about it here https://selfhacked.com/blog/7-health-benefits-agomelatine/

I saw some people in the very early recovery threads which I browsed talking about it, but seems like it hasn't really been mentioned since. Also still wondering about the MAOIs like Moclobemide which is a reversible one and Selegiline which is irreversible.

Also---what about Stimulants? I know they create problems for most people in the LTC but I seem to do ok with caffeine luckily. Something like Ritalin would probably be pushing it too much but is it of any value in improving mood/motivation at least transiently? Are there any risks of it worsening tinnitus issues?

For the record, I have read about some people using Adderall or Ritalin or Modafinal to treat DP/DR weirdly enough, but seems to be a minority.

Btw this is the reason I use the term "LTC" bc a lot of people with straight up MDD have been prescribed these things and done all right whereas people with the 'LTC'/drug induced issues seem to be ultra sensitive. I honestly do not think the % of "med/supplement sensitivities" is the same


I want to stay away from anything that is pro-serotonergic and go more toward Dopamine/GABAergics.
 
Take a pass on the L-DOPA.

Agomelatine can supposedly help with some suppression of dopamine cell firing that can happen with SSRIs (mostly at the beginning of ssri use), but this is due to its 5-HT2C antagonism property and you can find this property on other antidepressants like Mirtazapine or Amitriptyline.

I've been told it sucks for sleep.

Some people have paradoxical reactions to stimulants like Ritalin and can get calmer/less anxiety, but I would definitely stay away from amphetamine. Very different drugs those two.

I really haven't heard anything abou MAOIs used for LTCs, but doctors still try them when other treatments fail for depression/bipolar depression.

I think it's mainly a safety thing rather than an efficacy thing that keeps them from being prescribed more often. There is also probably less financial incentive to prescribe them compared to an on-patent antidepressant.
 
I have used L-dopa in the form of Mucuna Pruriens and found it to be helpful for libido issues here and there but not much else. I've also used L-Tyrosine.

Relative to 5-HTP at the very least I seem to be ok but others get anxiety/depressive reactions like I did with 5-HTP. Any reason to "pass" on the L-dopa (ie mucuna pruriens) supplement? Were you thinking of the medication levodopa or something which is totally different when you said that?

Re the agomelatine though that sucks if one of its main points is supposedly to reset your sleep architecture.

Didn't realize Adderall and Ritalin were that different but you are right. Seems like the hierarchy goes Caffeine< Modafinal < Ritalin < Adderall?

I'm currently also trying 200 mg SAM-e but I can't say its doing much right now.
 
^I was indeed thinking of dopamine replacement therapy for Parkinson's patients style L-DOPA

Agomelatine might help some people sleep but some people may be better off with trying extended release melatonin

That stimulant hierarchy sounds about right although modafinil isn't necessarily clearcut, I could see various reactions to it. Certainly not something somebody with sleep troubles would want to take

Depending on if someone has ADHD/ADD or not then Ritalin isn't necessarily clearcut either. There is also atomoxetine, which is a selective NRI that will boost dopamine primarily in the PFC while supposedly lacking the euphoriant properties of Ritalin (which directly affects dopamine transmission)

I suppose I should mention Cymbalta and the old tricyclic antidepressants which also increase norepinephrine signaling, Amitriptyline being one to note.
 
Cotcha Yankinov said:
^I was indeed thinking of dopamine replacement therapy for Parkinson's patients style L-DOPA

Agomelatine might help some people sleep but some people may be better off with trying extended release melatonin

That stimulant hierarchy sounds about right although modafinil isn't necessarily clearcut, I could see various reactions to it. Certainly not something somebody with sleep troubles would want to take

Depending on if someone has ADHD/ADD or not then Ritalin isn't necessarily clearcut either. There is also atomoxetine, which is a selective NRI that will boost dopamine primarily in the PFC while supposedly lacking the euphoriant properties of Ritalin (which directly affects dopamine transmission)

I suppose I should mention Cymbalta and the old tricyclic antidepressants which also increase norepinephrine signaling, Amitriptyline being one to note.
Click to expand...

Isn't NE the sort of 'bad' part of a stimulant? IE the anxiety inducing effect? While dopamine is the 'cleaner' catecholamine which boosts motivation/libido/drive etc?

That is why I never wanted to go to SNRIs/TCAs (besides potential sexual sides).

Caffeine does weirdly help me but its a brief effect. I don't have any sleep issues other than likely getting too much REM sleep. I just wake up feeling totally unrested although I do sleep.

I still do not drink coffee everyday as I am well aware that acute effects and long term effects are different. So I keep it down to maybe once or twice a week.
 
It's actually fairly established that NE release is important for the desireable effects of releasing agents like MDMA and amphetamine, selective dopamine releasing agents are apparently not that magical although they raise libido and make people compulsive

If you're waking up feeling unrested and that continues to be a problem then at some point you should consider a sleep study
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top