I've had several run ins. In all of these you have to remember that I'm between 18 - 19, short, D cups, naturally pretty and I have a southern drawl that sounds like honey being poured on a cathead biscuit.
1. I was going down south to do a pick up. I got two ounces and took a different route home. It was 4th of July. I started tripping when I saw a TON of blue lights on the state line. I stopped at the road block, rolled down my window and the cop said he was checking for drunk drivers. I gave him my biggest cheerleader smile and said, "Oh, darlin', I'd never do such a thing. A lady doesn't act in such-a way." He blushed and asked if he could see my license just to because it was his job. I said, "why yeah sugar but my number ain't on it." *giggle* Cop is a puddle. I grabbed my clutch purse which contained the two ounces in the zippered pocket and tried to get my license out of the little plastic display part. Of course I had my nails done and the sumbitching thing wouldn't come out. He said, "here, hand it to me. I can see it clearly." So I handed him my wallet with two ounces of meth in it. He looked at my license and heard the plastic crinkle inside the wallet. He gives me a what the fuck look and I said, "Oh, you'll have to excuse that. I've got my, gosh I can't believe I'm saying this in front of a man like yourself, but those are my little helpers for when my aunt comes to visit." *giggle, blush* He looks me at me like crazy and I said, "you knowwwww, my aunt flow..." He looked utterly mortified and shoved my wallet back at me. I blew him a kiss and drove away. I had to pull over in a couple miles because I was shaking so hard and crying from pent up terror.
Incident #2 Don't forget, everyone loves a southern girl.
I'm in Detroit with my sister's old man. We had just picked up some heroin and clean rigs, plus a bottle of vodka. He was passed out in the back of my car and I was obviously sober and driving. I get blue lighted and pull over. Cop comes up, license and registration whatever, then asks me what I'm doing so far from home. I told him I was on a nurses retreat. He's looking around and asks me why there's a passed out guy in my back seat. I told him that I'd found him in that state and was taking him to a homeless shelter, "because honey, don't ya know that's what Jesus would do?" He agreed but said he would need to check things out. I said, "okay darlin', you step over and I'll shimmy out there with ya!" *wink, cop is dying* Its just pure luck that I had on my hooters shirt and the smallest pair of demin shorts I could squeeze in to and my trusty cowboy boots. I stepped out, pulled my hair down so it went in curls all down my back and stood ridiculously close to the cop with my bright eyes staring up at him and smiling. He tried to say something, choked on air, got embarrassed and walked back to his car. I sat on the hood of my Jeep and checked my nails. Another cop pulls up, gets out and speaks to cop one. I said, "are we having a party? Goodness me, I didn't even do my make up!" *giggle* Cop one says, "you don't need make up." Cop two hits him in the stomach. "For a party. You don't need make up for a party. We're not having a party but you wouldn't need it if we were partying." Totally blubbering. I giggled and said, "why thank ya sugar. I don't think you need make up either!" *big wink and smile* Cop one is dying. Cop two pulls Darrin out of the car and wakes him up. He was so fucked up he looks around and says, "where am I? Who the fuck are you? Get your hands off me!" Starts struggling with cop two. Cop two pins him against the jeep and searches him. Finds the shit and the rigs. Puts him in his car. Cop one starts asking me all kinds of questions about who he is and where I found him and if he knew he had drugs. *big wide eyes* "No I surely did not. I'd not have a thing to do with him if I did! I's just trying to do what I believe is the Christian thing." Cop one nods solemnly in agreement. Cop two comes over and tells me I have to be searched. I said, "okay!" Spread my legs, slapped my hands on the hood of my jeep, flipped my hair and looked back at them. Wiggled my ass and giggled. Cop one has a full blown hard on that he can't hide. Cop two looks hella nervous. "Well, ya ain't scared, are ya darlin'? I don't bite. You can search me!" Huge smile. Cop one stutters and finally chokes out, "so uh ma'am you uh Consent for me to search you?" "Why yeah! I'm not a bit scared of ya! Should I be? Are ya gonna get me?" *big smile, inviting ass wiggle* Cop two huffs and starts towards me. Cop one hollers "I'LL DO IT. SHE CONSENTED TO ME." He pushed past cop two, stands behind me and just stares for a second then finally does the slowest body search there has ever been in the history of cops. Tries to be polite. I said in a very pouty voice, "are you not gonna check my back pockets?" Super sad face. He lights up and sticks a hand in each pocket. I push back in to his hands and giggle. He squeezed my ass, realized what he had done, jerks his hands out of my pockets and steps back. Cop two has been searching my car during this. I slip over to him and say, "if you find any money, I claim it!" Cop two just rolled his eyes and huffs. Dick. Cop one says, "do you need some money?" "Why, darlin', I'll be okay. I've been in worst shape. Sides, if I run out of gas, I'll just pull over and sleep in my jeep til one of the girls can get me in the morning." Cop one grabs his wallet out of his pants and flips out three twenties. He offered them to me and I said, "No, honey. You work hard for your money. I'll be okay." He insisted that I take the money, gave me his number in case I EVER needed ANYTHING EVER, put me back in my jeep and sends me on my merry way!