NeverEndingCycle
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2015
- Messages
- 1
These Chains, You Can Never Break Free From...
This is a story about a girl who never seemed to fit in. Starting at the age of 12. She grew up with divorced parents. For the majority she's always lived with her mother. Her mother married her step father when she was only 5. So he pretty much raised her. They were both alcoholics and got prescription pain medicine. Her step father stayed drunk and her mother was money hungry and sold pills. They fought constantly. He was also a stroke victim and lost most of his speech and mobility. Very difficult person to live with most of the time. While her mother is double bipolar and has multiple personality disorder. But she grew up in a nice house and neve had to do with out anything. But first and foremost money does NOT create happiness. So when she was 12 she kind of started rebelling. She smoked cigarettes and then started smoking Marijuana. So months went by and she turned 13. Over the summer of school being let out she met a girl. (She was a lesbian). They started dating. They became inseparable. They were always together. They started doing pills together. Oxycodone 30mg. Started off just for fun, then lead to a full blow addiction. Feining, stealing, craving, sickness, withdrawals. She started her freshman year of highschool. And in the middle of the year her and her girlfriend broke up. After all that time. She was devastated. Miserable. Broken. Depressed. Empty. So of course she started using even more heavily. Alcohol, with pills, with boxes, and weed. Hanging out with new people and a few points she came to the edge of overdosing at that point of lying in the backseat of a car who knows where with her head out the door begging for God to either kill her or help her overcome this. And that whole period of time her ex girlfriend continues to play with her and lead her on and breaking her heart multiple times. Finally she kept getting in trouble with school and home she got sent to a juvenile detention center, and then a group home that had a rehab center. She was gone for quite a long time. Multiple cycles of this and multiple facilities. When she finally got home for good she was 16. She stayed clean and sober and out of trouble for a year. Everything seemed to be improving. Then the storm came..her step dad of which she was very close to committed suicide, because of the alcohol, the stroke and being unable to communicate barely or live a normal life and obviously done with life. After that happened, she stayed strong as she could until her and her mother lost their house and everything they had because they couldn't afford it and moved. When they started getting on their feet she met a man. Didn't see him coming at all. She thought what she felt for her ex girlfriend was true love..but it was nothing compared to what she felt for this man. It was love at first sight. Head over heels in love. And she fell fast too. He was like 4 years older than her. They had lived in the same small town their wholes lives and somehow had never met. Their relationship moved very quickly. They moved in together maybe a month after they started dating. Everything was perfect. On in the relationship she talked him into doing a few pills with her every now and again which he never did before. So they did and everything was fine. Then they started doing them more often than not. She got pregnant and they stopped everything. 3 months in she had a miscarriage. They kind of fell apart then. Lost their apartment and moved in with their parents again. He started being really hateful, and bossy. She still would have walked the end of the earth for him though... nothing would ever change that. But she would stay with friends and somehow got around people using crystal meth. She never used it before. Swore she wouldnt. But of course she did. She snorted it. First time she fell in love with it. The feeling was unlike anything she ever felt before. Instant euphoria. On top of the world. Invincible. Happy. Content. Smart. Confident. Unstoppable. After that she was hooked. Hiding, and lying. Until one day she asked him to try it. Eventually it made her go into her own little world. Not caring about anyone or anything. She would sit on the couch for days in silence not eating or sleeping. Just drawing or picking at her face or playing with the dope or scraping bags.. She talked him into it and they started using together. Her more frequently though. So they moved in with a friend that only used occasionally. They both got factory jobs and started buying in large quantities and selling it at work and making a good profit. But she would sneak and use behind his back. He caught her one day and all hell broke loose. The law got called and when he opened the door he informed them she was doing dope. They found all of it and arrested her on possession of methamphetamine and paraphernalia charges. And he also had a warrant for some receiving charges. So they both went to jail. She bonded out a week later and went back to her mother's house. Got accepted into a court program for addicts. He was still in jail and eventually got bonded out. Awaiting sentence. They of course stayed together. She had to stay sober because of the program. He snuck behind her back and used pills. He started acting different, really distant and depressed. She would come home and he would be in the dark or just always dragging around. He apparently got into some other thieving trouble and was on the run. So he would come see her or she would meet him every chance she got. One night he came over and they made love and he sang songs to her and told her how much she meant to him and then he told her he was going to leave her house and go straight to turn himself in. He was only facing a year and probably would have gotten parole after 6 months. She wanted him to stay longer and make love one more time but he said he had to go. She of course got mad at him and she did take him to his truck and when he got out of the car he asked for a kiss and her stupidly saying no over being a little mad. He drove off. She followed him but he was driving so fast she lost him she looked everywhere she knew to go and even waited by the police station for an hour. She couldn't find him so she decided to go home and he would probably show up like he always did. She fell asleep and around 12 AM she got a phone call from her sister telling her that he had committed suicide. She broke down. Instantly fell to the floor and wheeped. After that she stayed sulking in the house for months on months isolating and lost all connections with the world besides the things she was required to do for the program. As time went by she slowing started getting out more. And life began again. Although he was always in her heart and mind, she had to keep living. About 10 months after he died she completed the program she was in. She had almost 2 years of sobriety. She had a full time job, a nice car she paid for, got her GED, a house she rented, she had real true friends, and was a active member in the community and the AA program, and she had just met someone that was very sweet and kind, who made her feel again. He also was a recovering meth addict. So they had common stories. But not even a week after she graduated the program the urge hit. She knew she could use with out having to get drug tested anymore or consequences. They got high together. And there went 2 years of sobriety. That goes to show you how addicting meth is. It destroyed your life forever. No matter how many programs or how much sobriety you get or what you work for and gain in life..the urge and addition is so strong that it is always there and never goes away. Very few people ever recover from a meth addiction. Please don't ever use meth or any drugs for that matter and please listen to someone's story so maybe it will impact you decision to not ruin your lives. And I know that's so cliche but drugs really do destroy you and everything along the way.
This is a story about a girl who never seemed to fit in. Starting at the age of 12. She grew up with divorced parents. For the majority she's always lived with her mother. Her mother married her step father when she was only 5. So he pretty much raised her. They were both alcoholics and got prescription pain medicine. Her step father stayed drunk and her mother was money hungry and sold pills. They fought constantly. He was also a stroke victim and lost most of his speech and mobility. Very difficult person to live with most of the time. While her mother is double bipolar and has multiple personality disorder. But she grew up in a nice house and neve had to do with out anything. But first and foremost money does NOT create happiness. So when she was 12 she kind of started rebelling. She smoked cigarettes and then started smoking Marijuana. So months went by and she turned 13. Over the summer of school being let out she met a girl. (She was a lesbian). They started dating. They became inseparable. They were always together. They started doing pills together. Oxycodone 30mg. Started off just for fun, then lead to a full blow addiction. Feining, stealing, craving, sickness, withdrawals. She started her freshman year of highschool. And in the middle of the year her and her girlfriend broke up. After all that time. She was devastated. Miserable. Broken. Depressed. Empty. So of course she started using even more heavily. Alcohol, with pills, with boxes, and weed. Hanging out with new people and a few points she came to the edge of overdosing at that point of lying in the backseat of a car who knows where with her head out the door begging for God to either kill her or help her overcome this. And that whole period of time her ex girlfriend continues to play with her and lead her on and breaking her heart multiple times. Finally she kept getting in trouble with school and home she got sent to a juvenile detention center, and then a group home that had a rehab center. She was gone for quite a long time. Multiple cycles of this and multiple facilities. When she finally got home for good she was 16. She stayed clean and sober and out of trouble for a year. Everything seemed to be improving. Then the storm came..her step dad of which she was very close to committed suicide, because of the alcohol, the stroke and being unable to communicate barely or live a normal life and obviously done with life. After that happened, she stayed strong as she could until her and her mother lost their house and everything they had because they couldn't afford it and moved. When they started getting on their feet she met a man. Didn't see him coming at all. She thought what she felt for her ex girlfriend was true love..but it was nothing compared to what she felt for this man. It was love at first sight. Head over heels in love. And she fell fast too. He was like 4 years older than her. They had lived in the same small town their wholes lives and somehow had never met. Their relationship moved very quickly. They moved in together maybe a month after they started dating. Everything was perfect. On in the relationship she talked him into doing a few pills with her every now and again which he never did before. So they did and everything was fine. Then they started doing them more often than not. She got pregnant and they stopped everything. 3 months in she had a miscarriage. They kind of fell apart then. Lost their apartment and moved in with their parents again. He started being really hateful, and bossy. She still would have walked the end of the earth for him though... nothing would ever change that. But she would stay with friends and somehow got around people using crystal meth. She never used it before. Swore she wouldnt. But of course she did. She snorted it. First time she fell in love with it. The feeling was unlike anything she ever felt before. Instant euphoria. On top of the world. Invincible. Happy. Content. Smart. Confident. Unstoppable. After that she was hooked. Hiding, and lying. Until one day she asked him to try it. Eventually it made her go into her own little world. Not caring about anyone or anything. She would sit on the couch for days in silence not eating or sleeping. Just drawing or picking at her face or playing with the dope or scraping bags.. She talked him into it and they started using together. Her more frequently though. So they moved in with a friend that only used occasionally. They both got factory jobs and started buying in large quantities and selling it at work and making a good profit. But she would sneak and use behind his back. He caught her one day and all hell broke loose. The law got called and when he opened the door he informed them she was doing dope. They found all of it and arrested her on possession of methamphetamine and paraphernalia charges. And he also had a warrant for some receiving charges. So they both went to jail. She bonded out a week later and went back to her mother's house. Got accepted into a court program for addicts. He was still in jail and eventually got bonded out. Awaiting sentence. They of course stayed together. She had to stay sober because of the program. He snuck behind her back and used pills. He started acting different, really distant and depressed. She would come home and he would be in the dark or just always dragging around. He apparently got into some other thieving trouble and was on the run. So he would come see her or she would meet him every chance she got. One night he came over and they made love and he sang songs to her and told her how much she meant to him and then he told her he was going to leave her house and go straight to turn himself in. He was only facing a year and probably would have gotten parole after 6 months. She wanted him to stay longer and make love one more time but he said he had to go. She of course got mad at him and she did take him to his truck and when he got out of the car he asked for a kiss and her stupidly saying no over being a little mad. He drove off. She followed him but he was driving so fast she lost him she looked everywhere she knew to go and even waited by the police station for an hour. She couldn't find him so she decided to go home and he would probably show up like he always did. She fell asleep and around 12 AM she got a phone call from her sister telling her that he had committed suicide. She broke down. Instantly fell to the floor and wheeped. After that she stayed sulking in the house for months on months isolating and lost all connections with the world besides the things she was required to do for the program. As time went by she slowing started getting out more. And life began again. Although he was always in her heart and mind, she had to keep living. About 10 months after he died she completed the program she was in. She had almost 2 years of sobriety. She had a full time job, a nice car she paid for, got her GED, a house she rented, she had real true friends, and was a active member in the community and the AA program, and she had just met someone that was very sweet and kind, who made her feel again. He also was a recovering meth addict. So they had common stories. But not even a week after she graduated the program the urge hit. She knew she could use with out having to get drug tested anymore or consequences. They got high together. And there went 2 years of sobriety. That goes to show you how addicting meth is. It destroyed your life forever. No matter how many programs or how much sobriety you get or what you work for and gain in life..the urge and addition is so strong that it is always there and never goes away. Very few people ever recover from a meth addiction. Please don't ever use meth or any drugs for that matter and please listen to someone's story so maybe it will impact you decision to not ruin your lives. And I know that's so cliche but drugs really do destroy you and everything along the way.