Mental Health Eating disorders support thread v.2

^ Listen to this man, he knows what he's talking about =D

... I am so fat and ugly ...

Haha now that's impossible. Sure you could eat nothing but ice cream and chocolate for a couple of months and still be hawt :) Good work with the fruit and salads but don't cut out carbs completely or you'll have no energy; just try to keep them to the morning like museli or oats etc for breakfast.

Bah, yesterday was a failure. Feeling really depressed so fasted, went to the gym, and got high for the first time in like 3 weeks >.<
 
I have scratched the surface with anorexia a few years ago when i was about 15 or 16. i would eat once a day if that for about a year and lost a bunch of weight. Im now 19, 5'10ish and bounce around the 135-140 range but i would like to be around 160. Its just that people always call me really skinny and more or less a faggot/gay because of my body figure which makes me feel worse because people/my family would say that i was fat before..

I have a girlish figure for a guy (big hips, small arms, basically curvey). this feeds into my anxiety and depression and even when im hungry i can attempt to eat but usually eat very little amounts at a time, almost having to force it down. Sometimes i even choke on it so i stop eating. its depressing, but i know its not that serious. It probably doesnt help that i smoke a pack of cigarettes a day either though. its a vicious cycle trying to gain weight and always coming up short because of how theres a society standard for what is normal.
 
Ugh, this is out of CONTROL for me right now.

While I've been on a drug and alcohol bender for the better part of the past 6 weeks, my ED issues are under control. When I stop using, I just can't handle it. Everything goes to another extreme. I am so sore right now, and all i want is a fucking drink or something to just deter me from this; but i cant for like two weeks because of these antibiotics. And I've googled and googled how bad it would be to drink on these, and I just cant do it. The consequences are terrible. I just feel so fucking fucking FRUSTRATED. Thank fuck I am seeing my drug therapist tomorrow because right now I am on the fucking edge.
 
n3o so sorry you're still having such a hard time of it. you are beautiful though! it is petrifying when you feel like you just keep gaining weight and don't know when it will ever stop, well its petrifying the other way round too. i hope you're proud of the fact you've managed to already take some positive steps by eating fruit and salad.

belarki ttoally get what you mean about how comments that should make you wanna eat more healthily can help motivate you to continue to eating badly! hope you're ok and glad you can see some progress even if you feel like you're slipping again.

and hayyzz that sounds horrible, good luck with the therapist tomorrow. can you in any way take the fact that you're staying strong and not drinking as a positive? i know the consequences would be terrible for you but maybe in a worse place you might still have gone ahead anyway?

i haven't felt nauseous in ages. its wonderful. i stopped going to the gym when i wasn't properly eating because i wanted to do everything i possibly could to prevent losing weight (when i didn't feel like just giving up and going with it...), but not going to the gym wrecked my confidence in my body. need to get back into the habit but keep putting exercise off til tomorrow. definitely eating a lot less than when this whole will it/wont it relapse started but my metabolisms adjusted.
 
n3o i am so sorry your having such a rough go of it. I can assure you without the shadow of a doubt that there is certainly nothing wrong with your body as it is a very fine body indeed =D . I really hope you can get it under control again soon because i know how damaging that can be to your body.

My ex g/f has battled with a eating disorder for years and honestly there where times when i thought she would die from it :( . She certainly had nothing wrong with her body either and was certainly never overweight so i had a hard time understanding at first why she wanted to loose any weight. But it is a addiction so i can understand that much. She now suffers from a heart condition that was due to the abuse done to her body because of the severe anorexia she had :(

I have never had a real eating disorder but for a year or more on and off i only ate when i absolutely had to because i was going through a really rough time with my bipolar disorder. I got very depressed for months at a time and i get the type of depression where you feel like doing nothing but sleeping. I would basically only get out of bed to have a smoke and get something to drink. I ended up going from my usual weight of around 175lbs to about 150lbs or less in the course of a few months because i was literally too fucking miserable to eat. It took energy which i did not have and i had no desire for food at all since eating seemed like a chore to me in that fit of horrible depression. Thankfully my bipolar is now under control the best it's been in ages so i don't have any problems with depression induced starvation anymore. Just thought id share my story on that.

Get better soon n3o <3
 
n3o: no you're not. Really.

That said, I feel the same way. Since I've bunged my knee I've pretty well stopped all physical exercise, my asthma's come back with a vengeance, and I've started bingeing again. I don't even want to say all that I had this evening, but let's just say that I should never ever buy pasta again. But, the warm, just shy of overfull feeling is just such a comfort. Granted, overfull for me is a lot; my stomach is pretty distended.
 
I forgot about this thread and it is a wonderful thing not to need it anymore.
However, I am here to lend emotional support for those who are still struggling.

About 7 months of therapy helped me a few years ago to acknowledge and accept the root causes of my binge eating disorder of 19-20 years. Consistent exercise has also helped immensely with my body image and self love. I have moved on from the cycle of abuse and self loathing. It can be done <3
 
Tell us what you are feeling, glitter_kiss - how have you got into the cycle and what is making it particularly bad at the moment? Are you getting any support for your ED? <3
 
I don't mean to intrude or dismiss glitter_kiss's concern, but I also come to this thread for help.

I'm not a person w/ an ED or anything like that, but my gf is. She's heavily concerned with her image and her body. She used to not go without eating for days. Since she met me, that has kind of stopped, but she still inherently feels pretty bad about herself. She's gorgeous and means the world to me. It's really tough. I've learned by now that simply telling her how beautiful she is won't help. It's deeper than that and it's about her accepting herself. I don't know what to do to help her. She's very nervous to go seek professional help as she is worried that it won't help. I can't exactly force her to go in either you know?

I just wanna know what I can do to help.
 
gk- you can get past it. its hard, but you can. as effie said, are you getting any help?

Laiika- I honestly don't know what to say. my boyf couldn't do anything right (from my perspective) when i had my ed, he was unwaveringly supportive, never gave me an inkling of how much i was ripping him apart by doing that to myself. this is her personal battle, you can make it easier for her but you can't cure her, and it will have a personal cost to you. i'm not saying don't do it, but ready yourself. if you are going to help her confront her issues it will be difficult and to help her best you need to be mentally prepared and get your own support network. try to confront her about things when they come up, but don't be aggressive, raise them from a perspecitve of calm but genuine concern.

am very unhappy today. i think i've got my first proper bleeding in over 4 years and i feel soooo, i don't know. somethings left me. i'm not ready for this.
 
Slipping into old habits...

A while back now, in my not too distant youth, I struggled with what some would call an eating disorder whereby I was on this never ending vicious cycle of binging and purging. I guess as a young kid at the time image and appearance mattered a lot more to me than my health. I stopped all of that at about 20 when I finally pulled my head out of my a** and realised what I was doing to myself. I got pretty sick too as i dropped some serious weight (got to 45kgs and my height is 165cm).

Anyway, several years on now and I have gained some serious weight after being in a long term relationship, working long hours and not always having the time to exercise or eat properly. I do some light to moderate exercise of late however I have not managed to shift the extra 20kgs I have put on since stopping the purging.
Recently I've commenced purging again. Not on a daily basis like in the past but every now and then when i feel guilty after eating a seriously fatty meal. Last few weeks I've done it more and more though, at least 3-4 times per week and again im finding myself obsessing over food, consumed with ideas around eating and the guilt that comes with that.

No-one knows that I'm getting back into this habit and I dont particularly wish to share this with friends, family or my partner as I'm ashamed about this to be honest.
At the expense of sounding like I'm blowing smoke up my own as*, I am an intelligent, ambitious and mature woman so to become self obsessed with my body image again is almost too shamefull to bear. I can feel myself slipping into old habits and I hate it. Please help.
 
maybe try looking at it like - the more you hide purging the more guilt you will probably feel doing so, the more you feel guilty for eating unhealthy, the more you associate yourself as a guilty person, who is doing "wrong" and should feel ashamed. now having negative feelings like shame, you learned how to try and make lonely shame and guilt, reverse into temporary, solitary, comfort and control...but, now as per usual with this sort of thing, this addiction, you are losing the control comfort and sense of solitary comfort.


continue maybe letting this be out in the open, and accept the confidence that comes doing so, you deserve it.
im sure...
;-)
 
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Just because you have to start over, proves to yourself that you can do this, You have to get the right help, but hey...you have done this before, I have quit smoking cigarettes (not at all close) many times, relapses they happen. When you start to feel guilty, remember how hard you worked and what you accomplished the last time you set your mind to it. Get your support, and do not beat your self up over it. We are only human. You have already made the first step to dealing with it, you brought it out in to the open and you told people. Now you are no alone with it! Be well, be good and do not let the feelings of guilt distract the feeling of knowing you can do it..because you already have...And please do not be ashamed, being mad at yourself will only make you feel worse and it will be harder. Think POSITIVE! Know what you are capable of...and eh you got of track, get back on.
 
Eating disorders are some of the most insidious, hard to stop, and indeed pervasive psychological issues of our day. Especially, but of course not exclusively, among women. I myself have been backsliding into this behaviour as well, of late; I'm a binge eater myself.

I'm going to merge this with the Eating Disorders thread, both to improve visibility and hopefully expose you as well to the excellent advice and experience therein.
 
I understand how you feel, but there really is no shame in it at all. It's the same as any other psychological problem - something to be addressed and tackled, but not something that should ever shame you. Don't let it colour your perceptions of yourself, if you can help it.. if there is any way you can confide in a good friend or your partner, it could be a great source of comfort to you, although I fully appreciate how difficult this is.

Have you seen an eating disorder therapist in the past? What did you do to break the cycle last time? You are in a much stronger position now, even if you don't feel it yourself - the biggest obstacle with any psychological problem is often believing that it is possible to overcome it. You know it is possible, you've done it once before :) <3

Good luck, let us know how you are getting on <3
 
i hate obcessiing about my weight i realy do, but fuck ever since i weighed myself a few weeks i cant stop thinking about it. i know ive lost a bunch o wieght recently but evertime i look in the mirror i want to lose more, i mean my bmi is 20.8 but i still feel fat i just dont know what to do
 
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