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Why are women attracted to men who are assholes?
- Thread starter L O V E L I F E
- Start date
Catch-22
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2001
- Messages
- 4,518
Whew, being "nice" really sucks. 
All day people just treated me like some sort of a schlep. Well, it is Friday night so I am gonna just sit at home and wait for the phone to ring. Maybe a girl will finally realize my virtues (the biggest one being "patience") and reward me with a phone call because she needs a shoulder to cry on....before eventually running back to that dude who didn't even get her a Valentine's Day card. Wish me luck, everyone!
All day people just treated me like some sort of a schlep. Well, it is Friday night so I am gonna just sit at home and wait for the phone to ring. Maybe a girl will finally realize my virtues (the biggest one being "patience") and reward me with a phone call because she needs a shoulder to cry on....before eventually running back to that dude who didn't even get her a Valentine's Day card. Wish me luck, everyone!AbraMontague
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 31, 2000
- Messages
- 1,006
It sounds like some of you "nice guys" made a few serious mistakes, looking desperate in particular. If a girl knows you will always be available for her, you are gonna get burned pretty regularly. I mean come on, she can "have" you anytime so she's gonna go out with her more confident and less desperate ex. After all, he has a busy live and is probably doing something else the next day. But you will still be available...just in case she gets tired of doing laundry sometime and can't get in touch with ANYBODY else.
You can try a different approach, or you can just become an asshole.
You can try a different approach, or you can just become an asshole.
Ezza
Bluelighter
If deep down, you are a genuine and good person, please stay like that. Changing into an arsehole in an attempt to find happyness in a relationship is an oxymoron, (a contradiction) I couldnt or wouldnt be an arsehole because if I live my life like that, I would be unhappy with myself.
If you are a good person, chances are you have a great bunch of true mates, because thats the kind of people you will attract. Hang with them, talk to them about it, and just think, they would not be there for you if you were someone your not.
Saying all this however, I understand how hard it is that we seem to be shafted so often in the love game. It does hurt, especially when so many people seem to be finding someone who makes their heart beat faster.
I guess when we do find someone special, all the hurt will seem insignificant compared to the joy we will one day feel.
If you are a good person, chances are you have a great bunch of true mates, because thats the kind of people you will attract. Hang with them, talk to them about it, and just think, they would not be there for you if you were someone your not.
Saying all this however, I understand how hard it is that we seem to be shafted so often in the love game. It does hurt, especially when so many people seem to be finding someone who makes their heart beat faster.
I guess when we do find someone special, all the hurt will seem insignificant compared to the joy we will one day feel.
NoodleGurl
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2001
- Messages
- 469
I've never seriously dated an asshole.
I've seriously dated two guys. Both were successful, kind, smart, talented. The first one wasn't for me, so we split after several years.
My boyfriend now, and the one I hope to always be with, is not only kind, smart, talented and successful, but cute, romantic, funny, masculine, affectionate, devoted, basically perfect.
It's weird, too, because I'm pretty plain and not an eye-catcher. But I'd like to think of myself as being smart, honest, conscientious, but I don't take crap from anybody. Certainly no boyfriend of mine.
So having that attitude has paid off, I guess. So many girls go for the assholes, and leave the good ones for me
As for the asshole factor, I agree about the arrogant, rich, good looking guy. However, I think there's another angle. The asshole is standoffish, and doesn't care about any girl. If this girl can *change* him, and make him care about her, well then that's an ego boost, and she feels oh so special. Just a theory.
I've seriously dated two guys. Both were successful, kind, smart, talented. The first one wasn't for me, so we split after several years.
My boyfriend now, and the one I hope to always be with, is not only kind, smart, talented and successful, but cute, romantic, funny, masculine, affectionate, devoted, basically perfect.
It's weird, too, because I'm pretty plain and not an eye-catcher. But I'd like to think of myself as being smart, honest, conscientious, but I don't take crap from anybody. Certainly no boyfriend of mine.
So having that attitude has paid off, I guess. So many girls go for the assholes, and leave the good ones for me
As for the asshole factor, I agree about the arrogant, rich, good looking guy. However, I think there's another angle. The asshole is standoffish, and doesn't care about any girl. If this girl can *change* him, and make him care about her, well then that's an ego boost, and she feels oh so special. Just a theory.
min
Bluelighter
I'd rather be a nice guy and get no play, than be a jerk and get plenty. In the former case, at least I have a clear conscience. Besides, there's always porn and booze. ;-)
liquidocean
Bluelighter
14 theories on assholes and those that supposedly love them. WARNING, these are just theories!:
(for the sake of making points, let's assume the asshole is male, and the victim is female)
- My naive theory is that in reality they don't like, date, or fuck assholes, they just give them fake numbers to get rid of them and parhaps use them occaisonally for drinks, sex, rides, money, dinner, and drugs. And of course they would never love them of give themselves completely to them like they would to me, a 'nice guy'.
and now we descend into the maelstrom that is the female mind......
- a woman is attracted to a guy that resembles an asshole boyfriend from the past who dumped her and broke her heart, a guy she can never be with again, so she picks a guy that resembles him. Imagine a girl losing her virginity to a guy that dumps her soon afterwards, i'm sure she'll go out with least 4 guys like him in her life, trying to vainly reclaim some part of her lost innocent adolescence from a wound that never healed.....
- one of the legacies of evolution is that women are biologically drawn to alpha-males, and being an asshole is the superficial projection of being an alpha-male, the 'Hollywood' syndrome. I think women are biologically wired to accept that if a guy does not need to suck up to get what he wants, morover, if can be an asshole and still get what he wants, he must be: very good looking, rich, connected, or that mysterious wildcard, POWERFUL, which happens to be the #1 aphrodesiac. And for what purpose are women biologically wired? And what is the relationship between procreation and power?
- women want a tough-skinned man who will listen to their whining and submit to her verbal abuse; a sensitive man will make her feel guilty for being the driven psychopath that she is. Thin-skinned sensitive males make for poor whipping boys and punching bags: they see through the charade, plus they bruise way too easily .
- if a guy is 'sensitive', there is going to be this very dark, freaky, psychopathic side of him that will eventually come out, usually with disastrous results. Whereas if a guy is a simple macho misanthrope, he is going to have no secrets, he will never be silent with his thoughts, he will be predictable, and easy. And likewise, if a guy does not show natural outward hostility or insensitivity, he is obviously keeping it bottled up for the day he 'goes postal'
- women are afraid of eventually finding happiness and contentment in a relationship. ultimate success is scary. Therefore they sabotage their relationships, the easiest way being to pick an asshole as a relationship partner. And then they can have excuses, power trips, and loads of fun cigarette and coffee sessions with their chick friends where they denounce the whole male half of the human species
(reasons why?: perhaps her skeletons, baggage, and overall lifestyle are not cleaned up enough to be able to share them with another person. Perhaps it's fear of being intimate with somebody else. Perhaps they love their single lifestyle. Perhaps it's peer pressure to stay single. Perhaps it means giving up on Mr. Perfect and going for Mr. Pretty Good Find. Perhaps they'r afraid of getting sucked into the 'suburban mom' lifestyle)
- of the male stock that's out there, 70% of them are assholes, 15% are taken, and all the good looking, well dressed and good dancing ones are gay
- or maybe there's an actual plethora of intelligent stud-muffins out there and women, with their rather fucked intuition, see them through those dreaded 'Nice Guy Glasses'. The term 'women's intuition' means squat to me, i've seen women discard the most available, intelligent straight guys for capital W capital L Wifebeating Losers.......
- there still exists the primal archetype of the post-modern valiant male who kicks the ass of an impending bully in the proverbial warehouse/niteclub district late at night, thus insuring his woman's safety. And since assholes do the sand kicking at the beach, and nice guys eat sand, they put their money on the asshole to take care of them.
- if a guy's an asshole, more often than naught he's been fucked over by women and this is is retribution. However, that means he might be able to be fucked over, making him ripe for the proverbial kill.......
- women want to be able to date many guys for material or sexual reasons so they pick guys that are easy to dump. Or they pick guys they know won't call back. Or they pick guys they're not going to want to talk to again. Or she picks guys that are unpalatable to her friends, so they won't back-stab her and fuck him. Or she picks someone her boyfriend would hate, just to snub him. (i'm sure it's more common than we think). And women that want to get fucked hard in bed would probably steer themselves towards asshole shores.
- Let me not forget to mention that women typically get very attached to a person they're having sex with, so if they don't look out, they might get swept away into an tide of emotion they are not pragmatically prepared to handle; therefore waking up to mr. asshole in the morning will be an instinctual reminder not to get too attached unless she really means it.
- assholes tend to have more money and power, which is good for the 'courtship' and good if they get married. assholes also tend to be more aggressive, which is important because women are still in the passenger seat, courtship-wise. It is much more common for a woman to submit under the pressure of an aggresive male than for a woman to solicit a passive male, likewise the early bird gets the worm, and we know what natural selection thinks of lackadaisacal sperm.
- perhaps women pick assholes out of some masochistic tendencies that arise from residue of unresolved parental/familial relationhips. not pleasant indeed, but i'm sure i've seen people that could be characterized as so. It's sad, but some women are looking for someone that's beyond dominating; some feel drawn towards abusive people for one reason or another . And some women have been brutalized to believe that they are not worthy of anything better than an asshole. Or perhaps more commonly, the parent's generation might suggest a gallant gentleman, so the rebellious teen goes for the pierced jocko asshole just to be anti-authoritarian. Not to bring up family ties again, but it's like Mallory picking Nick over Skippy. (And not to dis' Nick, he was an 'artist' after all)
these are just theories, debate at will, i'm just tossing them out for discussion, i love women with all their divine and kooky characteristics. sorry if i sound misogynistic, i'm just probing women's minds and what makes them tick.
[ 18 February 2002: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
(for the sake of making points, let's assume the asshole is male, and the victim is female)
- My naive theory is that in reality they don't like, date, or fuck assholes, they just give them fake numbers to get rid of them and parhaps use them occaisonally for drinks, sex, rides, money, dinner, and drugs. And of course they would never love them of give themselves completely to them like they would to me, a 'nice guy'.
and now we descend into the maelstrom that is the female mind......
- a woman is attracted to a guy that resembles an asshole boyfriend from the past who dumped her and broke her heart, a guy she can never be with again, so she picks a guy that resembles him. Imagine a girl losing her virginity to a guy that dumps her soon afterwards, i'm sure she'll go out with least 4 guys like him in her life, trying to vainly reclaim some part of her lost innocent adolescence from a wound that never healed.....
- one of the legacies of evolution is that women are biologically drawn to alpha-males, and being an asshole is the superficial projection of being an alpha-male, the 'Hollywood' syndrome. I think women are biologically wired to accept that if a guy does not need to suck up to get what he wants, morover, if can be an asshole and still get what he wants, he must be: very good looking, rich, connected, or that mysterious wildcard, POWERFUL, which happens to be the #1 aphrodesiac. And for what purpose are women biologically wired? And what is the relationship between procreation and power?
- women want a tough-skinned man who will listen to their whining and submit to her verbal abuse; a sensitive man will make her feel guilty for being the driven psychopath that she is. Thin-skinned sensitive males make for poor whipping boys and punching bags: they see through the charade, plus they bruise way too easily
.- if a guy is 'sensitive', there is going to be this very dark, freaky, psychopathic side of him that will eventually come out, usually with disastrous results. Whereas if a guy is a simple macho misanthrope, he is going to have no secrets, he will never be silent with his thoughts, he will be predictable, and easy. And likewise, if a guy does not show natural outward hostility or insensitivity, he is obviously keeping it bottled up for the day he 'goes postal'
- women are afraid of eventually finding happiness and contentment in a relationship. ultimate success is scary. Therefore they sabotage their relationships, the easiest way being to pick an asshole as a relationship partner. And then they can have excuses, power trips, and loads of fun cigarette and coffee sessions with their chick friends where they denounce the whole male half of the human species
(reasons why?: perhaps her skeletons, baggage, and overall lifestyle are not cleaned up enough to be able to share them with another person. Perhaps it's fear of being intimate with somebody else. Perhaps they love their single lifestyle. Perhaps it's peer pressure to stay single. Perhaps it means giving up on Mr. Perfect and going for Mr. Pretty Good Find. Perhaps they'r afraid of getting sucked into the 'suburban mom' lifestyle)
- of the male stock that's out there, 70% of them are assholes, 15% are taken, and all the good looking, well dressed and good dancing ones are gay
- or maybe there's an actual plethora of intelligent stud-muffins out there and women, with their rather fucked intuition, see them through those dreaded 'Nice Guy Glasses'. The term 'women's intuition' means squat to me, i've seen women discard the most available, intelligent straight guys for capital W capital L Wifebeating Losers.......
- there still exists the primal archetype of the post-modern valiant male who kicks the ass of an impending bully in the proverbial warehouse/niteclub district late at night, thus insuring his woman's safety. And since assholes do the sand kicking at the beach, and nice guys eat sand, they put their money on the asshole to take care of them.
- if a guy's an asshole, more often than naught he's been fucked over by women and this is is retribution. However, that means he might be able to be fucked over, making him ripe for the proverbial kill.......
- women want to be able to date many guys for material or sexual reasons so they pick guys that are easy to dump. Or they pick guys they know won't call back. Or they pick guys they're not going to want to talk to again. Or she picks guys that are unpalatable to her friends, so they won't back-stab her and fuck him. Or she picks someone her boyfriend would hate, just to snub him. (i'm sure it's more common than we think). And women that want to get fucked hard in bed would probably steer themselves towards asshole shores.
- Let me not forget to mention that women typically get very attached to a person they're having sex with, so if they don't look out, they might get swept away into an tide of emotion they are not pragmatically prepared to handle; therefore waking up to mr. asshole in the morning will be an instinctual reminder not to get too attached unless she really means it.
- assholes tend to have more money and power, which is good for the 'courtship' and good if they get married. assholes also tend to be more aggressive, which is important because women are still in the passenger seat, courtship-wise. It is much more common for a woman to submit under the pressure of an aggresive male than for a woman to solicit a passive male, likewise the early bird gets the worm, and we know what natural selection thinks of lackadaisacal sperm.
- perhaps women pick assholes out of some masochistic tendencies that arise from residue of unresolved parental/familial relationhips. not pleasant indeed, but i'm sure i've seen people that could be characterized as so. It's sad, but some women are looking for someone that's beyond dominating; some feel drawn towards abusive people for one reason or another
. And some women have been brutalized to believe that they are not worthy of anything better than an asshole. Or perhaps more commonly, the parent's generation might suggest a gallant gentleman, so the rebellious teen goes for the pierced jocko asshole just to be anti-authoritarian. Not to bring up family ties again, but it's like Mallory picking Nick over Skippy. (And not to dis' Nick, he was an 'artist' after all)these are just theories, debate at will, i'm just tossing them out for discussion, i love women with all their divine and kooky characteristics. sorry if i sound misogynistic, i'm just probing women's minds and what makes them tick.
[ 18 February 2002: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
Xplore
Bluelighter
I don't have the time to comment right now (Saturdays suck for time) but by sun/mon I'll be back; this seems like a great thread. IF someone already posted this, Mods should delete my post.
OK, pasted below is an article I thought was relevant - some guy Terrence asked a similar question. The title, though, is Why Women Date Loosers? and I think it's important to frame our discussion with word Loosers in mind, not just assholes. BTW, the article doesn't cover some of the good sides assholes may have, so I'll add them later.
what's your worth?
If, instead of being an average guy with good looks and a lot to offer, you were an average guy with spectacular looks and even nothing to offer, you'd be getting some serious attention from those "unapproachable" goddesses. Even from some of the married ones.
Now as we all know, the real beauties do go for the rich and powerful celebrities. Drop dead gorgeous women are essentially celebrities themselves, simply by virtue of their great beauty. They're genetic celebrities.
And since women always date and marry "up," these extreme beauties go for the "gold." The Reality Factor [see reality for what it is while dating and not follow your wants or wishes] says: beauty always finds the money and money always finds the beauty.
But besides these obvious reasons, it's difficult to know for certain why any woman really chooses the man that she chooses. Observed from an objective viewpoint, women's mate choices are often irrational, illogical, contradictory, and rather arbitrary. To you Psych majors: women are inconsistent.
rebel with a cause
So, Terrence, there's more than one possible explanation for why these beauties go for the borderline (or even full on) criminal type, the crazed musician with more piercings than a pin cushion or the creepy loser who can't keep a job. And every stunningly gorgeous babe will choose differently based upon her level of self-esteem, her emotional maturity and her upbringing.
Still, there is one thing that the types of males that I've described above have in common. They're all rebels in some way. They're not socially acceptable. If a beautiful woman has a lot of anger toward her father, and many of them do, she can symbolically give "the finger" to Daddy by choosing, for instance, a drug dealer with a bone through his nose for her boyfriend.
Also, as strange as it sounds, dangerous men make many women feel safe. All women crave safety and security and a guy who's done "hard time" makes some women feel safe and protected. She knows that he'll crush any other guy who hassles her, and beautiful women do get harassed a lot.
The other thing that all these types of guys tend to have in common is a kind of detached, "don't give a crap," attitude. So these 10s perceive them as extra manly, confident and a Challenge.
Keep in mind, Terrence, that just because she's beautiful on the outside, it doesn't mean she's clinically sane on the inside. Just because she has a fantastic body on the outside, it doesn't mean she has common sense on the inside. Just because she has gorgeous breasts and long legs on the outside, it doesn't mean she's marriage material.
Remember, guys, beauty is only skin deep but character is to the bone.
IF someone already posted this, Mods should delete my post.OK, pasted below is an article I thought was relevant - some guy Terrence asked a similar question. The title, though, is Why Women Date Loosers? and I think it's important to frame our discussion with word Loosers in mind, not just assholes. BTW, the article doesn't cover some of the good sides assholes may have, so I'll add them later.
what's your worth?
If, instead of being an average guy with good looks and a lot to offer, you were an average guy with spectacular looks and even nothing to offer, you'd be getting some serious attention from those "unapproachable" goddesses. Even from some of the married ones.
Now as we all know, the real beauties do go for the rich and powerful celebrities. Drop dead gorgeous women are essentially celebrities themselves, simply by virtue of their great beauty. They're genetic celebrities.
And since women always date and marry "up," these extreme beauties go for the "gold." The Reality Factor [see reality for what it is while dating and not follow your wants or wishes] says: beauty always finds the money and money always finds the beauty.
But besides these obvious reasons, it's difficult to know for certain why any woman really chooses the man that she chooses. Observed from an objective viewpoint, women's mate choices are often irrational, illogical, contradictory, and rather arbitrary. To you Psych majors: women are inconsistent.
rebel with a cause
So, Terrence, there's more than one possible explanation for why these beauties go for the borderline (or even full on) criminal type, the crazed musician with more piercings than a pin cushion or the creepy loser who can't keep a job. And every stunningly gorgeous babe will choose differently based upon her level of self-esteem, her emotional maturity and her upbringing.
Still, there is one thing that the types of males that I've described above have in common. They're all rebels in some way. They're not socially acceptable. If a beautiful woman has a lot of anger toward her father, and many of them do, she can symbolically give "the finger" to Daddy by choosing, for instance, a drug dealer with a bone through his nose for her boyfriend.
Also, as strange as it sounds, dangerous men make many women feel safe. All women crave safety and security and a guy who's done "hard time" makes some women feel safe and protected. She knows that he'll crush any other guy who hassles her, and beautiful women do get harassed a lot.
The other thing that all these types of guys tend to have in common is a kind of detached, "don't give a crap," attitude. So these 10s perceive them as extra manly, confident and a Challenge.
Keep in mind, Terrence, that just because she's beautiful on the outside, it doesn't mean she's clinically sane on the inside. Just because she has a fantastic body on the outside, it doesn't mean she has common sense on the inside. Just because she has gorgeous breasts and long legs on the outside, it doesn't mean she's marriage material.
Remember, guys, beauty is only skin deep but character is to the bone.
CuPiD^^
Bluelighter
do u know how many of my female FRIENDS i get crying on my shoulder every week end?
im sick and tired of it.
I say, if u girls are STUPID enought to get yourself in those situations then u deserve to be hurt.
Girls dont really go for assholes, they go for guys who arn't Completely nice to them, that dont ring them all the time, its the "if i cant have it i want it" kinda thing.
then the obviouse happens.
well ladies, get used to it, cause unless u grow up, u r just gonna keep getting hurt.
I always hear from some girls i know "awww, why cant i h ave a bf liek u" (when they see me get my gf a present or flowers or take her out etc)
but then i think... hmmm
YOU CAN!
so i sit back, and watch a nice decent good looking guy slip through their fingers as they go off and sleep with a completely drugg fuked bum
seriousely im sick of it.
stop windging to us guys and your girlfriends cause ALL YOU GIRLS ARE JUST GONNA KEEP GETTING WITH THE ASSHOLES.
there are so many decent guys out there, and u do know them... so dont pull that " 70% assholes
15% taken bullshit)
how can u claim something like that, did u read it out of "dolly" magazine??
bah!
im sick and tired of it.
I say, if u girls are STUPID enought to get yourself in those situations then u deserve to be hurt.
Girls dont really go for assholes, they go for guys who arn't Completely nice to them, that dont ring them all the time, its the "if i cant have it i want it" kinda thing.
then the obviouse happens.
well ladies, get used to it, cause unless u grow up, u r just gonna keep getting hurt.
I always hear from some girls i know "awww, why cant i h ave a bf liek u" (when they see me get my gf a present or flowers or take her out etc)
but then i think... hmmm
YOU CAN!
so i sit back, and watch a nice decent good looking guy slip through their fingers as they go off and sleep with a completely drugg fuked bum
seriousely im sick of it.
stop windging to us guys and your girlfriends cause ALL YOU GIRLS ARE JUST GONNA KEEP GETTING WITH THE ASSHOLES.
there are so many decent guys out there, and u do know them... so dont pull that " 70% assholes
15% taken bullshit)
how can u claim something like that, did u read it out of "dolly" magazine??
bah!
bdreligrrl
Bluelighter
Originally posted by GTi Kid:
I think its cuz women give up too easily, Im good looking, and Im well off in my job... --- obviously confident, and unless you're a dick to me, Im not an asshole![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
liquidocean
Bluelighter
Biscophish
Bluelighter
Nichers
Bluelighter
While generally being looked over by females, I totally get that. I'm a fairly introverted person usually, so I know it's not easy for ppl who don't know me well to see who I really am. I actually have no prob w/ it.
As maybe some flag of hope for some of the 'good nice guys' out there.. When I've had chicky friends come to me drained and upset and hurt from some prick of a guy, and sat there for hours and hours, up late at night, talking them through it all and comforting them and trying to cheer them up a bit, and they've done the whole 'Why can't I get a guy like you' bit.. Well.. I've had a couple of them actually try going after me, when I eventually became single. Couple even tried ignoring the gf I was dedicated to completely at the time.
Just saying that.. Yeah.. You don't *need* to be a prick to get a decent girl. Good things come to those who wait. Or something. Remember, you're helping someone out because it's the right thing to do, not because you'll get something out of it.
Oh.. and after talking to a few friends about this whole thing.. One of them suggested that ppl who go for arseholes are filling some need in themselves, usually. It kinda makes sense.. If you've spent your whole life w/ shyt self-esteem, putting ourself down, and having ppl around you do it, then it feels 'normal' when you get a guy who does that, too. Vicious cycle.
As maybe some flag of hope for some of the 'good nice guys' out there.. When I've had chicky friends come to me drained and upset and hurt from some prick of a guy, and sat there for hours and hours, up late at night, talking them through it all and comforting them and trying to cheer them up a bit, and they've done the whole 'Why can't I get a guy like you' bit.. Well.. I've had a couple of them actually try going after me, when I eventually became single. Couple even tried ignoring the gf I was dedicated to completely at the time.
Just saying that.. Yeah.. You don't *need* to be a prick to get a decent girl. Good things come to those who wait. Or something. Remember, you're helping someone out because it's the right thing to do, not because you'll get something out of it.
Oh.. and after talking to a few friends about this whole thing.. One of them suggested that ppl who go for arseholes are filling some need in themselves, usually. It kinda makes sense.. If you've spent your whole life w/ shyt self-esteem, putting ourself down, and having ppl around you do it, then it feels 'normal' when you get a guy who does that, too. Vicious cycle.
ShiFtY2001
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 19, 2001
- Messages
- 93
Really, all you need to be in this world is moderately psychopathic. Then, not only do you get the money, the power and the women, you also dont give a damn. "Nice" people are doomed by natural selection. Oh yeah, I am one.
Honestly, how many times has this topic been posted????? It's just guys venting frustration at female decision making.
Now, this is how it works - the only 2 truths to life.
1: THE WANKERS GET THE WOMEN
2: NICE GUYS FINISH LAST
wakeup fools, you are being PLAYED LIKE A SUCKA!!!!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I USED to be a nice guy and get no pussy, but since I became a bastard the women keep a comin' (no shit,I swear). I don't know why women go for cocky bastards, but that is JUST THE WAY IT IS.
I want to be nice, but I want pussy more. I actually think the whole thing has made me bitter towards women in some way.
Its the way the game is played.
Lads, just one question and it is very simple:
1: Do you want to be nice (= no pussy)
2: Do you want pussy (= asshole)
your choice.
Now, this is how it works - the only 2 truths to life.
1: THE WANKERS GET THE WOMEN
2: NICE GUYS FINISH LAST
wakeup fools, you are being PLAYED LIKE A SUCKA!!!!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I USED to be a nice guy and get no pussy, but since I became a bastard the women keep a comin' (no shit,I swear). I don't know why women go for cocky bastards, but that is JUST THE WAY IT IS.
I want to be nice, but I want pussy more. I actually think the whole thing has made me bitter towards women in some way.
Its the way the game is played.
Lads, just one question and it is very simple:
1: Do you want to be nice (= no pussy)
2: Do you want pussy (= asshole)
your choice.
astrayalien
Bluelighter
Well, here's news. I've had fuckloads of awesome sex with gorgeous women and I'm considered by most to be a "nice guy".
Go figure?
As a rule I don't treat women like shit. Infact I'm a perfect gentleman. However, I never take crap. When I walk away I don't turn back.
I know who I am, what I want, and what I do best. I'm not cocky about it, and I don't expect every woman to like me.
There are so many variable elements in the dynamic between women and men. A fair few have been mentioned here.
"She picks assholes because she has an unbearable itch"......or whatever.
In the washup it doesn't matter a whole lot. We're all good and bad at once. We'll all be assholes at some stage (and she'll be a total bitch too). The dynamic between any two people is usually best when it's not forced, so just be yourself and know what you want.....and try to be a little a sexy too.
If you're an asshole and you get plenty of pussy, good for you. But I'm not an asshole and I'm getting plenty too.
Go figure?
As a rule I don't treat women like shit. Infact I'm a perfect gentleman. However, I never take crap. When I walk away I don't turn back.
I know who I am, what I want, and what I do best. I'm not cocky about it, and I don't expect every woman to like me.
There are so many variable elements in the dynamic between women and men. A fair few have been mentioned here.
"She picks assholes because she has an unbearable itch"......or whatever.
In the washup it doesn't matter a whole lot. We're all good and bad at once. We'll all be assholes at some stage (and she'll be a total bitch too). The dynamic between any two people is usually best when it's not forced, so just be yourself and know what you want.....and try to be a little a sexy too.
If you're an asshole and you get plenty of pussy, good for you. But I'm not an asshole and I'm getting plenty too.
liquidocean
Bluelighter
OK, i think i've got it. Being an asshole is like being crunchy or crispy. Being nice is like being creamy. Now, like any food you encounter (M&M's come to mind), you want the crunchy part on the outside and the creamy part on the inside. It makes a better taste sensation, plus it makes the logistics of handling and carrying the food all the easier. Would you like M&M's that smeared all over your hands and clothes, and then left you with a pit-like choking hazard?
And likewise, would women want a man who is outwardly a whimp to everyone, but in private is an abusive nazi?
No, she wants it the other way around. She wants a guy who will inspire fear and respect in other people, and in private, she will dominate her good catch secret nice guy.
[ 25 February 2002: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
And likewise, would women want a man who is outwardly a whimp to everyone, but in private is an abusive nazi?
No, she wants it the other way around. She wants a guy who will inspire fear and respect in other people, and in private, she will dominate her good catch secret nice guy.
[ 25 February 2002: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
L O V E L I F E
Bluelighter
For those who seem to have glossed over the author's (not me, btw) wittily phrased logical answer to his own question, and instead proceeded to complain about "Why are we having this st00pid debate again:"
Catch-22
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2001
- Messages
- 4,518
All this talk of M&Ms, fried chicken and cole slaw has got me hungry! 
But seriously....
Regarding Mr. Perfect vs. Mr. Not-So-Perfect
I have some very obvious strengths and some very obvious character flaws. I think some women like that they can hold onto my virtues, and feel comfortable about the reasons they are attracted to me, yet they also find comfort in my flaws. The advantage of obvious shortcomings is that the girl knows what she is getting and there is no secret double life under the surface. Meanwhile, six months later Mr. Perfect is arrested for having kiddie pr0n on his computer.
A kooky analogy
I have heard a few girls say that nice guys are like a grab bag. (A grab bag is when a bunch of random items are placed in a closed plain brown sack. A customer buying a grab bag has no idea what they are buying, but just assume it must be good because of the price and the reputation of the store.) A grab bag will have some good stuff, but overall it is usually a bad bargain because there will be a bunch of random crap that the purchaser doesn't need and would never bother to purchase separately.
But seriously....
Regarding Mr. Perfect vs. Mr. Not-So-Perfect
I have some very obvious strengths and some very obvious character flaws. I think some women like that they can hold onto my virtues, and feel comfortable about the reasons they are attracted to me, yet they also find comfort in my flaws. The advantage of obvious shortcomings is that the girl knows what she is getting and there is no secret double life under the surface. Meanwhile, six months later Mr. Perfect is arrested for having kiddie pr0n on his computer.
A kooky analogy
I have heard a few girls say that nice guys are like a grab bag. (A grab bag is when a bunch of random items are placed in a closed plain brown sack. A customer buying a grab bag has no idea what they are buying, but just assume it must be good because of the price and the reputation of the store.) A grab bag will have some good stuff, but overall it is usually a bad bargain because there will be a bunch of random crap that the purchaser doesn't need and would never bother to purchase separately.
