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Where can people make friends? I'm lonely.

lynx2051 said:
LOL, I am only being realistic. I mean do you ever see a 19 year old clubbing with someone in there early to mid thirties?
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why not? at psytrancers i see a huge spectrum of ages all the time and the crowd tends not to be so superficial that an age difference like that matters in that environment.

alasdair
 
It happens every weekend in many metropolitan areas all across the United States I'm sure.

:)

on topic:

Making friends is about being open to knowing people outside of any preconceived notions or spoon fed prejudices you've been instilled with.

You can make friends almost anywhere. You really can.




...
 
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alasdairm said:
why not? at psytrancers i see a huge spectrum of ages all the time and the crowd tends not to be so superficial that an age difference like that matters in that environment.

alasdair
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True enough. The parties I go to ... tons of ages ... from 19 to who knows what! People who have been in the scene for years! I am only 20 and have friends in their 30s ... I have no problem with it :)
That being said ... it is still easier to connect with people your own age, approximately. Still ... besides my bf who is 21 ... most of our friends are 24 - 27 ... that age.
Just saying ... don't limit it to age!
 
shahab6 said:
Do you facebook, found ur old friends or even classmate and start contacting them, start hanging out with them again. Ask them out for a drink. Start chatting with them a little bit, tell them ur bored and if there down to grab a drink.
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Exactly what i would do and have done. Just make it as simple and casual as that. You have to have some people around from highschool that you didnt really hang out with outside of school but were good friends in school. Going out for a drink is good and another good way to ask them to hang out is if you smoke weed. Its always easy to say hey man long time no see you trying to chill for a little and smoke some buds? Haha or anything really if your into videogames ask them if they want to game ya know. Another great way is sports. Get involved in some sports and you will def make friends.
 
lynx2051 said:
I am 19 (male) and I dropped out of college a few months ago, and now my friends are all off to uni so I'll be alone where I live. I've been to the gym a few times but most people like to keeping to themselves there. Does anyone know what type of clubs I could enjoy, I don't really have that many hobbies but I was looking online for these social groups, what are they like? Or if anyone has any other ideas, thanks.
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It would probably be helpful if you could list any of the hobbies you do have, or things that generally interest you. Music, nature, art, photography, reading, clubs, raves etc etc?
 
Beings said:
Grrr. I hate it when people say "it is so easy to make friends, just hit up parties and bars, and stuff".

It is easy if you already have friends and are often at outings meeting new people. If you are a loner, you dont really know of any parties happening as you need friends to invite you in the first place.
If you go to a bar alone, striking up conversations with randoms is significantly more difficult as others are usually in groups and you are by yourself. And people always give you "wtf you alone?" look.
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i find sitting at the bar and going out before bars get super packed helps. it helps to know a bit about the local sports team or current events to make small talk. i've had some awesome conversations going out to the bar alone. and as you frequent the same place again and again, you will see the same people. eventually some of them might turn into real friends.

OP, if you have a specific hobby or interest, try using a site like meetup.com to find people with similar interests.
 
i'm 21 and i hang around with people from age 17 up to age 50!! and these are friends i made all by myself.

i find drugs help me make loads of friends. forums are good especially when they are a smaller close knit community and from the same country.
 
I also have no in real life friends currently and I'm lonely, but I do have some remaining who just live far away that I met during my master's program in college. One of them is now almost 31, and I'm 24, and we had a damn good time clubbing, and both of us usually hate clubs too! But, yeah, age isn't as much a factor as common interest and some degree of maturity I think. It's hard to just got out and meet people when you don't know anyone, but at 19 I think it might be a bit easier than at my 24. Try to get involved in something, I ended up getting a job where I work alone so the option of work friends vanished for me too.
 
I think I'm going to sound like the most unsocial, mild person here (with people suggesting extreme sports, parties etc :P), but do you have any interests? Like I love rats, and there are a lot of rat communities round here, I've met tonnes of good friends through them. There are a lot of interest focus groups that turn out to be close-knit communities. Also, a lot of places are just begging for volunteers, which I've also made a lot of friends doing, plus I get to help people!! I'd honestly recommend it to anyone. Also with the volunteering thing, I volunteered for a drug policy reform group at one point, amazing because I got to do what I believed in and met incredibly like-minded people.

Those are the only two things I can think of... Good luck. :)
 
Good question, i have no idea.

I've always felt drawn towards people older then myself, i guess there life experience intrigues me..i lived with a good friend of mine for two years, he was 27 and i was 22. Its strange to think that as soon as i stepped out of the drug and party scene, i realized it was the centerpoint of my entire life along with all the people i had met through it.. having now shifted that centerpoint towards myself and contemplating on what exactly is important for me; my social life has become non-existent. I can manage been on my own for long periods of time.. but it's always nice to be in the company of good friends.
 
In response to an earlier post in the thread... any guy who's worried that talking to another guy they don't know will make them look gay is gonna have a hard time finding friends in general because they're too caught up in how they look to just be natural and ACTUALLY make friends. If another guy chats me up at the pub, my first thought is rarely "OMG HE'S GAY!" and even if it is... that's not a reason to cast someone off.

That's besides the point, however. My recommendation would be to attend some sort of large social event, not like a party or anything, but some sort of large scale public event. For lack of examples I'll just say a soccer game, or a parade, or something like that. Pick out someone who's wearing a shirt of a band you like and tell em you dig their shirt. Strike up conversation about that common interest and see where it goes. Either you'll find out you have lots in common other than that band... or you'll find that you have little in common, in which you just say "well have a good day" and be on your way. Nothing lost.

I can assure you that socializing isn't something that comes naturally or easy to me, but nobody knows that because I act like it does. In a perfect world, I'd never leave my house, I'd have few to no friends, and I'd not have to interact with people socially at all, but that's just not a realistic world, so I've chosen to adapt even if it makes me uncomfortable from time to time. You're not always going to ENJOY meeting new people, but you'll find people you enjoy after you DO meet them. You just have to take the initiative to say hi even if it makes you feel uncomfortable from time to time.

As an aside... RobotRipping... I absolutely love that username!
 
It's not that I mind making friends who are older than me, it's just easier to make friends your own age. To be honest I didn't have any real friends from school and had a pretty bad time there. College was the only place. I am off to this City Socalising thing on tuesday at some pub for new members, I'll see how it goes but I am really shy. It sounds sad but I was thinking of taking a benzo before going in just to make me more sociable. :\
 
I also have no in real life friends currently and I'm lonely, but I do have some remaining who just live far away that I met during my master's program in college. One of them is now almost 31, and I'm 24, and we had a damn good time clubbing, and both of us usually hate clubs too! But, yeah, age isn't as much a factor as common interest and some degree of maturity I think. It's hard to just got out and meet people when you don't know anyone, but at 19 I think it might be a bit easier than at my 24. Try to get involved in something, I ended up getting a job where I work alone so the option of work friends vanished for me too.
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Can I be your friend? :)
 
undead said:
In response to an earlier post in the thread... any guy who's worried that talking to another guy they don't know will make them look gay is gonna have a hard time finding friends in general because they're too caught up in how they look to just be natural and ACTUALLY make friends. If another guy chats me up at the pub, my first thought is rarely "OMG HE'S GAY!" and even if it is... that's not a reason to cast someone off.
!
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What guy goes to a club, and gets some random guys phone number?

I have never seen it happened. Also my point was most guys are not interested in making a friend at clubs. Most go to talk to other girls. And the ones that don't, usually come with a group of guys already.
I was not trying to be homophobic, I'm just talking about the reality of the situation. And my point was clubs are not the right place to find friends


Also back to the topic, you might want to take some classes at a community college, some simple easy class. That's another way to meet some people.

Iv made so many friends at community college.
 
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