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Film What's the Last Film You Saw? v. Tell Us What You Thought!

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Watched In the tall grass which was written by Stephen King and Joe Hill. Sadly I had a feeling right from the start that it wouldnt be a good movie and it turned out to be true. Stupid film..
3/5+. + cause it made me remember one of my old time favorites "The Triangle".
 
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I need to quote like Gengar, so am going with, 'great'.
😉

...also, 'gitter' didn't make a penny off it (the song) Nice little one, CE, eh? 😁
 
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Aftermath (1994) - 2 Stars - A mortuary worker does a graphic autopsy before sexually defiling the corpse. This was supposed to be gory and shocking, but really isn't. The autopsy itself is fake looking and somehow manages to be boring (if you wanna see a much better or more graphic scene of an autopsy, watch Saw IV or The Autopsy of Jane Doe: both are also vastly superior movies). The necrophilia scene at the end just comes across as silly.

The Green Inferno (AKA Cannibal Holocaust II) (1988 )- 2.5 stars - First off the alternate title is a fucking JOKE for many reasons; first of all this film has nothing to do with - and is not in any way connected to - Cannibal Holocaust. The movie also do not contain cannibals or even any references to cannibalism. It's is a VERY watered down version of the cannibal movies with very minimal gore. The movie is even uncut rated 15 in the UK (we are the strictest place in the world for movies and all other of these movies are heavily cut and still rated 18. Oddly, rather than showing scenes of animal cruelty, The Green Inferno actually shows compassion to animals, although it is clear the animals are at least somewhat distressed in the scenes they are in (constant, during the first half). It features "normal" people in the amazon coming in contact with a "primitive" tribe, which is the only thing that really links it to the sub-genre. I didn't get bored during this, but it brings now new and is basically a very tame version of so many similar movies. If you're interested in the genre - or the beautiful scenery - and the likes of Cannibal Holocaust and Cannibal Ferox are too much for you, I'd suggest giving this a try. Otherwise, it's not really worth it.

Bite Marks - 3.5 stars - pretty fun, homoerotic movie. A van driver picks up a gay couple hitchhiking to help him stay away while driving cross-country to deliver some coffins. The trio and up trapped in the van as vampires awaken from the coffins as night comes and they eventually have to fight off said vampires. Has it's funny (and sexy) moments but lacks a bit in the horror/gore moments for me. Decent movie that kept me entertained for 85 minutes on a boring morning.

Ravenous - 4 Stars - Plot twists ahoy so can't say too much about this one apart from it's set in the 1800's (during some American war with Mexico, I think?) where a small group of soldiers on an outpost save a man they find who tells them a tale of his (damn it, what are the groups of soldiers stationed together in a war called? The word evades me....but that, lol) and how they turned to cannibalism to survive and how he escape. Things escalate from there. Bloody and pretty enjoyable movie. I really liked it.
 
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Aftermath (1994) - 2 Stars - A mortuary worker does a graphic autopsy before sexually defiling the corpse. This was supposed to be gory and shocking, but really isn't. The autopsy itself is fake looking and somehow manages to be boring (if you wanna see a much better or more graphic scene of an autopsy, watch Saw IV or The Autopsy of Jane Doe: both are also vastly superior movies). The necrophilia scene at the end just comes across as silly.

The Green Inferno (AKA Cannibal Holocaust II) (1988 )- 2.5 stars - First off the alternate title is a fucking JOKE for many reasons; first of all this film has nothing to do with - and is not in any way connected to - Cannibal Holocaust. The movie also do not contain cannibals or even any references to cannibalism. It's is a VERY watered down version of the cannibal movies with very minimal gore. The movie is even uncut rated 15 in the UK (we are the strictest place in the world for movies and all other of these movies are heavily cut and still rated 18. Oddly, rather than showing scenes of animal cruelty, The Green Inferno actually shows compassion to animals, although it is clear the animals are at least somewhat distressed in the scenes they are in (constant, during the first half). It features "normal" people in the amazon coming in contact with a "primitive" tribe, which is the only thing that really links it to the sub-genre. I didn't get bored during this, but it brings now new and is basically a very tame version of so many similar movies. If you're interested in the genre - or the beautiful scenery - and the likes of Cannibal Holocaust and Cannibal Ferox are too much for you, I'd suggest giving this a try. Otherwise, it's not really worth it.

Bite Marks - 3.5 stars - pretty fun, homoerotic movie. A van driver picks up a gay couple hitchhiking to help him stay away while driving cross-country to deliver some coffins. The trio and up trapped in the van as vampires awaken from the coffins as night comes and they eventually have to fight off said vampires. Has it's funny (and sexy) moments but lacks a bit in the horror/gore moments for me. Decent movie that kept me entertained for 85 minutes on a boring morning.

Ravenous - 4 Stars - Plot twists ahoy so can't say too much about this one apart from it's set in the 1800's (during some American war with Mexico, I think?) where a small group of soldiers on an outpost save a man they find who tells them a tale of his (damn it, what are the groups of soldiers stationed together in a war called? The word evades me....but that, lol) and how they turned to cannibalism to survive and how he escape. Things escalate from there. Bloody and pretty enjoyable movie. I really liked it.
Ha so weird! I actually own a copy of CH and was talking about it recently. Good stuff.
 
The Lighthouse (2019)

Talk about an arthouse film. I mean, this defines it. It disturbed, amused, confused, and really had me questioning what I was seeing. The amount of detail and effort put into it really sold it. Defoe and Pattinson in rare form, honestly the best acting I've seen out of either of them.

No idea what I was supposed to get from it, but it sure as hell kept me riveted.


7.5/10 (I wana give it an 8 but it just... I dunno, it was TOO arthouse in the end)
 
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Mean Streets

I don't understand the point of this film. *spoilers ahead you've been warned* The whole thing revolves around Harvey Keitel's character trying to look after DeNiro's character, who is a little bitch to be quite frank. And that's all it is really. Some mobsters getting in scuffles. And eventually DeNiro's character is such an annoying little bitch that no matter what Keitel's character does, he cannot save him, and DeNiro gets his comeuppance. Get's shot multiple times and bleeds to death for being a right prick, and in the process gets his poor cousin and Keitel injured in a car wreck. I mean wtf did I watch?

Martin Scorsese criticized Marvel films recently for having no substance; I agree, they're absolute garbage (yet Disney won't put out more Star Wars? Fuck you Disney, and fuck society for funding these 3-5 per year shitty Marvel films!)... But that's rich coming from Scorsese, considering how many of his films are simply pointless gangster crime flicks with no meaning. Taxi Driver was his high point. I identified with Taxi Driver and to me it was commentary on the decay of society and the nature of loneliness. But otherwise, he's a flat director.

It was pointless, and I couldn't stand DeNiro's character. At least it was well filmed. Doesn't make up for the lack of a plot and no real point or message in the film. As silly, meaningless, and dry as any of the latest garbage Marvel films he said were as such.

5/10
 
Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals - Fuck me is this terrible! Two very brief gore scenes are pretty decent but otherwise very boring. Being an "Emanuelle" (she of the erotic film fare) movie the first 2/3rds is just soft core porn. Not that I have a problem with that but it's really boring, unsexy sex, despite Emanuelle herself being pretty hot. By the time the action did start I just didn't care anymore and it wasn't worth it anyway. I watched this 3 days ago and remember almost none of it it was so generic. Give this entry a miss. Plot? What plot?

Laura Gemser was the best "Emanuelle". I don't know if she was in this one or not but I'm assuming she was, lol [edit: yep, she was in it]. She was definitely beautiful and she came across as a genuine and nice person in the interviews I've seen with her

I miss the old terrible Italian schlock from the 70s. IMO "Anthropophagus: the Grim Reaper" was the best entry in d'Amato's catalogue, but I haven't seen it in forever...I should revisit some terrible Italian 70s movies
 
Between two ferns: the movie 4.5/5 The comedy interviewer goes to a road trip to interview people while still filming all scenes in a single location

Best comedy film Ive seen in a long time.
 
Tusk - 2 tusks out of 5 - this actually could have been good. But it seems like it just couldn't decide whether it wanted to be funny or wanted to be disturbing. There were definitely scenes where I could tell it had the potential to be both, but it ultimately was neither. A sort-of take on The Human Centipede, Tusk could have been titled "The Human Walrus". I enjoyed the banter in the first 10 minutes but by half-way through I found myself wishing I hadn't bothered with this. Meh. Not worth a 100+ minute movie for a total of about 15-20 mins of interesting moments.
 
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