Me...i've had a tough coupla weeks. Last weekend I wrecked my car...clipped a guardrail...hit a curb, blew out two tires, and generally fucked it up. And I don't even know if i can come up with the $500 deductible. And rent and about $5oo dollars worth o' bills are gonna come right behind it in a coupla weeks. On a side note a girl I really liked and was supposed to go out with blew me off earlier the same night...never called.
After making excuses the next day, she made another date for thursday though...saying she 'really did wanna hang out'. Seemed sincere.
Wed. She backs out of date for thursday citing prior commitments she'd forgot about.
Cut to this past friday. I have another date set for said girl for when I get off at ten. When i try to call her at around 9:30 no answer. So I try to call a mutual friend, we'll call him Ant, to get her cell number I left at home...no answer on his phone. So I call home and get it from the roommate. Try it ...no answer. So I wait a bit and try again...this time she answers. Said she didn't hear...it was in the other room..."but funny...doesn't say i missed a call."
But here comes the kicker. She's at Ant's house. As a matter of fact...they've been out together all night, dinner..and now they're chillin' at his house. And both ignoring my calls I might add. Now both of them have on separate occasions told me they are nothing more than friends...'like brother and sister' they say...so I take this in stride and ask if we're still hangin' out. She seems aloof but says yeah sure come on by. Cut to 45 minutes later..i'm off work and i go by. Nothing on in the livin room...no one in sight. Knock once, no answer. wait. Knock again...oh wait...here they come poppin down the hall out of Ant's bedroom...which is dark with nothin on but a lil music and about a zillion candles .
At this point things are lookin shady. But I play it off as they quickly come up with some little project to move a couch or something. At some point Ant casually leans in his room and blows out the candles and kinda shuts the door. Then we play pool....meanwhile gals completely ignoring me. Then Ant makes some sly little comment about how she's '
definatelty a girl'...and they share some little smirk.(btw...this is sort've a reference to our little inside joke that she's a guy in a girls body..FYI) Right the fuck in front of me! Then i notice as she's playin pool...she's keeps havin ta kinda hike and adjust her pants. As as they ride a lil low once i realize it's because she's not wearing underwear. At this point both of them are playin it off....and i'm starting ta feel like shit. I begin pouring the beer down.
Now at this point I should have just left. I know it. But over the last few weeks me and this girl had talked a lot...shared a few kisses, and to be honest she's the first girl i'd allowed myself to like in some time now(read over a year). She was
supposed to be different. She talked a good game about how she was. I was suddenly confronted with the fact that she now most probably wasn't. And I was drawn to it like a trainwreck. For some reason I felt compelled to stick it out and watch it die. So I went for the less pretty option. I got drunker and drunker as the night went on( we went out to a strip club for a bit)....and then eventually I asked her what was up.
I got the answer I expected but didn't want to hear. She didn't know if we should see each other anymore...except maybe as friends. She vehemently denied that fact her and Ant had done anything though. Said she just 'didn't know why nobody believes me and Ant aren't fuckin around'. But considering the earlier situation...I find this hard to believe. I'm in full on drunk(about 10-14 beers) and self-pity mode at this point unfortunately. I had really liked this girl; and for a few weeks she had called
me all the time, and talked about infactuated she was with me. It's the only reason i had begun to open up. She seemed so sincere. And just like that...over. The conversation just degenerated from here...then ended, awkwardly.
And a final kicker before it's done. While we're all at Ant's about 5 in the am...she gets a call from her apartment. She lives alone. But apparently yet another guy she had said she was no longer seein' was in her apartment lookin for her. And when my drunken ass got home that morning my roommate tells me said guy even called my house lookin for her. wtf?
In summary...on a night she was supposed to be going out with me: She's got a drunk guy at home in her bed callin numbers off her phone looking for her, she goes out with and presumably hooks up with a friend before I get off...and brazenly walks out of his bedroom and plays it off, then she tells me we should maybe just be friends...she'll call me in a week or two. Ouch.
To top all of this off....my job sucks as well. And i woke up sick this morning.
So what's goin on in my life? Shit. Lots of it. And it only seems to be getting deeper.
P.S. Sorry for the rant...at first this wasn't gonna include so much about the bitch...but it just came out.