🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 What Was YOUR Nightly Fix? v. Smoking the Midnight Oil

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Sucks that the sr-17018 isn't a magic bullet, but I am glad to see the diazepam with PG is working!

Oh yeah it does (PG)! And well, SR-17018 is a research drug so I'll keep researching... Maybe I dosed to low to keep me emotionally stable... There's too many questions still..

Seems like a lot of people in this thread are going through some serious shit lately... I just want to say my heart goes out to you all and I will hold some positive thoughts for you. even though I don't know any of you I value seeing everybody's posts, they really bring me up when I am down and I hope my posts can do the same. I don't exactly know what I'm trying to say here except that, in the words of Winston Churchill, "when going through hell, keep going."

I love that one

As for me, I am taking a little tolerance break from a lot of drugs, so tonight it is just:
A shit ton of gabapentin
A shit ton of pizza

I nearly ate a whole pizza and I am not exactly a big dude, so it was impressive. I also ate enough gabapentin to visit gaba town when I close my eyes. Gaba town is a fascinating place to explore, but I think the gabapentin was also the culprit that caused me to fall asleep on the toilet. Oops.

And welcome to the toilet sleepers club LoL ... Happens too often to me

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Feeling empty, numbing myself with nicotine, sex and attention only works for a moment.

What makes you want to numb yourself out? No need to reply, but my DM is always open...

Part of me misses the real drugs sometimes, I crave going completely off the rails and going fucking crazy, losing myself to the lifestyle again and the simplicity of just living to get high every day.

Oh damn... I feel that a lot... Though ofc it's an illusion and no drug can stop the pain for too long...
Last night I got drunk for once plus the minimum of SR-17018 to stay out of WD... This morning my head reminded me of the fact that every buzz has it's price. It's just so direct with alcohol... And I'm convinced that's a major reason why it's socially acceptable ---

Anyways just smoking a bunch of cigarettes tonight, feeling some type of way, ODing on opiates doesnt sound so bad right now

Well that sounds VERY bad to me... from someone who managed to stay clean for that long especially.
Also every even near-OD is painful at least for me... makes me shiver thinking of it
I'm sure you got your reasons but please stay safe yourself okay?

 

[TheLightBringer]

What makes you want to numb yourself out? No need to reply, but my DM is always open...

Had to rewrite it because I feel like it reveals too much about my identity irl, but mental health issues and a connective tissue disorder causing chronic pain and injuries. I might DM you later

Oh damn... I feel that a lot... Though ofc it's an illusion and no drug can stop the pain for too long...
Last night I got drunk for once plus the minimum of SR-17018 to stay out of WD... This morning my head reminded me of the fact that every buzz has it's price. It's just so direct with alcohol... And I'm convinced that's a major reason why it's socially acceptable ---

the sad truth, the most it can do is make me pretend for a moment. Better to become strong and stoic and able to be happy without the drugs, altough its hard as fuck sometimes.

Well that sounds VERY bad to me... from someone who managed to stay clean for that long especially.
Also every even near-OD is painful at least for me... makes me shiver thinking of it
I'm sure you got your reasons but please stay safe yourself okay?

Hope youre staying safe as well friend

 

[Psychlone Jack]

31mg methadone
50mg testosterone IM
Joint of Durban Poison

Morning dose postponed to this afternoon, working a late shift tonight.

 

[paranoid android]

5 7.5 mg zopiclone

 

[Huba]

I chew nicotine gum and dwell on being 100% sober. I went so far down the rabbit hole with drugs and alcohol that its lost all its magic and deep down inside I know it will just bring me more pain. I did have lots of fun lost in my 20's. In my 20's I could drink mint schnapps till I puked and wake up feeling fine the next day. Not anymore.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

31mg methadone
50mg testosterone IM
Joint of Durban Poison

Morning dose postponed to this afternoon, working a late shift tonight.

I keep wondering about the current TRT hype - is it really worth?

 

[Psychlone Jack]

I keep wondering about the current TRT hype - is it really worth?

For me, absolutely. Huge boost to mental health and "vitality" if you will.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

For me, absolutely. Huge boost to mental health and "vitality" if you will.

Mental health!! Interesting! I even read somewhere it can be somewhat addictive... Now I'm really curious about how @Sp4rky is feeling about that?

 

[Sp4rky]

Mental health!! Interesting! I even read somewhere it can be somewhat addictive... Now I'm really curious about how @Sp4rky is feeling about that?

Oohh that’s interesting! I have heard that for some biological men it is kinda addictive in the way steroids are I suppose. For me it hasn’t given me a massive energy boost, definitely slightly higher libido, but nothing crazy, have always been very situational on that part I suppose.

Since the first of month of starting testosterone, I have noticed feeling slightly more ‘comfortable’ in my own brain almost? I’ve also always been massively conflict avoidant and I so far have found T to kind of help with that, has me leaning more towards fight, rather than freeze response if you will, easier to stand up for myself and also feel more protective over my friends for example.

Only part I dislike so far (like 3.5 months on testosterone now??), is the oily skin, made some of my healing piercings get annoyed more quickly and also acne, which is fair because you are putting your body through another puberty in a sense.

For me it’s quite complicated though, as I also am chronically ill, including many hormonal changes with estrogen. There’s very little research on my syndrome in general , but my doctors have noted the % of trans people is way higher for people with my syndrome than compared to the general population, so the ‘feeling more comfortable’ could be both because my brain was better wired for testosterone or because hrt has been helping my gender dysphoria greatly, thus also leading to me feeling more comfortable in general.

I find it a fascinating subject really. In a sense I’d say yeah, it can be ‘addictive’ in the sense that many trans people I know who are getting hrt, are generally way happier and more comfortable in their bodies while on it, and your body eventually gets used to certain hormone levels, so in a sense yes I suppose, but no in the way of addiction often being associated with a spiral where your life only revolves around this one thing.

 

[ind33d]

30mg THC/30mg CBD as live resin, PO
120mg DXM
4mg chlorpheniramine
0.25mg street fentanyl, IN
3600mg valerian 10:1 extract
50mg melatonin
~0.4g Tahoe OG, spliff
Vaped nicotine @ 2,4%

 

[Gridlink]

30mg THC/30mg CBD as live resin, PO
120mg DXM
4mg chlorpheniramine
0.25mg street fentanyl, IN
3600mg valerian 10:1 extract
50mg melatonin
~0.4g Tahoe OG, spliff
Vaped nicotine @ 2,4%

Your spelling is still fine, so you evidently haven't had enough DXM!

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Oohh that’s interesting! I have heard that for some biological men it is kinda addictive in the way steroids are I suppose. For me it hasn’t given me a massive energy boost, definitely slightly higher libido, but nothing crazy, have always been very situational on that part I suppose.

Since the first of month of starting testosterone, I have noticed feeling slightly more ‘comfortable’ in my own brain almost? I’ve also always been massively conflict avoidant and I so far have found T to kind of help with that, has me leaning more towards fight, rather than freeze response if you will, easier to stand up for myself and also feel more protective over my friends for example.

Only part I dislike so far (like 3.5 months on testosterone now??), is the oily skin, made some of my healing piercings get annoyed more quickly and also acne, which is fair because you are putting your body through another puberty in a sense.

For me it’s quite complicated though, as I also am chronically ill, including many hormonal changes with estrogen. There’s very little research on my syndrome in general , but my doctors have noted the % of trans people is way higher for people with my syndrome than compared to the general population, so the ‘feeling more comfortable’ could be both because my brain was better wired for testosterone or because hrt has been helping my gender dysphoria greatly, thus also leading to me feeling more comfortable in general.

I find it a fascinating subject really. In a sense I’d say yeah, it can be ‘addictive’ in the sense that many trans people I know who are getting hrt, are generally way happier and more comfortable in their bodies while on it, and your body eventually gets used to certain hormone levels, so in a sense yes I suppose, but no in the way of addiction often being associated with a spiral where your life only revolves around this one thing.

Thank you for your openness and great information!!
.. hmm... It's not like I was thinking about myself in this but guess I should personally absolutely stay away from anything that would increase the fight response even more
Also everything you wrote is totally making sense. It's appreciated

And I wonder now what the psychological effect of estrogen would be - but it's probably a bit more complicated on the female side

 

[Gridlink]

Tonight's fix is kinda limited, I am still taking my tolerance break from most things. So I've done:

Methadone
Gabapentin
Usual boring psych meds

I also went on a long walk with my doggo. She tends to pull a lot, especially when she sees/smells/hearss other pupsters, so a walk kinda equates to a full body workout. I noticed too that the walk seemed to make the gabapentin hit harder and come on sooner than it usually would. I wonder if it's a placebo, but I am buzzing hard from a small amount of pills so maybe not? I keep getting sidetracked while writing this because whenever I close my eyes I get great CEVs. So I may as well post this, shut my eyes again, and enjoy the trip through the portal to Gabatown.

Oh, right. I meant to ask, anyone here try tuci? I have the opportunity to do some but I wonder if it's any good?

 

[paranoid android]

15mg zopiclone

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Tonight's fix is kinda limited, I am still taking my tolerance break from most things. So I've done:

Methadone
Gabapentin
Usual boring psych meds

I also went on a long walk with my doggo. She tends to pull a lot, especially when she sees/smells/hearss other pupsters, so a walk kinda equates to a full body workout. I noticed too that the walk seemed to make the gabapentin hit harder and come on sooner than it usually would. I wonder if it's a placebo, but I am buzzing hard from a small amount of pills so maybe not? I keep getting sidetracked while writing this because whenever I close my eyes I get great CEVs. So I may as well post this, shut my eyes again, and enjoy the trip through the portal to Gabatown.

There's a name for drugs hitting harder in unfamiliar settings... I forgor...

Oh, right. I meant to ask, anyone here try tuci? I have the opportunity to do some but I wonder if it's any good?

Asked a similar question here once and the answer was " it's the opposite of harm reduction" ( as it's by definition an unquantified mix of not clearly defined substances, usually 2c-b, Ket and whatever, untestable for ordinary users). I even asked a vendor once about the exact content and they couldn't say... So No. Clearly.

On my end after being stable on SR-17018 for..3 days I tried to reduce my doses from 3x 20 to 3x 13 mg (as I was already in the lower dose range I thought I could ). It worked during the day but at night I got another lesson - which is why I'm awake since 4:45 a.m on a holiday (sweating and diarrhea) and can't sleep anymore despite redosing.

I found some very good info on reddit finally - will write a separate post on this - and I can confirm that:
+ maintainance dose should be taken for no less than 4 days
+ The difference between doses from 10 - 25 mg is much bigger than from 25 - 50 mg ( than from 50-100 mg with a ceiling effect around 100 mg which I didn't test myself though).
+ It takes hours to fully kick in. (Only redose after 2 hours minimum during calibration phase)

So yeah... Good morning everyone...

 

[Gridlink]

There's a name for drugs hitting harder in unfamiliar settings... I forgor...

Asked a similar question here once and the answer was " it's the opposite of harm reduction" ( as it's by definition an unquantified mix of not clearly defined substances, usually 2c-b, Ket and whatever, untestable for ordinary users). I even asked a vendor once about the exact content and they couldn't say... So No. Clearly.

On my end after being stable on SR-17018 for..3 days I tried to reduce my doses from 3x 20 to 3x 13 mg (as I was already in the lower dose range I thought I could ). It worked during the day but at night I got another lesson - which is why I'm awake since 4:45 a.m on a holiday (sweating and diarrhea) and can't sleep anymore despite redosing.

I found some very good info on reddit finally - will write a separate post on this - and I can confirm that:
+ maintainance dose should be taken for no less than 4 days
+ The difference between doses from 10 - 25 mg is much bigger than from 25 - 50 mg ( than from 50-100 mg with a ceiling effect around 100 mg which I didn't test myself though).
+ It takes hours to fully kick in. (Only redose after 2 hours minimum during calibration phase)

So yeah... Good morning everyone...

I think situational tolerance is the term? I am a testament to it being a real thing. For example, at my dealer's house I am so used to doing certain drugs there that I will barely feel them...until I leave, and then it's like, "holy shit, I didn't realize I was this fucked up!" Actually, I get the same effect at my own house.

That is interesting that the SR-17018 didn't alleviate the withdrawals after redosing. I wonder why not...? Maybe it is related to the long latency time between dose and effect. Or maybe not.

Tonight my tolerance break is over, but at the moment I am not really in the mood to get high,, so I might just go with sobriety.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

That is interesting that the SR-17018 didn't alleviate the withdrawals after redosing. I wonder why not...? Maybe it is related to the long latency time between dose and effect. Or maybe not.

I think it is. Also whenever I get into WD it takes more than a standard dose to get out, and since I only returned to the dose I had before + a little insecurity ( need to recalibrate my balance ), well.. it took too long. Bad luck but a good reminder...

Today I felt the need to redose faster than before, 4 insted of 3 times a day... So I definitely didn't do myself a favor . But ok. Imo I'm still looking better than a week ago... Christmas Eve is over for us now and I was otherwise stable, so that's good ( two glasses of wine and 2x 20 mg SR-17018 over the evening - I think it's fine)

... Merry peaceful Christmas to everyone!

 

[Gridlink]

Last night after Christmas festivities were done, my dealer texted me to tell me he had some presents for me. So I go over there and I received:
Fentanyl
Methamphetamine
A groovy hat (I needed a new one)
A mushroom notebook (in reference to my learning to cultivate them - it's legal where I live)

So late last night I took some of the drugs and copied my cultivation notes into the notebook, feels good to have them all in one place.

Hope everybody had a great Christmas!

 

[Deleted member 578389]

just the right amount of meth

now how tf do u sleep using this drug >.>

bender for 3 days, recover for 3?