🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 What Was YOUR Morning Fix? v. I Smoke Weed, Eat Yogurt

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Need an extra fat dose today as the day started absolutely shitty. One more letter from the job center and I'm going to blow that building the fuck up!

- πŸ’‰ 4.2ml Polamidon πŸ’‰
- Death Metal all day long. If anybody knocks on my door and complains I'm gonna bite off their head, shit it out and put the skull on my front door! Fuck people!
Speaking of people:
 
You ever tried the black domina strain? I actually don't like weed but this strain feels so beautifully narcotic, I fell in love with it. Put me to sleep in an instant and gave me the heaviest body high I ever experienced. You gotta try it my mate...

LOOOOVE Black Domina, one of my favorite land race indicas, right up there with Romulan, purely for that narcotic, sedating effect. I've nodded off those strains harder than some heroin lol.

As for my morning fix...

16mg bupe
4mg ondansetron
3 cups strong black coffee

Out for an early walk as I won't have time later due to lame adult stuff, about to stop by the pond and twist up a nice L here in a minute.

You know, mental health and all that. 🫠

Have a good one, y'all. πŸ‘
 
This morning
I make the weekly drive to the clinic for my take homes I live in rural Ohio , takes 20 mins to get to Columbus,( the city)
70 mg methadone ( first of 162 split dose/ 92 mg pm)
Few bowls of my home grown ice cream cake
Topped with melt bubble I made last night lol couldn't help it
Lucky Reds cigs
Coffee black
Then Back home back to trimming
 
20mg valium
Cigs
Coffee
Still undecided on if i'll add codeine into the mix, it means WDs if I don't but kinda sick of the opiate hampster wheel... or maybe I'll taper. Hoping to score some hash later today after a 6 month+ hiatus
 
A very discombobulated morning after some mushrooms last night... Getting my wits about me slowly, though, with the usual - caffeine, nicotine, thc. Too early for the bupe yet, but it is coming, of course. Just you wait.

@BK38 I'm with you, but beyond sick of the opioid rat race. It's fucked up, and of course 100% on me for allowing too many "extras" on top of my usual maintenence dose, but now I'm in the dilemma of either having to go up in dose, which I don't want to do and is now complicated anyway because j just switched to a private doctor, or basically beginning my taper NOW, and with a much rockier start than I'd like. I got too much going on for this shit right now lol.
 
@BK38 I'm with you, but beyond sick of the opioid rat race. It's fucked up, and of course 100% on me for allowing too many "extras" on top of my usual maintenence dose, but now I'm in the dilemma of either having to go up in dose, which I don't want to do and is now complicated anyway because j just switched to a private doctor, or basically beginning my taper NOW, and with a much rockier start than I'd like. I got too much going on for this shit right now lol.
Yeah, it's the PAWS that always gets me. I'm only scripted 60mg codeine per day, but have been taking them daily at dosages ranging from 120mg to 180mg and basically burning through my script like a wildfire. I have a 3 month script but can only pick up my codeine/valium for 1 month at a time. I'm thinking I might take like 90mg today, 60mg the next and then 30mg the next or just jump off CT. The acute WDs don't phase me that much (considering I used to be a pretty heavy Heroin addict), it's the anxiety and depression that comes after that 5 days-week of pain that fucks me. I need to start exercising and eating right. If I can just keep to valium at reasonable doses and have a spliff or two of hash a day I'll be content. Then eventually I'll want to start on the slow and painful benzo taper (don't want benzo handcuffs for life).
 
@Psychlone Jack
Hey Jack, have you considered switching to methadone? I have often noticed that subs don't really hold up many people as it is not a full agonist, which the brain actually craves, and that often causes people on them to go for extra stuff and relapse because their brain doesn't feel fully satiated. There is always that feeling that something is lacking. I wish you guys in the states had the option to opt for things like morphine or Levomethadone, but if subs really suck for you then maybe try Methadone.

Btw, I have seen your pic on the selfie thread and for some reason you remind me of Chester Bennington which I think is really cool :cool:. Rest In Peace btw. I miss him.
 
Yeah, it's the PAWS that always gets me. I'm only scripted 60mg codeine per day, but have been taking them daily at dosages ranging from 120mg to 180mg and basically burning through my script like a wildfire. I have a 3 month script but can only pick up my codeine/valium for 1 month at a time. I'm thinking I might take like 90mg today, 60mg the next and then 30mg the next or just jump off CT. The acute WDs don't phase me that much (considering I used to be a pretty heavy Heroin addict), it's the anxiety and depression that comes after that 5 days-week of pain that fucks me. I need to start exercising and eating right. If I can just keep to valium at reasonable doses and have a spliff or two of hash a day I'll be content. Then eventually I'll want to start on the slow and painful benzo taper (don't want benzo handcuffs for life).

Man, the acute withdrawals don't look that bad sometimes lol... used to be a grams-daily heroin addict myself. I'm on 16mg bupe a day, and I've cold turkeyed off of this dose before, unwillingly of course and it was hell, but i did it. I sometimes toy with the idea of taking the time off of both my jobs just to hole up and do a trainspotting style kick. Totally unrealistic, if only from a who's gonna pay the bills standpoint. Thus, life kinda makes the taper mandatory. Sumbitch lol.

Hats off on wanting to get free of the benzos too, man. Thankfully that's one thing I never did become dependent on, but that's only because once I started taking them I started fucking up so fast, I was like you know, probably shouldn't do these lol. Still, took about 6 arrests in a 3 month period lol
 
Man, the acute withdrawals don't look that bad sometimes lol... used to be a grams-daily heroin addict myself. I'm on 16mg bupe a day, and I've cold turkeyed off of this dose before, unwillingly of course and it was hell, but i did it. I sometimes toy with the idea of taking the time off of both my jobs just to hole up and do a trainspotting style kick. Totally unrealistic, if only from a who's gonna pay the bills standpoint. Thus, life kinda makes the taper mandatory. Sumbitch lol.

Hats off on wanting to get free of the benzos too, man. Thankfully that's one thing I never did become dependent on, but that's only because once I started taking them I started fucking up so fast, I was like you know, probably shouldn't do these lol. Still, took about 6 arrests in a 3 month period lol
Yeah, I got a clean rap sheet and and want to keep it that way. Sounds like you and bnz don't mix well. I used methadone and diazepam to get off the H. 12 years clean now though. Best of luck with your taper.
 
@Psychlone Jack
Hey Jack, have you considered switching to methadone? I have often noticed that subs don't really hold up many people as it is not a full agonist, which the brain actually craves, and that often causes people on them to go for extra stuff and relapse because their brain doesn't feel fully satiated. There is always that feeling that something is lacking. I wish you guys in the states had the option to opt for things like morphine or Levomethadone, but if subs really suck for you then maybe try Methadone.

Btw, I have seen your pic on the selfie thread and for some reason you remind me of Chester Bennington which I think is really cool :cool:. Rest In Peace btw. I miss him.


Hah, Chester Bennington, that's a first. I'll take that as a complement, thank you. πŸ™‚

Honestly I have thought about switching to methadone, but I'm still not sure how I feel about it. My biggest thing is, here in the States, for any kind of OUD application, you can't get it as a take-home prescription. You have to go to a clinic every day, at least starting out, and take it at a direct-observation window. The big logistical hangup this was creating in my life was the reason I just started getting my bupe from an online pharmacy. On top of that, there's several hours of mandatory classes every week, as well as mandatory counseling. They make it free, but incredibly inconvenient.

All that said, if it doesn't work it doesn't work. And right now doesn't appear to be working.
 
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