Vent/Rant Thread vs I'll tell you how I really feel (Triggering Content)

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I haven't really eaten much in 4-5 days. I need a job. All I've eaten the last few days is what people have offered to me, which isn't much because I never ask. Negative 2 dollars in my bank account. I hadn't asked my dad for any money in a few weeks so when I talked to him yesterday I mentioned I need to get some groceries and he said he'd make a deposit today. He didn't, and I really have no right to complain. I'm 22 years old... it's my problem at this point not his.

Plus I do have a bag of brown rice. I should stop bitching and just eat some fucking rice. Some people would kill for that.


Good thing I don't have anybody to waste money on for valentines day. Considering I don't have any to waste even if I wanted to and like scag said it would just make me look like an asshole.
I'm sorry to hear about the position you're in. :( have you tried food banks? They really really helped me when I had nothing. I'm sure if you opened up to your family they would understand. Let us know how it goes and how you are doing please! People care.

And yes, valentines day. One of the cheesiest, most commercial days of the year and also my birthday! :P it's actually been the first birthday where I haven't been single, depressed or alone. My boyfriend is lovely, mad respect for him going the extra mile and buying me a Polaroid camera as well as lovely hippy dippy decorations.

I hope everyone had a nice day x
 
uh... Hope I'm in the right place for this... :!FUCK ALL OF THIS FUCKING ICE AND SNOW AND RAIN FOR WEEKS ON END!! I'm clean of opes and TRYING My damnedest to stay that way but it seems like god is just flushing a toilet of half-frozen dopesick vomit milkshake all over this state ritenow and it's making it a hell of allot harder for me to stay clean!!! And for fuck's sake, FUCK BEING AWAKE FOR A BA-FUCKING-JILLION HOURS WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO!!! FUCK BEING WITHOUT A JOB FOR ALMOST 2 MONTHS NOW!!! FUCK CLICKING THIS GOT DAMNED MOUSE AND LISTENING TO SAME OLD MUSIC AND WATCHING SAME FUCKING SHOWS AND FEELING LIKE AN ABSOLUTE JACK-ASS FOR NOT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING EVER AND FUCK THIS STINKIN' ASS DOG SITTING UNDER MY PC DESK LIKE IT'S HIS DOG-HOUSE INSTEAD OF MY LEG-HOUSE!! I HATE THAT DOG....ah, he's alright I guess...but FUCK THIS FUCKING SNOW AND DAMN-IT, I NEED TO GET LAID FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 6 MONTHS!!! lmao, I'm actually feeling much better after typing all of this! thank's blue!=D
 
^ Congrats on getting clean.

Let's break this down...what can you control, and what can you not control? You cannot control the weather. But that's about it. What are you doing to look for work? Are you doing anything to try and meet a sex partner? Why don't you try and complete a couple applications today, and perhaps message a female you know (or want to get to know)? And you can probably section the dog off to another part of your home?
 
uh... Hope I'm in the right place for this... :!FUCK ALL OF THIS FUCKING ICE AND SNOW AND RAIN FOR WEEKS ON END!! I'm clean of opes and TRYING My damnedest to stay that way but it seems like god is just flushing a toilet of half-frozen dopesick vomit milkshake all over this state ritenow and it's making it a hell of allot harder for me to stay clean!!! And for fuck's sake, FUCK BEING AWAKE FOR A BA-FUCKING-JILLION HOURS WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO!!! FUCK BEING WITHOUT A JOB FOR ALMOST 2 MONTHS NOW!!! FUCK CLICKING THIS GOT DAMNED MOUSE AND LISTENING TO SAME OLD MUSIC AND WATCHING SAME FUCKING SHOWS AND FEELING LIKE AN ABSOLUTE JACK-ASS FOR NOT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING EVER AND FUCK THIS STINKIN' ASS DOG SITTING UNDER MY PC DESK LIKE IT'S HIS DOG-HOUSE INSTEAD OF MY LEG-HOUSE!! I HATE THAT DOG....ah, he's alright I guess...but FUCK THIS FUCKING SNOW AND DAMN-IT, I NEED TO GET LAID FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 6 MONTHS!!! lmao, I'm actually feeling much better after typing all of this! thank's blue!=D

Well done on getting clean.
 
uh... Hope I'm in the right place for this... :!FUCK ALL OF THIS FUCKING ICE AND SNOW AND RAIN FOR WEEKS ON END!! I'm clean of opes and TRYING My damnedest to stay that way but it seems like god is just flushing a toilet of half-frozen dopesick vomit milkshake all over this state ritenow and it's making it a hell of allot harder for me to stay clean!!! And for fuck's sake, FUCK BEING AWAKE FOR A BA-FUCKING-JILLION HOURS WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO!!! FUCK BEING WITHOUT A JOB FOR ALMOST 2 MONTHS NOW!!! FUCK CLICKING THIS GOT DAMNED MOUSE AND LISTENING TO SAME OLD MUSIC AND WATCHING SAME FUCKING SHOWS AND FEELING LIKE AN ABSOLUTE JACK-ASS FOR NOT DOING ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING EVER AND FUCK THIS STINKIN' ASS DOG SITTING UNDER MY PC DESK LIKE IT'S HIS DOG-HOUSE INSTEAD OF MY LEG-HOUSE!! I HATE THAT DOG....ah, he's alright I guess...but FUCK THIS FUCKING SNOW AND DAMN-IT, I NEED TO GET LAID FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 6 MONTHS!!! lmao, I'm actually feeling much better after typing all of this! thank's blue!=D

That was an A+ rant/vent if I ever saw one. Feel better for having gotten it out?=D
 
I'm feeling fucking betrayed and pulled by a damn string like a damn puppet.

I hate how people give you their word and they have nothing to show for it, fuck em'.
 
I'm feeling fucking betrayed and pulled by a damn string like a damn puppet.

I hate how people give you their word and they have nothing to show for it, fuck em'.

Sorry you feel that way. It's not nice when a person betrays you but as hard as it is, try to remember that there are others who are honest and do care about you. Have you told the person how you are feeling?

Now for my rant (being British I love a good moan hehe)

Kinda annoyed at myself - I've taken a lower dose of my medication last few days and didn't realize this. See I had this "ace" idea of taken my full dose in the morning and my half dose in the evening. Thought I'd taken these but today I woke up in one FOUL mood; angry, irritable, in tears, felt empty, didn't get out my dressing gown n just could not be bothered to do anything, snapping at anyone over the slightest thing.....

Thought you were not meant to feel anything going from a higher dose to a slightly lower dose I'm extremely furious with myself.... A whole day wasted feeling like I used to n acting how I used to........ God knows I'm I'm gna be when I actually COME OFF my medication... :(
 
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Everyone is just pissing me off today :|

((((addy)))) I've that day today... I've snapped at literally everyone n been in my dressing gown all day then realised I've only been taken a lower dose of my medication and not my full dose for days, no wonder....
You know where I am if you need someone to talk to, ok or even if you vent it out all here, we'll listen n not judge you. I despise those sorts of days...

How are you in terms of the opiates? Are you still taking them? Is it still problematic???

Evey :) xxxx
 
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Well, this morning has been terrible.

I awoke at 2 with the fastest case of racing thoughts that I have ever experienced. Some of them were in another language that I did not understand. They weren't my own thoughts. I was correlating all sorts of things to other things with no sense at all. I felt delirious. I could see the shapes of pale faces and hands in the darkness. It was not until 2:30 that I felt coherent enough to try to speak. I threw a lot of words at the unfortunate nurse at the door, but I think she somehow got the idea. We went to watch TV. We watched the end of a programme about wildlife and the environment in China. We watched the beginning of a programme about a Mesopotamian tribe whose name I can't begin to spell when my thoughts sped up a bit again and turned to harming myself. I kept hearing odd things, mumbling voices having faraway conversations, despite nobody being awake. I went up to the pharmacy. They offered me risperidone, 1mg. 1mg? Is that a joke? Fuck that. Not only would that be useless for the problem at hand, it'd leave me feeling strange and acting oddly all throughout the next day. Apparently I'm no longer written up for anything else. I asked if they could call a doctor and get me a once-only prescription for something other than an atypical antipsychotic. I'd rather be lobotomized than take atypical antipsychotics. They said they'd leave me with a nurse in my room and check back in twenty minutes. Things aren't getting better. I just want them to call the doctors and get me something. I'm so weary.
 
Yea fuck work and those assholes, gets me all the time (not at work) but when I get home I just get boiling hot.
 
Yea fuck work and those assholes, gets me all the time (not at work) but when I get home I just get boiling hot.
you said it gf! Some people are just pathetic! The ownee of our company has turned into greedy to extremely greedy making everyone in our office nuts!
 
Fuck this shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10 nights of overnight hookers soon yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
 
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Wellllll - I was going to suggest that we 'll take your snow n you lot can have our never-ending rain - but I'm not that kind sorry :)
Seriously I hope it clears up for you soon. A day of snow is too much for me can't stand the bloody white stuff lol xxxx
 
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