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Utah Regional PR Discussion

Aww shit yankers hitting Utah in September. I hope there's enough drugs in Utah to satisfy me urge!!! I'll be wearing a where's blah T-shirt all weekend looking for that son of a bitch. Hey blah if u see a fucked up Italian w a big nose and eyes in the back of his head wearing a where's blah shirt tap me on the shoulder and say hi. And drop some fucking goodies in my pocket will ya?
 
Jesus gents. This is something i had to share with my Utah people. This is the type of shit misinformation circulating the States about Utah. It's about as fucked as all the misinformation about E out there haha. This is a conversation between Yanker and I...

Yanker: Hey bro everybody says they dont sell cigs and coffee in Utah is that true? Should i bring our own coffee beans?

Blah: Yeah you prob should. We don't have any of that shit here.

Yanker: Actually I just called 7-11 in Salt Lake and they said they sell coffee. Is there one near u

Blah: Nope that's the only one.

Yanker: Where do u buy ur cigs? Do u have a coffee maker? We'll bring our own coffee.

Blah: There's black market shops where we sneak to get our smokes and coffee. Back alley clandestine type joints.

Yanker: Haha that's crazy

Blah: Yeah we gotta drive outta state for beer. Nobody dares sell it at those back alley shops.

Yanker: Why what would happen? Do they sell chocolate? That's a stimulant. Ur state borders must be loaded w package stores

Blah: People busted w that stuff get taken to town square for public humiliation before being locked up. They lock your head and hands in those wooden restraints u see on the movies while the town folk throw tomatoes and vegetables at ya.

Yanker: Bullshit i don't believe that haha.

Yanker: Haha now i know ur lying lmao

Blah: Totally true dude...

Yanker: I don't believe u lol

Blah: Why not? You believed we don't have coffee and smokes here? BTW what stupid fuckin idiot told you that?

Yanker: Lmaooooo u ass!! My step father and bro in law haha that's funny so u do have coffee there? I was already plotting to get my woman caught in possession of alcohol so i could stand in line and hit her in the head with a tomato

Blah: Omg yes we have coffee haha sweet christ. Everything everybody else in this country has, we have. We are just like everybody else here dude. lmfaooo

Blah: haha that is unfuckingbelievable people think that lmfaooo

Yanker: Idk a lot of people said that tho it must be a common stereotype. When i come back I'll set the record straight to all them ignorant people

Now why would that pic get deleted? Fuckers...
 
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Oh god I literally almost fell on the floor when I read this. This shit is too fucking funny. Posting pics of coffee and smokes, that shits just too funny. Yes, we have some pretty ridiculous liquor laws here, but you really only run into those problems when your at a restaurant or a bar and even then they are not so bad. I remember going to Denver Colorado for a concert in 08 and we stopped at some gas station in the city for some beer and they looked at us like we were crazy, "Beer, you have to go to a liquor store fore alcohol. Where you from?" Told him I was from Utah and he just started laughing at me like this was the first time I have ever purchased alcohol before in my life. When I told him that in Utah you buy beer at any corner store, bodega, gas station ,grocery store, whatever, he said he couldn't believe that. Being from Utah, you would think that all the other states are way more lax on there liquor laws, but that's just not the case. Smuggling coffee, that's some funny fucking shit. It makes sense now why my buddy from Georgia brought his own coffee and a carton now, I think he was just to embarrassed when he realized you can buy that shit anywhere to admit why he brought it.
 
Haha lmfao I swear I almost peed my pants during that conversation!!!! That's some funny shit I was like holy shit babe they throw tomatoes at u lmao I'm still lol'ing over this shit!!
 
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That is pretty epic, i've heard some pretty crazy things about Utah because of the "Mormon Rule" but never heard the cig and coffee thing, gotta love the misinformation that gets spread around, once I was told there was no speed limits in Montana which I guess at one point was true but there I was going 110 MPH through the great state of Montana ofcourse waiting at the bottom of a hill was a state trooper, goooood times.

the liquor is the same way in Alberta when I first moved there i'm strolling around a grocery store and wondering where the hell they put the wine and beer, but yeah you have to go to a liquor store to get it.
 
blah blah said:
Jesus gents. This is something i had to share with my Utah people. This is the type of shit misinformation circulating the States about Utah. It's about as fucked as all the misinformation about E out there haha. This is a conversation between Yanker and I...

Yanker: Hey bro everybody says they dont sell cigs and coffee in Utah is that true? Should i bring our own coffee beans?

Blah: Yeah you prob should. We don't have any of that shit here.

Yanker: Actually I just called 7-11 in Salt Lake and they said they sell coffee. Is there one near u

Blah: Nope that's the only one.

Yanker: Where do u buy ur cigs? Do u have a coffee maker? We'll bring our own coffee.

Blah: There's black market shops where we sneak to get our smokes and coffee. Back alley clandestine type joints.

Yanker: Haha that's crazy

Blah: Yeah we gotta drive outta state for beer. Nobody dares sell it at those back alley shops.

Yanker: Why what would happen? Do they sell chocolate? That's a stimulant. Ur state borders must be loaded w package stores

Blah: People busted w that stuff get taken to town square for public humiliation before being locked up. They lock your head and hands in those wooden restraints u see on the movies while the town folk throw tomatoes and vegetables at ya.

Yanker: Bullshit i don't believe that haha.

Yanker: Haha now i know ur lying lmao

Blah: Totally true dude...

Yanker: I don't believe u lol

Blah: Why not? You believed we don't have coffee and smokes here? BTW what stupid fuckin idiot told you that?

Yanker: Lmaooooo u ass!! My step father and bro in law haha that's funny so u do have coffee there? I was already plotting to get my woman caught in possession of alcohol so i could stand in line and hit her in the head with a tomato

Blah: Omg yes we have coffee haha sweet christ. Everything everybody else in this country has, we have. We are just like everybody else here dude. lmfaooo

Blah: haha that is unfuckingbelievable people think that lmfaooo

Yanker: Idk a lot of people said that tho it must be a common stereotype. When i come back I'll set the record straight to all them ignorant people

Now why would that pic get deleted? Fuckers...
Click to expand...


I knew it was too good to be true. Was going to load up babes suitcase with nippers and Caron's of smokes and fireworks. So he can stay in Utah and possible find 4 dumb sisters to marry him and take him off my hands. He might have a chance with one but I doubt ther are four complete kooks to answer my prayers
 
Utah is depressing now. I been searchin high and low for good shit n i cant find anythin. I cant even remeber that last time i seen a report outta utah. Wat happened? Bring back 2010 lol
 
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