AddictedAnna
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 28, 2018
- Messages
- 43
Been addicted to DHC (dihydrocodeine) for a year and a half. I?m very ?mood? dependent on how I take them. One day I can manage on 4/5 and others I need more. I don?t usually exceed my prescribed dose ( 2 tablets 4 times s day) but I cannot take them spread out. I have to have about 4/5 with my morning coffee then I?ll take a couple more in he afternoon. So yesterday I woke up and I?d had enough. I said screw it im going cold turkey - huge mistake. I didn?t taper or plan it out. I have 2 kids and a husband who works. The withdrawals started about midday yesterday and got worse and worse. Vomiting, shaking, sweating, the worst cramps, severe diarrhoea almost every 15 minutes. Just the worst pain, but I was determined. Moving on to this morning after managing only 1 hours sleep, I was on the toilet with unexplainable diarrhoea whilst aiming for the sink with my vomit. I also took my ?time of the month? without even realising it and long story short I wound up lying on the bathroom floor in a ball covered in my own sick, blood and feaces ?? I?m so ashamed but I knew my daughter was due home from nursery and my son from school so I showered quickly and yes I caved! I took my pillls. I couldn?t let my children see me like that. I feel so lost. I want off them so badly but with so many responsibilities I don?t see how. I?m not a big drinker at all but have a big charity event with my husbands work this weekend at an all expenses paid luxury hotel. I?m also going to be speaking at this event and it?s very important to me (ironically this charity is for a local church that feeds homeless addicts every morning) ...... so I?m back to square one. Have taken 5 and honestly feel fine now! From what felt like death to my ?normal? in just a few hours. I feel exhausted though but not unwell. Guys what do I do? I?d love to be clean. I go to bed every night terrified I won?t wake up and see me kids again cause I?m scared these pills are damaging my heart and I?ll have a massive heart attack. I love a few drinks on very rare special occasions which will be this weekend (I have no confidence without a few and won?t be able to speak if I don?t get some Dutch courage) so I?m terrified I?m going to die on Saturday night from being on these and drinking. Even though I won?t be getting really drunk I?m still terrified. I hate this life. I hate that I can?t live a normal life without medication. Does tappering really help the withdrawals or is planned cold turkey the only real option? Any help would be so appreciated.