Well, unfortunately I’ve botched it a bit, although hopefully not too badly. I used all the liquid morphine in a couple days bc shit, it’s enjoyable. I started to chop up and snort the MS Contin, but very quickly ended up doing it compulsively. I used to use a TON of coke, and snorting anything awakens that demon and I don’t want to go there because I know where it leads for me.
So for the last three days, I’ve turned to loperamide. Used 30 mg on Wed, 26 mg on Thursday, and 24 mg yesterday. Taking it all at once and it’s holding me OK. I’m bored and in pain, but I’ve been sleeping well and not having terrible restless legs or anything.
I have eight more days to go through. I got through Xmas for my kids’ sake which was the goal. I have all next week off (I’m a 2nd grade teacher), so I can afford to be a little more uncomfortable. Even when I return on the 4th of Jan (which is when I’m due to get more meds too) I’m working remotely so I can work in my jammies (well, pants at least!) from bed.
I’m hoping that I’ll be able to use my meds responsibly next time, but....chances are probably slim. I swear I’ll do it rig by every time, but here I am again.
Anyway, thank you for your advice! I’m hoping that my loperamide use is low enough and short-lived enough that I won’t have to deal with a crazy increased tolerance. Time will tell, I suppose.
Hope everyone is doing reasonably well