I meant, you should be aware that the cravings can randomly come on suddenly. You can wake up feeling unstoppable to get them and it really caught me off guard. That's all I meant, to be aware of that since you might not be yet. Cravings are typical, I wasn't saying you want to relapse. Just be prepared like if you feel them tell yourself it will pass like so long as you know in advance, I think you will be fine to stop yourself if that even happens. I just didn't get cravings like that until way later and it was rare but one mistake is all it takes at least for me.
Yeah I know right a QP is a lot, that is currency to him, it is phenomenal weed too. Nice to have a couple real friends.
I hate most drugs. I can't stand psychedelics anymore, they are bullshit to me. I absolutely love stimulants cause of the depression but they give me too much anxiety so I end up being a coffee fiend. I love weed but it's a love/hate thing I pretty much wish I never smoked it ever as I believe it hurt my health long term, but I have bigger problems now than to try and quit something that psychologically I simply can't after 15 years.
Opiates are the only drug for me. If I had the choice to be a pothead right now, I would choose not to be one. 100%. Benzos I am getting off and they were for panic attacks the whole time and extreme anxiety. The one and only drug that actually makes me feel like a normal human being without any problems (so I can focus on my life and actually get shit done) is fuckin heroin. So ironic. It's like do drugs to get your shit together or be sick and do nothing but watch myself slowly fade away.
I skipped yet another dose last night. It's messing with my sleep so bad, and my memory, but that is a solid 20 - 30% on top of the other drops. I am doing this pretty quickly I never thought I'd see the tolerance budge.
What is this with your leg? It's not weird though, you fried your brain haha. Totally normal to experience increased pain sensitivity for a long time. I still have it 14 months later, severely, to everything (for example, the winter cold didn't used to bother me). It's known as opioid induced hyperalgesia if you want to look it up, and is very common it's one reason that opiates are being phased out of chronic pain treatment apart from the hundreds of thousands (at least) of overdose deaths.
It is my feeling that you need to chill this weekend, and that you have probably been overworking yourself in this withdrawal. I don't know what it is like for you. For myself, I didn't really get out of bed for a month and felt like I was burning alive. Barely going up the stairs and feeling 80 years old+ is totally normal - I can tell you are very hardworking, the opposite of my lazy ass ("when boy when, are you gonna get your act together?"... "I think he's the antiChrist") lol sorry, stoner movie.
By the way, opiates are not sustainable either. They will completely ruin you, and I can tell you are nowhere near that point right now or you'd probably be running to those dealers and s*cking dick for those pills or slitting your wrists. Sorry to be blunt. But that is what these drugs lead to no matter how smart or successful you are, in fact the smarter people are usually more at risk so please take care. You're already addicted so keep with your kick as the drugs are going to stop working and at that point it is a lifelong struggle. I don't know how long you were using though and what dose and stuff sry I forget, can't remember what I had for breakfast in benzo wd's.
And yo wtf are you worried about muscle tone for? Your life is on the line here. This is a risk to your life fuck the gym right now your legs are sore why would you even go, you can't. If you want to quit, your body is going to take a really serious hit. You can get in shape again later, you know how to already. I know what you mean a little though I am really skinny right now and feel sort of like half a person it is weird. Are you vomiting and shitting yourself in bed haha? Like seriously, don't complain about missing some workouts you'll be good.
