tricomb
Bluelight Crew
Withholding implies holding out on sex, which is a losing situation.
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SLR Moderators: M!$TER-ED
the silent treatment
- Thread starter StarOceanHouse
- Start date
podsnomo
Bluelighter
Using sex as a weapon in a relationship is an early sign of relationship death.
A woman/girl who does that does not have a mature relationship with her own sexuality.
Sex should be a mutual celebration of affection and love in a relationship.
Using it as a tactic in a disagreement poisons the fundamentals of the relationship.
If this is going on, get out while the gettin's good.
Lots of hot fish in that cliched sea,
pnm
A woman/girl who does that does not have a mature relationship with her own sexuality.
Sex should be a mutual celebration of affection and love in a relationship.
Using it as a tactic in a disagreement poisons the fundamentals of the relationship.
If this is going on, get out while the gettin's good.
Lots of hot fish in that cliched sea,
pnm
llama112
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Nov 26, 2010
- Messages
- 4,468
Silent treatment is VERY different than being silent.
If a couple gets in an argument and goes to separate rooms/places for like half an hour, that doesn't mean they are giving each other the silent treatment. If my boyfriend and I argue, sometimes we like to separate for a few minutes, calm down, think about things, then go back to solving the problem.
Silent treatment would be if he was trying to solve the problem and I was just not saying anything and completely ignoring him.
HUGE difference.
If a couple gets in an argument and goes to separate rooms/places for like half an hour, that doesn't mean they are giving each other the silent treatment. If my boyfriend and I argue, sometimes we like to separate for a few minutes, calm down, think about things, then go back to solving the problem.
Silent treatment would be if he was trying to solve the problem and I was just not saying anything and completely ignoring him.
HUGE difference.
tricomb
Bluelight Crew
Yeah, this is what my bro's GF does while he tries to fix the problem.
Shady Kaity
Bluelighter
I guess I give the silent treatment in a way...
But I have really bad anger issues and just being alone and not talking to my bf for that period of time is a huge improvement than when I used to explode and break things and sometimes become violent.
So I don't think the silent treatment is always necessarily immature, as I've learned, for me it's a mature step I've taken by removing myself from the situation to think to myself until I calm down.
But the cold shoulder is not appropriate in all situations and relationships, as everyone's way of approaching a conflict will differ.
But I have really bad anger issues and just being alone and not talking to my bf for that period of time is a huge improvement than when I used to explode and break things and sometimes become violent.
So I don't think the silent treatment is always necessarily immature, as I've learned, for me it's a mature step I've taken by removing myself from the situation to think to myself until I calm down.
But the cold shoulder is not appropriate in all situations and relationships, as everyone's way of approaching a conflict will differ.
Shady Kaity
Bluelighter
Yes, I get silent during these times too, usually because we are in a situation where I can't remove myself. I know this is frustrating to him when he's talking about the problem at hand and I just say nothing or maybe a k or idk, but I guess I just need quiet time to collect my thoughts and feelings... I don't do it to intentionally irritate him, and I just make sure to always come back apologize, explain my actions, and then where we take the issue from there.
And we've been happily together for a year and a half now...I'm just lucky I have an extremely patient, understanding, and forgiving man in my life
god knows no one else would put up with my bs lol