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Harm Reduction The Pain Management Megathread (Chronic and Acute Pain Discussion) v6

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Sorry for the delay gang. I went to my shrinks yesterday and she was more than happy to see me. We talked and she could tell i was in a state of emergency. They have me a big shot of haloperidol. Its an antiphycotic but i was so upset i was having auditory hallucinations as i do when my mental state gets out of control. It worked really well. At first i was energized then i got home and got sleepy. It was a lovely feeling. Shit going on all around me and i couldnt care less. I spent about 30 min in this relaxed state then fell asleep. Like the best dreams ever. Woke up around midnght and took my meds, had a smoke, and back to bed. Im still pretty calm, perhaps a placebo effect but im certinatly not a mess like yesterday. She said if i get like that again there always there for me but if i have suicidal thoughts go to ER

I really dont wanna go there. You walk in and say suicide then they triage you and take you back to a holding cell pretty much. Its like a mini phyc ward. People behing glass to watch you and little cubbies with a chair. Its awful. They come in and draw blood and talk to you to see if you need to go over to the big ward. Ive been thru it twice and will not do it again. Do i feel like dying? Yes. Will i do that myself? No. She reminded me yesterday about my daughter and how bad she reacted to my moms passing. How do you think shes gonna react to your suicide. It would ruin her. I always say id do anything for her. Well ill hang in there and def talk to her more. Weekdays are tough cause homework and stuff so by the time shes done with homework and shower and dinner its late here. Ill def talk to her today.

That really scared me yesterday. The mental and physicalbpain was horrible. But i went to a dr and i didnt self medicate. Thats a huge step. My ulcer is killing me today but i just gotta face facts that im gonna be in some kind of pain all day. I come here to tell yall this cause youre the only group of folks who understand pain. Perhaps most of this could have been in mental health category and for that i apologize. Ill keep it to pain from now on but wanted you guys to know. Im getting ready to get out. I gotta spend money, which i hate but need my protien bars and gatorade, my lifeforce. I hope some of you lig on today. I miss all of you and hope all of you are managing ok. Dixi, still waiting how you made out at your horrible dr. Rtp, banana, SKR, and kattmomma just to name a few, hello and let us know how youre doing. Take care yall?
 
Closeau. I'm glad u got major help from ur shrink. Hell u can't even get into a mental health programbunless u do try to commit suicide which sometimes I think about but then I think of who would be hurt by it...did they give u any meds for the ulcer..
Dixichik how are u doing today..
Rtp where is oz just wondering..
Well guys I gotta go for now just checking in with y'all..km
 
Hey guys,

Yes, kattmomma, unfortunately, although it is helping, I still am taking all my pain meds. It is really disappointing. My goal was to be off pain meds. I've been waiting for this thing for years, and it's helping, but enough for a change? Ugh. I'm going mental as well. Closeau, I think this IS the place where we discuss pain and head, because they go together, no? Our long term pain messes with our heads. Hang in there, man. I know it sucks for now, but things will get better, I just feel it. I will PM you. You really have to know; it only takes meeting the right girl ONCE for magic to happen. And I can tell you that your bag would not put me off in the least. I worked in day care for a while. A real woman recognizes that we all poop. No biggie. Those squeamish women are not what you're looking for anyway. A real woman will see you for the amazing guy you are inside, and take care of you, as you will her.

I think I've been in stress for too long, which doesn't help things. I FINALLY found out that I didn't get the job I applied for; has been a SUPER long process; they waited for me to recover to have the second round of interviews, which was so considerate, but I was in SO much pain that week, I didn't give the best interview I could have. I am actually relieved, but it was not knowing what was going to happen for months that drove me crazy. Plus long term pain; it's no wonder my PM makes us check in with mental health every few months.

I hope everyone else is having good weather. It's gorgeous in Boston, and I really believe that makes a difference. People tell me to get out, but I'm a hermit, too. People not in pain really don't understand.

Hugs and drugs, my friends.
 
Just antibiotics kattmomma which i took the last this morning. It was aggravated. As i left my last post i went to leave and was walking to car and leg felt wet. I look down and theres was shit everywhere. My bag had opened. I calmly came up and fixed it and changed and went out. Things were fine till i went to get a product i need and went to same store i always get them from and now you need a prescription. So i went to another pharmacy i get it from and same thing. Then im at light and lady hits me in back. She was too old to be driving so i gave her a break. Im not leaving this fucking chair for as long as possible. If i was a God fearing man i would say hes trying to tell me something. But im not so i think i got really shitty luck. I just took a kolonopin cause when she hit me it was like snapping me back into yesterday. Im gonna take a break from posting cause i dont wanna be the only one out here. Im gonna cruise some other threads. Maybe i can help somebody. Thats what i need right now, or about 9 dilaudids so ill stick with helping people.
 
Closeau, you're not the only one out here,- I read but often don't have time to post.

Why are your bags leaking,are they not sticking properly or are they actually bursting?

There must be a reason/answer so at least that's one less issue you have!! Do you tell your drs about this problem?

I'm so sorry that you feel like dying atm. I would estimate at least half of us here have felt that way at some time so you're definitely not alone there.

Similarly with being suicidal, I hope each and everyone in pain has at least one thing stopping them from going that extra step.

You acknowledge you have that in your daughter. I don't know how far away she is but at least you have contact by phone and love in your heart.

Yes, your circumstances are shitty (oops), but there is always change. You never know what's just around the corner.... Just remember this,- "where there's life, there's hope".

Please keep posting ❤️

Rtp
 
Thanks Rtp. I need to hear these things. I can tell them to myself but i dont trust myself. These particular bags leak from the outlet at bottom. The velcro is a joke so i duct tape it but sometimes it comes off and i dont know and boom. The other bags i have used for a long time have awesome velcro but the sticky part isnt as good as these so usually once a week i wake up covered in it. Idk why they cant just make a bag with good things top and bottom. Theres an ostomy nurse but shes no help. They just fit you for bags and these bags supposed to stick to a somewhat flat surface. I have a hernia under mine so the bag has to like stick on a softball. They wont mess with the hernia. So im screwed either way. I cant wait to get my other bags but have to wait. My financial hole is very deep.

I want to die every day but last 2 days have been horrible. I was seriously thinking about something i shouldnt be thinking about and my phone rang and it was my daughter. She was so excited bc she was going to her first sleepover. I felt joy for the first time in a long time. We talked then she was gone. Im really trying to move out there early next year. No summer here. I got email from her teachrr and shes going to summer school. Its math, just like me, lol. Its already been 18 months. Longest by far since ive seen here. In past i would just get on a plane and go there and all the places i worked i would bring her there but now no money and this fucking bag. Limp everytime i walk and feels like somebody stabbing me in gut. I hate it

I know yall go thru simular things and im certinatly not shutting my eyes to that. I know i sound like a whiney brat but its good to have people who can relate thru this tough time. Thanks Rtp and ill keep posting for sure. Take care
 
I have untreated chronic pain problem for 2 years and now I am kinda tired being shut down by doctors who think that just because they did not find the cause of my pain they dont have to treat it. I have an appointment with another new doctor and I wonder how can I ask in a way that will make him decide to act on it. I also really dont know if it will be considered since pain management is already under-treated because of fear of addiction even when the cause of the pain is known.
Everywhere I went and asked for something else than tylenol to deal with 8/10 pain in a sensitive area doctors look at me like im a random pill popper in need of a kick because they have no proof to believe I am really in pain... I mean wtf.
Am I the only one in chronic pain without anything to help? I hope cuz it sucks !
My other dilemma is that I have a really strong sensitive system (High sensitivity to light,sound,tactical sensations even taste) and a strong stimulating system hard time sleeping, racing thoughts, muscle cramps and everything that is supposed to come with cocaine abuse. So when I take opioids I kinda need twice to 3 times the dose to feel the same effect so even If I get scripted I wont get near the satisfaction most anyone else gain from the same dose and explaining this is even worse not to look like a pill popper only looking for a kick. I am kinda fked.
 
Wow! SO much trouble in the pain world sometimes. Im sorry for all who are suffering. Ok, my rant for the day is this...Is anybody else sick and tired of hearing people who dont need pain meds loudly declaring that pain meds only cause more pain? I understand hyperalgesia, but in my experience methadone truly deleted my pain at merely 5mg 3x daily. Anybody else wanna shout about how when they found the right drug, it was a fuckin miracle?
 
Closeau - my man - this IS the whiney doom and gloom thread man, it's also the hugz and drugs and complete mental breakdown thread. All of the above is very helpful to me, I am all those things in this thread. When I'm really not well I never know if my last post is my very last so I just try to say hello, tell everyone I feel like shit cos I know others feel like shit and poor Dixi just wants a shit.

My next PM to you is going to be all about ostomy's - we're gonna get that shit sorted also under my wife's tutelage.
 
Cool SKR. Looking forward to it. Its just the bags i have now are weird. Superior adhesion so no leaks on top but the velcro at bottom is just silly. Idk who designed that shit but theyre idiots. So i duct tape it but sometimes it comes loose and idk it and i stand up and boom, all over the place. My sacred Nikes were ruined last week. My other bags have great velcro but adhesion is just ok so usually once a week ill wake up with shit all over me. Those bags are smaller and output is high during the night. Getting those bags when i get paid. I had some great bags in hospital but they were special order and i heard you can get samples on website so gonna try that. A guy whos had his for 40 yrs said less is better. A lot of people use wafers and powder and paste. Screw all that. Heat is most important so i heat my body and the bag up hot as hell then press it on. Works like a charm. Im sure theres some better bag out there but those things get pricey even with medicare so i gotta stay simple right now while im poor. Def hit me up though.

Mracid, i feel for ya man. I wish i had advice for you. It must be hell being in all that untreated pain. It sucks drs are like that. I can see one but several is crazy. I hope your new dr can help you. Also sucks you have to take so much for relief. Just know youre in the right place. Keep us updated on your new dr. Good luck man!

CfZrx, thats great the Methadone helps that much. Thats a low dose too. Dilaudid was like that for me. It always was the only thing that helped when theyd give it to me in ER. So when i got the pills i was happy and they helped completly. Ive been on them for a long time so my tolerance is f'in up the pain relief. My 8mg pill doesnt go as far as it used to and my ms contins suck but im not complaining. Good to hear their meds are working out here.

I just wanna apologize for all my negativity. Im in it but it breeds so im not gonna let it spread to others. It prob doesnt bother yall but it bothers me so for my mental well being i must apologize. I got a peaceful afternoon going so i wanna ride it out. Ill live. I slipped on cat litter in my bathroom and did a split so both groins are killing me. I wish ice or heat help but they dont. Almost med time so its just been Tylenol. Always something. Oops, negative, lol. I truly love this thread and everybody who posts on here. To those who are ok, maintain it and for those struggling, hang in there. Dixi, we love you. Please stay strong?
 
Closeau- Thanks for the support, I know that nothing said can relieve pain but know that everyone who lives with pain is stronger than everybody else. Everyday I feel the urge to end this but then I think about the people that cares about me and how I do not want to hurt them by simply leaving like that. We all need a reason to stay alive and stay strong, keep going.

Cfzrx- I agree, pain meds are causing hyperalgesia only in specific conditions. I am glad that methadone is working well with you ! Altho methadone is the has one that the lowest risk of hyperalgesia since it blocks NMDA receptors which are responsible partly for hyperalgesia.So the combination of the 2 mirror compound (Levo and Dextro methadone) that have 2 different actions are synergically reducing pain developpement. That is why methadone is so good as a pain killer but really potent, also why you had the lowest risk of a hyperalgesia attack.

I might be seeing a private doctor (my brother's doctor) in an emergency appointment, if I believe my brother's saying, this doc is not affraid of using big guns, I just hope he believes me ! This might help me hold on for the time I have before I see the specialist (urologist sadly :( )
 
8) Hey Y'all...Happy to see everybody posting, keeping our PAIN PEEP thread rolling! Thanks for the thoughts and good wishes...SKR, you made me laugh out loud! Good for the weary soul...weary, indeed. I've been told throughout my life that I'm "full of shit". Turns out, they were right!

I know folks get tired of hearing my troubles, so I withdraw and hide in my work. When the pain becomes suicidal, I isolate. My life could be so different if I had just one doctor who cared enough to do the work to treat me. Alas, I don't.

Closeau, my brotha, I'm sorry you're having horrid issues with your ostomy. PLEASE take SKR's offer to help you. Don't assume you can't afford your supplies. Take the help where you can get it, when it is offered. My thoughts are that something is malfunctioning that can be tweaked or corrected. Just think what a difference that could make in your overall outlook...not to have the anxiety of surprise blow-outs. Thank you, SKR for offering not only your efforts, but also your wife's knowledge. We need to lift each other up whenever we can. Closeau, it's gonna work out. Question: If you could get to CO? where your daughter lives, would you have a place to stay until you could find work/permanent housing? Maybe there's some work in the legal cannabis industry that you supplement your disability?

Anna...SO THRILLED that your SCS is easing your pain! :) I'd still hold off on paint ball games, for now!

Cfzrx...Kudos for achieving true "pain management". My PM has no hesitation for writing big meds because I'm the poster child for "I SHOULD BE DEAD". Problem is, my crazy mixed up GI system refuses to cooperate. He doesn't treat the whole patient. I want to try the CBD:THC oils/tinctures, but looks like that "ain't happening".

Mracid, KM13, Steph...Sending positive vibes your way.

As SKR said...It sounds like we're all up shit creek, in one way or another. We've gotta keep hope alive that if we paddle hard enough, there's clear water just around the bend. Oh, fuck, who am I kidding? Let's just put on our Muck boots and wade through...

RTP...Sorry I've not posted since your question. OSFA is "one size fits all". Doctors tend to make generalizations among patients with similar ailments. They shouldn't, but they do. They should treat us all as the individuals we are.

Take endometriosis...please! :X

Doctors have no clue unless they specialize. There are FEW who do, so it's become a cash cow, literally, that can pick and choose whose insurance they accept, or worse...require cash up front. The closest ones to me will require air travel. They've basically told me they've done all they can do.

My PM doctor told me that the motility med I need (Zelnorm) has been taken off the U.S. market.
 
Hey all. Hope I'm not breaking thread flow. I'm getting a port taken out of my chest tomorrow. It's near the heart in the chest, threaded into some main artery into heart. I must admit that I'm scared. About what part? I don't know. I'm just scared. Don't know if anyone can comment but just thought I'd post. Let's be pain free all.
 
SK...No flow broken, ever! We're just hangin out, talking shit. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Wow, I don't blame you for being scared. What is the port for? Was it temporary for delivery of meds?

We're all here for you, my brotha. If you need to talk, feel free to message me. Will you have someone there to support you? That will ease some of your anxiety, I'm sure. Everything will be fine, SK. Just please be honest with your anesthesiologist/surgeon, for possible drug interactions. Please post an update as soon as you're able to do so.
 
It was for when I was starting chemo. I've been in remission for a year, so doctor said I could have it removed . The fun part will be the fentanyl /midazolam combo will be heaven. I'm just wondering if I should mention I'm anxious. I'll update after surgery.
 
Good luck Speed King. Im sure its pretty routine so you should be fine. Easy for me to say. Fentanyl combination sounds lovely. Focus on that. Def check in after.

Dixi, thanks for your words. Im looking forward to skr message and i welcome the help. Im ordering my other bags Wed. I turn 41 Wed. I cant believe it. Just seems like i was a young whipper snapper, lol. Im so sorry your situation is what it is. Im bout to go to sleep but ill pray for you first. Hang in there darlin?
 
Hi all,

I'm sorry my peeps are not doing too good. How about some good news? The spinal cord stimulator keeps working! I'm in NYC for 3 days on April break and have walked over 3 or 4 miles a day! I can't tell you how much a change of scenery helps the attitude. When I was home a few days ago, I was in a bad place. I think it was too much stress for too long, plus too much pain for too long, etc. But some BEAUTIFUL weather and a few days off, and I'm a different person.

Obviously, we can't all go away on vacation, but how about mini-vacation? Can you take a trip to a local beach or lake? Go to the pet store and play with kittens for a few hours? Go to the salon and get your hair done? This trip has done wonders for me, and I can't believe I walked as much as I did. I LOVE throwing it in my husband's face, who (started by trying to be thoughtful), but ended up reminding me 8 times on the way to NYC that I shouldn't 'overdo' it, because we'd been there before, and I don't want to spend vacation in a hotel bed. He doesn't realize that sometimes I just need alone time and use my back as an excuse. But seriously, a different space helped me to have a different frame of mind. Did my back go out at the end of the day? Sure. But no biggie. Did he forget my suitcase? Yup! But no biggie.

Man, being in less pain really changes things. Either that, or all those drugs are finally starting to kick in...
:)
Keep those chins up, my people.
 
Guys I'm hvng trouble msging, especially when writing a long post on my phone the network glitches & there's twenty mins of my time wasted. I can only type with my left hand, but at I can hold a cig in my right hand w/out it dropping 50% of the time!

Know that I'm thinking of all,-the Cpp's finally having good relief or extra meds as well as the ones still suffering & silently (likely) screaming for some type of relief before they consider going too far.

I wish you all a less painful day tmorro & peace, harmony & humour,

Rtp❤️
 
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