^rnr - how do you feel about the waiting? i was fine with having no idea it was coming, but one day he blurted out (pissed, naturally) "we could get married this year, if you want". i took that as not being a proper proposal and simply said something along the lines of maybe not that year, there wasn't enough time to plan, but yes, we could do it soon.
that then turned me into a psycho, knowing it was coming but not knowing when. every month or so when i'd had too much to drink i'd demand him to tell me
when it was going to happen, why was i waiting like this. which must be the most unattractive thing in the world!
eventually i realised that a big part of it was that it felt weird for it to be
his decision as to when and where - up til then we'd spent 5 years as a unit, making all the decisions that mattered jointly, then all of a sudden i had to sit back and wait for him. weird feeling.
My answers for the quiz (i love quizzes!)
How long were you engaged for?
It will be about 10 and a half months on the day in April. We both would have preferred it to be a little longer, but preferred to stick to autumn rather than wait a bit longer and do it in winter, or have to wait another 3 months on top of that for spring.
How many months before you start(ed) planning details?
We started looking at stuff online within a month, but didn't actually get out to look at the venue for about 2-3 months.
How many people will/did you invite?
We invited about 130 people. The guest list was the thing that involved the most discussion - we're both from big families (8 sets of aunts and uncles on each side) so we had to decide whether we were inviting them all and how that would affect the number of friends we could have, and the venue we chose.
In the end I opted to leave off my cousins on my dad's side - they're all at least 15 years older than me and I haven't spoken to them for at least 5 years (nothing malicious, we just haven't been a hugely close family since being kids) and the boy opted to invite all of his, knowing that some from the side he's less close to won't come (thank god cos we'd go over budget if they did!) It was also convenient that we've got a few people living overseas, so we could invite them while being pretty confident that they wouldn't be able to make it. Though this is actually what happened with his brother and his girlfriend, they're actually out here at the moment on a trip they'd booked like a year ago, and they couldn't afford another trip just a couple of months later. boo.
I'm hoping in the end we'll have only about 100.
Was religion incorporated into the ceremony?
No, it won't be. I'm a non-practicing Catholic, he's a minimally practicing Buddhist, so while we live our lives vaguely by religious principles of not being evil, it wouldn't feel right for us to be making promises about our marriage that way. I'm actually not even sure how religious his family is but while most of my aunts/uncles/grandparents are church goers, they're all pretty relaxed about the fact this generation isn't.
Were there any disagreements between families regarding details?
Nope - we haven't given them any input! We're actually seeing his mum for the first time in months this week so we'll have a chat about the day and see if she has any *input* to provide
Have you used a planner?
The internet! haha. The venue gives us a coordinator for the day (she's so lovely. I feel very lucky that everyone I've encountered in this process has been great) but the majority of things has just been me.
What kind of venue was used?
A restaurant on Sydney harbour - they have a lovely little outdoor atrium type thing that looks right across to the bridge, so that's where we'll have the ceremony, then move straight into the reception inside the restaurant.
AND for some random reason there is going to be fireworks on that night at darling harbour (just around the corner from where we are) so i'm pretty sure we'll be able to see them from where we are. so nice of the city to put fireworks on just for my wedding!