• 🇬🇧󠁿 🇸🇪 🇿🇦 🇮🇪 🇬🇭 🇩🇪 🇪🇺
    European & African
    Drug Discussion

    Welcome Guest!
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Tell A Shit Joke: Number 2

^ *hates to admit to some sniggering accompanying his shuddering*

A woman walks into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a Christmas Tree on her right inner thigh and a cocktail drink on her left inner thigh.

The tattoo artist says, "Thats an unusual request. Why do you want two tattoos there?"

"Because my husband needs to eat between Christmas and New Year."
 
A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You'll feel so much better!"

The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.

So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this?
Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!"

The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.

"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health!
Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you''ll feel so good!"
The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.

The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask,
"Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."

The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a fucking cunt every time he's on ecstasy!"
 
Two blondes walk into a building...



You'd think one of them would have seen it.
 
A woman runs into the back of a New Age Travellers' bus, in broad daylight on a clear stretch of road. The police turn up on the scene. The Sergeant walks around the vehicles, looking and tutting. Then he says to the woman, So how fast do you reckon these hippies were going when they backed into you?
 
F.U.B.A.R. said:
A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You'll feel so much better!"

The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.

So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this?
Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!"

The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.

"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health!
Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you''ll feel so good!"
The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.

The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask,
"Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."

The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a fucking cunt every time he's on ecstasy!"
Click to expand...

This is quality. =D
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top