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Social Tell a Joke
- Thread starter FixXxer
- Start date
vision conquest
Bluelighter
So I didn't search the whole thread so I hope this isn't a repeat.
A bloke walks into a bar, he doesn't look very happy.
He takes a seat at the bar, orders a drink then proceeds to pull a tiny little man out of the back pack he's carrying, then he pull's out a tiny piano, places it on the bar and the one foot tall man takes a seat at the piano and starts playing, brilliant classical piano.
The bar tender ande the others at the bar stare in amazement, that's amazing they all say, where did you find him, you'll make a fortune out of this as a show, people will come from miles around to watch this tiny man play his tiny piano.
Why do you look so pissed they all ask, you will get rich, so tell us where did you find him.
So the man proceeds to tell the story.
I was walking through the bush one day and I came across this old lamp, it was old and hidden in the scrub.
So I took it home and thought if I cleaned it up it might be worth something.
So I start rubbing it and next thing, smoke starts pouring out and then a genie appears.
You may have one wish he says, and so I made my wish.
At this point the blokes at the bar are hanging on every word, so what did you wish for they all ask, and why aren't you happy as larry.
The man replies, I don't know if the genie was fucking with me or hard of hearing or what.
I tell you what I do know, I didn't bloody ask for a twelve inch pianist.
A bloke walks into a bar, he doesn't look very happy.
He takes a seat at the bar, orders a drink then proceeds to pull a tiny little man out of the back pack he's carrying, then he pull's out a tiny piano, places it on the bar and the one foot tall man takes a seat at the piano and starts playing, brilliant classical piano.
The bar tender ande the others at the bar stare in amazement, that's amazing they all say, where did you find him, you'll make a fortune out of this as a show, people will come from miles around to watch this tiny man play his tiny piano.
Why do you look so pissed they all ask, you will get rich, so tell us where did you find him.
So the man proceeds to tell the story.
I was walking through the bush one day and I came across this old lamp, it was old and hidden in the scrub.
So I took it home and thought if I cleaned it up it might be worth something.
So I start rubbing it and next thing, smoke starts pouring out and then a genie appears.
You may have one wish he says, and so I made my wish.
At this point the blokes at the bar are hanging on every word, so what did you wish for they all ask, and why aren't you happy as larry.
The man replies, I don't know if the genie was fucking with me or hard of hearing or what.
I tell you what I do know, I didn't bloody ask for a twelve inch pianist.
jasperkent
Bluelighter
The first time I heard that one it was really edgy because WWII had just ended.
jasperkent
Bluelighter
They finally caught that guy who murdered all those black dudes.
He was charged with impersonating a police officer.
He was charged with impersonating a police officer.
FixXxer
Bluelighter
Did you know that nothing starts with n and ends with g?
Robi
Bluelighter
Say what you want about the flat earth theory but last time I checked the water on the earth surface was not carbonated.Also the Flat Earth Society has made a new Netflix documentary,which has been nominated for The Golden Globe Award.
Robi
Bluelighter
Two brown gerbils were sitting a bar.A white one walks in,the brown one nudges the other brown one and says" he must be the new guy in town"
pixies+
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2024
- Messages
- 3,349
i’m definitely not understanding the carbonated water thing
and i for real thought the golden globe thing was a joke…
noooope…
oh dear.
Robi
Bluelighter
For flat earth,like a flat sodai’m definitely not understanding the carbonated water thing
and i for real thought the golden globe thing was a joke…
noooope…
oh dear.
pixies+
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2024
- Messages
- 3,349
damn me … i need to do better lol
Working_Class
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 12, 2019
- Messages
- 571
How can you tell if an ant is a girl ant or a boy ant?
If you drop an ant in water and it sinks, it's a girl ant.
If you drop a boy any in water and it floats, it's a Boy ant.
If you don't get it, try saying it out loud
If you drop an ant in water and it sinks, it's a girl ant.
If you drop a boy any in water and it floats, it's a Boy ant.
If you don't get it, try saying it out loud
Fire&Water
Bluelighter
Yikes
chippermonk
Bluelighter
Where is the groan reaction when you need it,?
Fire&Water
Bluelighter
Theyd probably get a gig at the new comedy clubs
pixies+
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2024
- Messages
- 3,349
first time i smoked a joint i was 12 and i got high as fuck. by far the most pleasant weed high i’ve ever experienced.
someone told me the cow walked into a bar joke and i laughed for a solid 20 minutes. hyperventilated, cried, and literally peed my pants a little. it nearly killed me.
26 years later i still giggle every time it crosses my mind.
someone told me the cow walked into a bar joke and i laughed for a solid 20 minutes. hyperventilated, cried, and literally peed my pants a little. it nearly killed me.
26 years later i still giggle every time it crosses my mind.
Robi
Bluelighter
How do tall people stay humble? Door frames.
