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TDS Social~EveryOne Look at Your Neighbor With Love

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Nice one D's! Nothing like the 'good' tired after a day of honest work, no? Keep at it; it really is good work, especially if you get your journeyman/trades certificate/whatever the hell there is in your area. And overtime work = win, every time. As long as you're actually getting paid extra for it, of course: don't let them take advantage of you because you're new.

Also, congrats on winning the Words poetry contest! That's awesome!

Changing gears a bit: I can deal with all kinds of shit these days, but uncertainty still messes me up. I may be undergoing a big change at work, but it depends on something that is completely out of my control, and which I won't find out about until next Monday at the earliest. I know that I shouldn't bother about it until then, and that I need to live more now rather than any other time, but I'm still having trouble with that.

Always opportunities for improvement, I suppose.
 
^The unknown can be bothersome at times :)

I missed 2 of my mindfulness classes but went yesterday- It wasn't all I wanted.......
But it reminded me of those people who go to church and say "It was if God spoke to me or was speaking to me"- It was very much on a topic I needed to hear about but it made me very emotional. We discussed automatic self talk and sound blah blah- and we were given a paper that had a long list of negative self talk things- The leaders of the group talked about depression and anxiety and I actually cried in class. I felt like I should get up and walk out but didn't want to draw attn to myself b/c I had already talked in all of the open discussion during the class (questioning a lot of what was going on and what the purpose of certain things were- it not a discuss your feelings kind of thing) and didn't want ppl to think I was upset....
I kept trying to look away or hide my face b/c I HATE crying in front of people. No, it's not that I feel weak or anything, it that I don't people to think I want sympathy. I bolted out of that room so fuckin' fast when class was over and I really hope I pull out of this depression soon b/c its getting in the way of my everyday activities, obviously.
 
Yay, Oceans back! =D

I hate crying on front of people too but Ironically I cry easier on front of them, something hits a nerve and it just opens up, then I get angry with myself or try to pass it off like im okay or try and cough my way through it- which makes it even more bloody obvious...ugh! 8)
Maybe it's good that you got that out of you a bit though, maybe thats what you need perhaps?<3
 
^My mother said the same thing-
I cried most of yesterday, so.........I guess it was needed.
I couldn't hold it in anymore.
By the end of the night I felt better though :)

And thanks for the welcome back- though I will likely be posting lightly- hopefully back full force tomorrow- <3
 
I still can't cry in front of people (except my boyfriend of course). I kinda admire those who can cry in front of others!
 
i cry every time i watch "Forest Gump".. when his mom dies.. man that shit tears me up every time, it's happy, but sad!

Theres a lot of movies out that are sad, sometimes i bust a tear just to let out that built up sadness.. maybe all the shit ive gone through in my life is let out in my tears.
 
Hey guys, I think i'm going to be posting in here for a bit now. I'm mainly in the ED but also the OD and PD, and I hardly ever post in here. ANYWAY, i'm just coming to a lot of realizations and my depression has gotten to the point where I'm getting a lot of suicidal thoughts which I never thought I'd get to. I read the sticky about if you're thinking about committing suicide with the 5 things to remember, and it does help, but like it said, it's good to talk to people which I don't have. Psychiatrists/psychologists are out of the question for now from my extreme social phobia because the last time I went I was panicking the entire time and not able to open up.

Whatever, blah blah blah, this is a long intro for a fucking social thread hahahaha, if you want to know more about my depression/anxiety issues I posted in this forum earlier today titled "trapped" (no, i'm not promoting my thread nor am i asking/begging you guys to reply).

My location is literally where I'm at 99.997% of the time, and so i recognize a few people in here :P
Anyway, i'm drunk even though that goes against what I want but explains my lengthy post. Just wanted to drop in and see what's going on up in hur :D:D:D
 
^^ Welcome to The Dark Side rollin_stoned <3
There are a lot of people in here who have been through exactly what you're going through, you're never alone in here :) *hugs*

ocean said:
^Oh yeah, I cry watching movies and shows- and that save the animals commercial-
But REAL cries , for myself.........not so much :)

So..........what's everyone up to besides crying? :D
Click to expand...
Crying feels good most of the time though, for me anyway :)
Like dis:
Lykke Li - Let It Fall
Oh how I love her so :)


Aside from crying, I am just so glad this week is over! Bring on the weekend *sigh of relief*
I hope to get a long run in on Saturday, and a fair amount of study done on Sunday. Tonight I have a friend's birthday drinks but I'm going to drive so that I'm forced to not drink. It's a good trick actually, works every time. My body deserves a break from alcohol.
 
hey rollin welcomes to TDS.
sucks to hear about ur suicide thoughts, i get those to at times, but i cant feed the fire. if ya kno wat i mean. think happy thoughts!

eh, work was tiring, i did get a lot of shit accomplished today. ran about 2000ft of wire. all up over the place. works been good to me though. still gotta get used to waking up at 5:30am, but it's all good. builds character :)

Lykke Li has such a smooth voice...
"Possibility".. I listen to that one a lot when I'm just laying in the tub, having "those" kind of days.
 
gracias neo! i know i'm not alone, and i keep trying to tell myself that but by human nature i think that my situation is different, which is true since everyone is unique and therefore everything is subjective, but by reading your guys' posts, i've got a lot to go and i'm a whole lot worse than I thought /: I'm just going to work on it a little bit at a time. Even though my spring break starts tomorrow after a test that starts at 10, i'm still going to use the time to catch up on my math and work on my anthro. chapter essay questions during the day instead of getting drunk or messed up in some sort of way and saving it for the night :P (since it is spring break btw hahaha).

I'm going to try not doing a shot of dope tomorrow after the test....but it just seems like a good way to start off my break, ya know? (even though when i first quit i planned to only use my bday and bday weekend which i broke /: oh well!!! we all start somewhere eh?

but I hear ya D's about the happy thoughts, but whenever I try for the "get-out-of-the-negative-thought-pattern" routine, i just feel so mentally exhausted and it's hard and end up giving up.......and even though it's mentally exhausting, my insomnia still keeps me up /:

oh, and crying is one of the best forms of relief yet still don't want to show my emotions enough to cry at movies even alone :P
 
ive meet a few myself...

:P

ocean said:
Word: Anxious.
The tsunami wave at my house is supposed to be anywhere from 6 inches to 6 ft.
If its actually 6 ft we'll actually be in trouble- If its a foot, no big thing.
All the ships are moving out and I THINK we'll br okay b/c the state ferry is parked behind an island across from us- so its hiding in the protected zone- what sort of worries me is all the ships heading out of our area........
Click to expand...

hahaha woah.

your back yard will be wet....

annnd i doubt anything less then a true ' cutter ' will sail on such days.
 
I just heard about Japan! Holy shit, its awful, apparently its gonna hit Hawaii as well?....
Glad you nd your Family will be okay Ocean!<3

Slept in late Today, feel like a Moron for not knowing about this! :P
 
^^No worries I only started listening to the news again this year. Before that I wouldn't know if there was a tsunami in my own back yard.

Glad things safe over there ocean!

Me: Waking up. Going to pick up kitty cat today...you will all be swarmed with photos later!
 
^Hawaii got hit already with 6-8 ft waves.
Japan obviously got the worst of it-
They're saying we're gonna get the biggest wave in a few hours even though it has started to hit our coastline and isn't much of anything in my area :)

New word: relivedbutsadforjapan.
 
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