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couple of Texas homies cowboying it up :P just messing with you two. Congrats on 96 hours. lets make it 120! you can do it.
 
We'll it's crashing time. Can't do dope when I'm asleep so I'm calling it a great day. Although I'm having cramps in my arm muscles which is really pissing me off. Think I may need to drink more water tomorrow.

Austin is a pretty cool town and I need to do some real looking around for a meeting.
 
supplement with magnesium and possibly potassium and sodium (very little sodium since most of us eat enough of it). but my recommendation is eat a couple bananas a day and supplement with a zma (zinc and magnesium) supplement. its mildly sedating, helps boost your lowered testosterone (you were an opioid user correct?) and helps ease cramping. I believe tyrosine helps with cramping too as that's what we in the weightlifting/bodybuilding community use to combat excessive muscle pumps which are like common cramping. get a good night sleep, stay hydrated, make sure your electrolytes and micronutrients are in check. also for those getting clean, check out the healthy living forum and steroid discussion for supplementation information. lots of good information in those two forums. good people as well. :D
 
Damn. That morning meditation was badass.

I live in a halfway house and we have public meetings down stairs. It's cool going to the meeting and bumping everyone's fist. Not to mention they asked me to read from the book and everyone got quiet as if they gave a huge shit about what I had to say even though I was just reading from the book.

My friend was reading and my other friend kept distracting him and he was like "dude, pass" lol and everyone started laughing.

7:36am and I feel motivated as fuck.
 
Opioid, yes. Didn't sleep for shit. Finally fell off at around 7 this morning, but had to get my butt up at 8 to get to work. And now I'm going through the wonderful PAWS effects as the cravings are really singing to me right now. Back to 10 minutes at a time.
 
^10 minutes at a time is what we have to resort to sometimes. even with over a year clean sometimes I gotta do 10 minutes at a time. you're doing great honestly. I give you a lot of props for not having to lock yourself in a detox Ward or something. lots of strength and courage. keep pushing on. you can do it man. you're posts here will help someone else make the same fight youre having down the line. already doing 12th step work :P

that's badass SS. sometimes I wish I stayed in a halfway house for the fellowshipping that goes on and the meetings a lot of them have. also gives you independence but still have people to lean on when needed. lemme crack open my meditation book.

as for me, just woke up, getting ready for school and a homegroup meeting tonight. I love Wednesdays for that reason :D
 
It's about 5 mins from downtown Dallas so it's pretty much the central hub of the recovery community. I run into old drug buddies all the Time that got clean. In fact, my current sponsor is the same dude who got me on heroin. I use to hate his guts. I've known him about ten years. Since 04 anyway.

But yeah he is a badass sponsor and saved my life.
 
Thanks Sero, that really means a lot. I'm going to my first NA meeting tonight and told myself I'm going to go ten times before I make a decision on if it's right for me or not. I mean, how can I get an honest feel for a group of people unless I'm willing to invest the time.
 
good deal. check out a bunch of different meetings for different fellowships. 4th tradition (autonomy) plays into a lot if I like a meeting or not and also finding people I click with. I hit about 5 different groups a week to see people. I got a circuit if you will.
 
I went to my first NA meeting tonight. I really liked it. I used to be very active in AA but have not been in a few months. I need to go back and get a sponser and start working on my steps again. When I stopped drinking I used to go to a meeting every night, even if it meant walking 5 miles. I need to get back to that place where I would do anything to get where I need to be.

Most people in my old home group are dual addicted, with a few people who were not really drinkers at all, but either prefer AA or aren't able to get to NA(there are way fewer NA meetings around here). I really liked the meeting I went to tonight (it's a glbt meeting), I'm not sure I'll be able to get to it every night since it's a town over and I don't drive, but I will try to make it as much as I can.

My old home AA group meets tomorrow, I'm nervous about going back because I feel so bad about just dropping it, but I know I'll be welcome. It's just so tough to admit you messed up. I don't even know if I'm ready to surrender again, but I want to be able to surrender.
 
Just had to say what a great thread guys. So much positive energy & recovery here :D. Reading this thread has helped me not act on my base impulses to destroy my life & recovery.

My illness wants me to be unmanageable so I will run to it's warm embrace for comfort & familiarity. Since I am my illness, my best ideas are usually to my detriment so I have learnt to wait before I act & ask myself "is this in my best interest or is it reopening the door of detriment?" It does not always work & I have made mistakes but I will take the odd mistake over a lifestyle devoted to destruction.

One thing that I try & live by is sobriety is not about not drinking, drugging etc but about having the mental clarity to make the right decisions for yourself. If my mind is right then the rest will look after itself.
 
feralkitten said:
I went to my first NA meeting tonight. I really liked it. I used to be very active in AA but have not been in a few months. I need to go back and get a sponser and start working on my steps again. When I stopped drinking I used to go to a meeting every night, even if it meant walking 5 miles. I need to get back to that place where I would do anything to get where I need to be.

Most people in my old home group are dual addicted, with a few people who were not really drinkers at all, but either prefer AA or aren't able to get to NA(there are way fewer NA meetings around here). I really liked the meeting I went to tonight (it's a glbt meeting), I'm not sure I'll be able to get to it every night since it's a town over and I don't drive, but I will try to make it as much as I can.

My old home AA group meets tomorrow, I'm nervous about going back because I feel so bad about just dropping it, but I know I'll be welcome. It's just so tough to admit you messed up. I don't even know if I'm ready to surrender again, but I want to be able to surrender.
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I know the feeling oh so well. I've been fighting alcohol abuse for 7 years now and I think I have a collective amount of maybe 4 years sober...from booze at least. It's 7 months now for the alcohol and 5 days for the opioids. I just hit my first NA meeting and it was awesome. I'm going to my old AA home group on Friday and I'm nervous since I haven't been there in a couple of years. Pride is a quality that gets in the way and fear partners up with it and makes me nervous about walking through those doors. But I know I'll be welcomed because that's what we do in the fellowship.
 
I forgot to add scared. It's scary walking back in even though when a member fell and came back in, it was such an inspirational feeling seeing the bravery in that person. The ones that are willing to continue to work at this are my shining stars that will help guide my path.
 
Yeah, the pride thing is almost embarrassing to me. I don't like that I've let it get in the way of recovery, this attitude I sometimes have of "well either you do something perfectly the first time or you're a failure" is such b.s. I would never think that of another person, so I shouldn't do it to myself.

And i know there are a couple of gossips in the rooms, just like in any group of people, but for one thing they're the minority, and for another, it's not really my issue and is 100% about something that's going on with them. They say to find people who have what you want, and I never want to be someone who whispers about someone's relapse, so I'm not gonna let it get in the way of my program.

Man it really felt good to go to a meeting though.
 
welcome both of ya to the NA family :) hope you two enjoy your stay. I had a lesbian friend celebrate 30 days today. she's badass, rocked a T-shirt that said "turning straight bitches since 1985" lol.
nawelcomewhitekeytagfro.jpg
 
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soundsystem00 said:
Thanks dude.

I almost forgot. I have a question for y'all.

I posted on Facebook "today I have 13 months sober. I'd like to thank my higher power, my sponsor, my family and my friends. If anyone wants what I have, I am available to sponsor and show you how to work the steps. I would love to share this amazing feeling"

52 people liked it. It was the most likes I've ever gotten for anything. Well, I feel like my motives were pure. I simply did it hoping that it may inspire or help someone.

This old-school messaged me saying not to post that stuff. That it breaks the anonyminity and puts unnecessary pressure on your program.

I asked another friend about it and she said that's bullshit and it goes back to "don't believe anything that you can't refer back to the big book" ..

What do you guys think?
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I think you shouldn't second guess yourself; I do this all the time, and second guessing yourself is a bad thing.
 
Ok. Remember how a few weeks ago I failed a drug test for meth? Well I haven't used meth in almost 2 years so they sent it to the lab. I've been worried for 2 weeks.

Reported to probation. The results came back.


Negative.


soundsystem, you are NOT the father.


*liquid dances*

Also, there is a 2000 Toyota Avalon in my near future.

And I think I'm gonna enroll for classes at university of Texas at Dallas [UTD] soon.. Might as well. I'm too smart to be a telemarketer.
 
Another day of sobriety under the belt. I was having a hard time figuring out how I was feeling. It's been so long without some sort of drug in my body that its just odd...a wonderful odd.

Today I read from a 12 and 12 and worked my butt off. Hopefully I'll be able to get some sleep. That's the one thing that hasn't come easily. I'm sure it will and until then I've got plenty of books and plenty of movies I can watch with my wife. Life is good at 6 days.
 
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