Single? For how long?

[MyFinalRest]

I think there is a difference between wanting a relationship and seeming desperate. Sometimes people cross that line and maybe they don't realize it. There isn't anything wrong with wanting a GF. It's very hard to find a GF vs a chick you can hang out with for a night and can't see anything longterm.

Pretty much wanting a GF is enough to get you accused of being "desperate." Becoming GF or BF with someone isn't at all like getting married, but everybody acts like it is.

It seems like everybody expects everything to be "spontaneous" and actually planning to go out to dinner is overwhelming for women now...

It also seems like it works for those freaks who really are desperate and show up at someone's doorstep at 3:00 A.M. and never leave someone alone or you gotta be ultra cold and act like you don't give a fuck. What's wrong with being normal? I think that's two of most women's biggest fears in life: making plans and doing something normal.

Really, I think you can have much more fun with a relationship, even if doesn't work out and end up being longterm. Otherwise it's kind of creepy bringing complete strangers to your house and a girl shouldn't get that FWB reputation around her social circle either. Guys might like to get their kicks with a girl like that, but they aren't hardly ever really "friends" with her.

True there is a difference between being desperate and wanting a relationships, but people also forget that there is a difference between a newly started relationship and a longterm relationship.

 

[Psyduck]

You shouldn't give these liars and creeps your sex either. There are nice people out there, but you and I will never meet them if we keep settling for the same shallow experiences with the same shady fuckers.

in addition: "Be the change you want to see in the world." (Mahatma Gandhi)

Don't counteract shallowness with more shallowness, don't counteract cheaters by cheating yourself, don't counteract selfhisness with even more selfishness... Illyria99, well, if you really think there is no higher moral standard for sex and relationships in general, just fuck arround as animals do... it's your choice. But I suppose (I hope) by now you must have figured out already that it doesn' make a human person truly happy.

 

[Illyria99]

It's a few months now that I'm single and I want it that way. however, this erotic beast needs skin to skin contact and throes of passion. I could look into dating sites, I guess.. scary venture....

I love that description.

 

[marindadupreezsa]

I really admire anyone that don't mind to be single at all, I've been in a relationships since I was 12yr old. My first relationship lasted 14yr and 7months. He died in a work related accident. I tried everything in my power to be single I was miserable moody cranky and very depressed. I didn't feel whole. So I got married in less than a year we knew each other only two weeks there was no love involved but as time went on we fell in love its now almost 15yr later and deaf will do us part. So my point is I don't know how people cope that's single.

 

[ricardo08]

I've been single since I was 18 (22 now), out of choice. Had several "things" but the way I look at it; unless I'm completely committed and sure I really want to spend a significant amount of time with a person I avoid it, on a long term basis anyway. Seems like a waste of time to me, but maybe I'm just depressed. I know when I'm sure about something, that feeling. And unless that's there, I avoid.

 

[lola]

It's a few months now that I'm single and I want it that way. however, this erotic beast needs skin to skin contact and throes of passion. I could look into dating sites, I guess.. scary venture....

I get a lot of good quality erotic action and general flirting with a selection of intelligent/respectful/interesting men (including some with bf potential) from OKCupid... just sayin'

 

[IntimacyAddict]

I really admire anyone that don't mind to be single at all, I've been in a relationships since I was 12yr old. My first relationship lasted 14yr and 7months. He died in a work related accident. I tried everything in my power to be single I was miserable moody cranky and very depressed. I didn't feel whole. So I got married in less than a year we knew each other only two weeks there was no love involved but as time went on we fell in love its now almost 15yr later and deaf will do us part. So my point is I don't know how people cope that's single.

Yes likewise, I had my first GF when I was 11 which lasted for 2 years and have been in relationships ever since - but now I find myself single and I really don't like it, I love being in a relationship and are just unhappy being single but trying to find someone that also wants anything more than a fuck buddy has been impossible so far.

 

[Pagey]

I think it just depends on your personality really. I never thought I'd do okay single because I'm naturally a very social/emotional person and I like being around someone a lot, but now that I have been for almost a year, I'm realising I'm actually fine like this. I'm maybe not as happy as I was with a boyfriend, but I'm also taking care of myself better and being more productive in my own ways.
On the other hand, one of the exes was very unsociable, never really went out and his idea of an ideal night was playing Starcraft for 10 hours straight. I'm absolutely positive that if he were single he would barely ever think about it. I don't admire him more for that though, and I don't think one is more admirable than the other, it just depends

 

[Tude]

I love being single. Matter of fact, I plan to be single my entire life. My coworkers have a really tough time understanding this. Lol they're always trying to set me up with guys and marry me off. I appreciate their concern, since they like me and care about me, but I don't need help. I don't ever want to commit to anyone, and if I did, I have no qualms asking a guy out. I thought I finally wanted a relationship last year on a few occasions, but realized it was my high sex drive attempting satiation. At 22, I'm still a virgin, and still don't believe I'm ready to cash in my chips.

When I finally decide to fuck, it'll be one-nighters in order to avoid any type of attachment developing. I can totally see myself, meeting men analogous to myself (intelligent, successful, independent) in hotels, having a great fuck, hopping on my Harley, and hauling ass. Once a day, for the rest of my life. :D Like Dr. Seuss said, "Oh, the penises you'll blow."

 

[RunYourPockets]

I've been single now for a year. I haven't had sex in 2 1/2 months. I'm not really the type to fuck and chuck. *removed sexist sentence* Fuck it. Drink more. *I* got a heterosexual buddy to trip balls with. I'm still young and they hold me back anyway. HOMIES BEFORE BLOW-ME'S.

 

[aussie101]

Single for the past month after sending gf to rehab... Needed a change. "Drug relationships" do not work. One night stands are fun though and friends with benefits

 

[Illyria99]

You shouldn't give these liars and creeps your sex either. There are nice people out there, but you and I will never meet them if we keep settling for the same shallow experiences with the same shady fuckers.

I don't look at it as "giving." If I want to fuck, I do it. And a few of these guys are rather cool.

 

[Get2Think]

I've been single too long. And it's at the point where I'm cuddling pillows just to pretend I'm napping with my ex. On one hand I'm loving my independence, money, and time spent doing whatever I want whenever I want. On the other hand I'm tired of fapping, tired of talking to myself, tired of dreaming about girls in my class, and tired of not getting laid. Being single after a 4 year relationship really shook me up. I now see relationships and sex in such a more profound way. And I've had time to get sober (5 months), go back to college and finish my degree, pay off debt, and make a gameplan for the future. I'm in the best shape of my life, very healthy an looking great! So I'm excited because the next girl (my wife hopefully) is going to be treated so so so much better than my ex. Because I made all my mistakes on my ex. I can't wait to find my wife, if you are out there please come and find me I'm so tired of waiting for you!

 

[Get2Think]

I don't look at it as "giving." If I want to fuck, I do it. And a few of these guys are rather cool.

Just fucking is so lame. Give me love, cuddling, and a best friend. Sex is the cherry on top of the relationship sundae. I can tell I'm getting older because I'm not interested in having sex with anyone if we aren't in love & not married. I'm just not willing to put myself through the heartbreak of having sex with someone who doesn't see a future w/ me. I like the idea of saving my body just for my wife and no one else. Although I'm not a virgin, I have been able to get into excellent shape, and I'm reserving my "hotness" for my wife, and my wife only. This is how I approach this topic of love, sex, and marriage. And honestly, I'm 27 now and up until about a year ago I would have never seen things the way I do now.

 

[Psyduck]

Sex is the cherry on top of the relationship sundae.

.

 

[rangrz]

Just fucking is so lame. Give me love, cuddling, and a best friend. Sex is the cherry on top of the relationship sundae.

Pretty much this... even my fiance and myself, as overtly hypersexual and into fetishes and kinks as we are, we both still think that the build up to sex is better than the sex itself. Like the petting, kissing, touch, etc. Orgasms are great too, cak in vagoo is great too, but the rest of the stuff is usually the bigger part of the enjoyment.

Even if the intensity of it is not as large, it has a much longer duration and thus, the total pleasure delivered across time is still more from that stuff than from the orgasm.

 

[IntimacyAddict]

Being single after a 4 year relationship really shook me up. I now see relationships and sex in such a more profound way. I can't wait to find my wife, if you are out there please come and find me I'm so tired of waiting for you!

This is a pretty cool comment that I can relate to. I went from a 20 year relationship to being single and that almost sent me crazy for the first year until I got back into dating again as we got married quite young. Personally I'm not one to deprive myself of my emotional or sexual needs while waiting an undetermined amount of time to find my next long term relationship. Did that when I was in my teens and felt that it caused me unnecessary stress and just made me appear needy and in hindsight that probably caused me to give off the wrong signals at the time to a potentially good partner.

 

[Tussmann]

Just fucking is so lame. Give me love, cuddling, and a best friend. Sex is the cherry on top of the relationship sundae. I can tell I'm getting older because I'm not interested in having sex with anyone if we aren't in love & not married. I'm just not willing to put myself through the heartbreak of having sex with someone who doesn't see a future w/ me. I like the idea of saving my body just for my wife and no one else. Although I'm not a virgin, I have been able to get into excellent shape, and I'm reserving my "hotness" for my wife, and my wife only. This is how I approach this topic of love, sex, and marriage. And honestly, I'm 27 now and up until about a year ago I would have never seen things the way I do now.

Damn dude that's pretty hardcore but I can respect that.

 

[Black Rabbit of Inle]

I'm fast approaching being single for as long as my last relationship lasted which is depressing me to no end.

 

[Illyria99]

I don't like someone sleeping next to me all night, whether or not I'm in a relationship. I've always been like this, and it's caused annoyance with the people I was involved with.

Cuddling is nice, yes, but I don't want anyone in my bed all night. It's annoying. Call it a quirk, but I just can't tolerate another body next to me when I'm trying to sleep.