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Should I tell my friend about his girlfriend and my brother??

stormcharger said:
If they are gonna get married please tell him man, he will eventually find out one day and if they are married it will be even more lame for him
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Yeah, this. And as has been said as well, the sooner the better, really.

As for advice on how to tell him, ack, it's gonna be delicate no matter how you do it...just you know, be considerate and understanding, be there for him, all that stuff. Make sure you're in a discreet environment in case he gets mad/upset, say something like 'there's something I really need to tell you'...It sounds like you really care about the guy though so I'm sure it'll go fine. Good luck :\
 
MrNoDramaMan101 said:
I think I should bust them out at the wedding why should I worry about embarrassing my brother and the girlfriend?? were they embarrassed to been doing what they been doing??
I actually look down on my brother now for this. He keeps texting me to not say anything but I'm not listening..as far as I know they could be banging right now as I type SMH
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don't break it at the wedding that'd embarrass your mate as much as anyone else
nobody's gonna be able to tell you something that makes you feel fine to go ahead and break the news
just do it asap knowing its going to be very hard
 
pofacedhoe said:
meet up with him and do it in person? to be fair there is no good way to do this.
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Yeah really, it's not how you tell him that's the problem, it's the information itself that's gonna upset him.....This is not telling a little kid that his gerbil died, or telling your grandmother that you broke her favorite penguin figurine, this is telling someone that their fiancé, who they are planning on marrying in 3 weeks has been fucking someone they know for 8 months! Not once, but for 8 fucking months! I feel like killing someone just reading it!

This is one of those circumstances that make you wish you were female just so that you could hit a female!

I don't know the temperament of your friend, but he'll most likely have a reaction of rage, but the feeling of deep sadness at being so utterly betrayed may make him more likely to cry....If it would me, I would suck in any sadness I may feel, fly into a rage and immediately call the girl....I'd obviously scream at her for awhile...Don't know what the relationship is like between him and your brother and how prone to violence either of them are, but like I said, the girl is the one who really deserves a fucking beating, but unfortunately that's not an option....

I'd make her tell him...
 
BlueHues said:
Yeah really, it's not how you tell him that's the problem, it's the information itself that's gonna upset him.....This is not telling a little kid that his gerbil died, or telling your grandmother that you broke her favorite penguin figurine, this is telling someone that their fiancé, who they are planning on marrying in 3 weeks has been fucking someone they know for 8 months! Not once, but for 8 fucking months! I feel like killing someone just reading it!

This is one of those circumstances that make you wish you were female just so that you could hit a female!

I don't know the temperament of your friend, but he'll most likely have a reaction of rage, but the feeling of deep sadness at being so utterly betrayed may make him more likely to cry....If it would me, I would suck in any sadness I may feel, fly into a rage and immediately call the girl....I'd obviously scream at her for awhile...Don't know what the relationship is like between him and your brother and how prone to violence either of them are, but like I said, the girl is the one who really deserves a fucking beating, but unfortunately that's not an option....

I'd make her tell him...
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It's funny how women do this shit all the time and then blame the husband/boyfriend??
She would never confess trust me.
I'll just sit him down this week and do the best that I can
And yes my brother is a scumbag for doing this I told him how I feel about this situation as well
And BTW someone siad that my brother is a "G" for doing this what is that all about??
 
MrNoDramaMan101 said:
She would never confess trust me.

And yes my brother is a scumbag for doing this I told him how I feel about this situation as well
And BTW someone siad that my brother is a "G" for doing this what is that all about??
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I just don't understand, she still wants to get married?!

You're brother being a "G"....I don't know, she's probably an attractive girl and he was just in it for the sex....I guess that's cool in some people's eyes....
 
purplefirefly said:
Another approach you might want to take is to force the girlfriend to tell him herself. I would say something along the lines of "if you don't tell him then I will"
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Yikes! ... that's making a HUGE assumption -- which is that this woman is suddenly going to see the light and decide to be straightforward and honest with her fiancee. NOT LIKELY. My money would be on her hearing the OP's threat, going to her fiancee, telling him that the OP hit on her -- and that when she rejected him, he went nuts and threatened to start spreading all sorts of horrible rumors about her. Then the OP shows up to deliver the truth and... See where this is going?

OP, it may actually *already* be going this way. Who knows what sort of preemptive stuff one or both of them has said to your friend. Someone commented earlier that these two are likely to deny everything. What's to say that they haven't started some sort of proactive campaign to try to cover their tracks? The sooner you do this, the better. And I would NOT give those two any advance warning of your intentions.

P.S. There's a financial component to all of this as well. If your friend is going to cancel the wedding (and he should) this close to the date, the sooner the better. I can practically guarantee you that there are contract problems and down payments and all sorts of money-related issues that are going to flow out of this on top of all of the emotional pain. Weddings are expensive! The sooner this gets cancelled, the better off the financial situation will be.
 
BlueHues said:
I just don't understand, she still wants to get married?!

You're brother being a "G"....I don't know, she's probably an attractive girl and he was just in it for the sex....I guess that's cool in some people's eyes....
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Well in my eyes this is NOT COOL AT ALL matter of fact the more I think about this the madder I get..I'm talking to my friend TODAY!! I'll be back to update the situation. Fuck both of them..my brother used to try to hit on my past girlfriends anyway!!! like I said he's a scumbag with no morals..banging an engaged woman!! If he gets his ass kicked I'm not gonna feel sorry for him at all.
 
Gratuitous Grace said:
Yikes! ... that's making a HUGE assumption -- which is that this woman is suddenly going to see the light and decide to be straightforward and honest with her fiancee. NOT LIKELY. My money would be on her hearing the OP's threat, going to her fiancee, telling him that the OP hit on her -- and that when she rejected him, he went nuts and threatened to start spreading all sorts of horrible rumors about her. Then the OP shows up to deliver the truth and... See where this is going?

OP, it may actually *already* be going this way. Who knows what sort of preemptive stuff one or both of them has said to your friend. Someone commented earlier that these two are likely to deny everything. What's to say that they haven't started some sort of proactive campaign to try to cover their tracks? The sooner you do this, the better. And I would NOT give those two any advance warning of your intentions.

P.S. There's a financial component to all of this as well. If your friend is going to cancel the wedding (and he should) this close to the date, the sooner the better. I can practically guarantee you that there are contract problems and down payments and all sorts of money-related issues that are going to flow out of this on top of all of the emotional pain. Weddings are expensive! The sooner this gets cancelled, the better off the financial situation will be.
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I never told them that I'm gonna tell my friend and yes he would believe me he knows that I have NOTHING to gain from "making this up" I always been straight forward with him and I'm gonna do it again today.
 
BlueHues said:
I just don't understand, she still wants to get married?!

You're brother being a "G"....I don't know, she's probably an attractive girl and he was just in it for the sex....I guess that's cool in some people's eyes....
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I guess when they say he's a "G" I'm guessing that means it's a good thing or he has "mad skills" to get someone else's woman that's already engaged to be married to have sex with him or like he's a player for banging a woman despite she's getting married.
 
Yeah, don't let that little twat wrangle out of this with lies and manipulation...Anyone with so little moral fiber and this pathological level of sneakiness belongs at a club getting picked up by random douche-bags, not in a marriage...Fuck protecting your brother, tell the truth...This is just the grimiest shit...Unless, her and your brother are "in love", which it doesn't sound like!
 
God, I cannot with this thread. I shouldn't of opened this right after I woke up, now I'm entirely fucked off for no good reason.

Kick that fuckin hoe in the snatch, for REAL.

Beat your brother's ass, too.

I'm sorry so many relationships are going to be ruined by this, and fear for the human race....
 
BlueHues said:
Yeah, don't let that little twat wrangle out of this with lies and manipulation...Anyone with so little moral fiber and this pathological level of sneakiness belongs at a club getting picked up by random douche-bags, not in a marriage...Fuck protecting your brother, tell the truth...This is just the grimiest shit...Unless, her and your brother are "in love", which it doesn't sound like!
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So glad someone sees my view on this I just hope it all goes down good today and thanks for your advice..I wish I could rate you for your feedback:-)
 
Morphling said:
God, I cannot with this thread. I shouldn't of opened this right after I woke up, now I'm entirely fucked off for no good reason.

Kick that fuckin hoe in the snatch, for REAL.

Beat your brother's ass, too.

I'm sorry so many relationships are going to be ruined by this, and fear for the human race....
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I know what you mean I get madder the more I re-read this thread and the comments too...It's stuff like this that makes me stay single. Wish me luck today.
 
I'm sorry you have to go through this, it won't be fun....Just grab your sac, walk in there and do it! Let us know what happens...
 
What a terrible position to be in. I have known my best friend since we were babies and I can definetly say that I feel the same love and bond for her that I also feel for my sister. Blood does not always make family. That said, what I would do is let the girlfriend know that it is her place to tell her fiance about the affair and the truth of it. Give her a day to do so and if she doesn't then I guess you have to be the one to tell. Secrets and lies do noone any good.
 
I wasn't serious about doing it at the wedding, that'd be a bit overboard and kind of like throwing gasoline on this already overgrown fire.

One suggestion is do not tell your friend when he is drunk or on anything that could make him more liable to snap and do something drastic. If you are gonna do it before the wedding it has to be done as soon as possible, you don't want to put it off until like 4-5 days. I assume they will call the thing off and at least it gives time to cancel it and notify guests it is off. A wedding is damn expensive and I am sure they will eat money regardless because some had to be made as down payments.

I agree with the ideas to attempt to make the girl confess. At least its really the only way aside from you telling him.
 
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