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Short Suboxone Rattle

Well made a right old arse of that didn't I?

I was basically just taking a teeny line of sub IF I felt 'odd' and that's about as heavy as it was getting. I did have a few days without any at all and to be perfectly honest, I couldn't really tell the difference to be quite honest. Things were going perfectly well. Anyway.

Got handed some lorazepam the other day for nothing. 10mg things. Don't recall ever having them, so I thought I'll have two and that'll do. Aye well that lasted about 3 hours and I motored into them for a charge. To be honest, I didn't really notice much of a buzz but I seemed happy and my attention span was down to seconds, memory to little or nothing at all. Amnesiaworld. To be expected really. Next day, I'm having a burn and the next day, 2 burns and the day after, a dig and the next day, 3 digs. I'm an idiot, so please feel free to chip and reaffirm what I already know. I will say one thing though. I got bored of my surroundings this time pretty damn fast. The majority of junkies don't half talk some crap and no matter what you do, you always seem to be 'involved' with something. Yesterday, a guy got bumped for 20 quid and I thought, "That could have been me and this lot don't appear to be very hygienic. Besides, I was supposed to be fishing this week...again".

So, today I'm back on the subs again. Just had 2mgs this time to see how things proceed from there. I think I might have another line in a wee while because I feel a little weak but by no means ill. I'll have another shot again at this. I just got paid last week and I've got nothing to show for it but a lack of memory or spending money.

I know...Stay away from benzos you bloody clown. It never comes out well at all and yet again, it hasn't.

I'll probably reappear to fill you in later if anything happens or I just get bored.
 
TEN milligram loraz?! Surely you mean 1mg, or 10mg diaz? There's no way there's 10mg loraz tablets out there...
 
Very sorry, my mistake. They were 1mg.

Don't think I'd try them again. I didn't get nearly the same enjoyment you get from temazepam, diazepam or moggies, bouncing into things and talking crap. I was happy enough for sure but they really messed with my memory, attention span etc. Mind you, I don't think I've encountered them in 20 years of benzo/heroin abuse. Mind you there's lots of 'pams' out there and since they all affect your memory one way or another, who knows really? I just doubt I'll come across them in a hurry again and if I do, I won't be that quick to gobble them down with complete abandon. Probably won't take them at all. I imagine they're the kind of thing where you could wake up in a cell afterwards asking, "Boss, what did I do?" and find you've done something properly bad.
 
Lorazepam is a shit benzo. I don't think I'm the only one that thinks so.
 
All benzos are shit really. I can't think of anything positive to say about them if I'm actually honest with myself.
 
They're brilliant, if you don't do too many. I've never entered withdrawal, from maybe 8 years of regular use. If you keep a check on your usage, they should be invaluable. If you abuse them, they'll do it back. Oh, I have anxiety, which is why I use them as I should. They've saved me, if I'm honest.
 
I liked lorazepam(temesta in Libya 2.5mg) pharm asked if I had a script no I said do I need one he never spoke just went for a box of 28 put on counter said 3 dinar I thought £1.50 , 4 more boxes plz lol I have an Arabic page now in passport and no recollection of getting from Benghazi to heathrow , think im banned from Libya ,oops anyone read Arabic? ill send a pic to be translated
 
Any advice here bupe heads ?

ive got some college interviews and open days and stuff coming up in a couple of weeks. As luck wouild have it that is more or less exactly the time i would be starting my bupe rattle according to my pre-made schedule. I clealry want to avoid that if possible.

Now theres a few ways to get round this - 1- order more pills - and increase the hold the habit will have on me.

2- Try and cut down as much as poss first, and then just top up on the days i have to be there looking in good shape ?

The 2nd option makes more sense and is easier said than done, my mirtazapaine might just be kicking in by then, and i miught be starting tio get weird wd effects from quitting sertraline.

If i wasnt halfway throughh switching ADs i wouldnt hesistate fro the 2nd option, but that could be a dodgy time for PAWS and such to rear their bastard heads. so i might try and mantain on as low a dose as poss until the interviews etc are over. then do the rattle, and hopefully feel human enough to start the course in september ?

My god ive switched and changed so many drugs this week or so its no wonder im all over the place.
 
How you finding the mirtazepine MDB? Doc wanted to put me on it but I wasn't keen so never filled the prescription.

Edit - was prescribed it as I was getting anxiety/panic attacks maybe once or twice a month. I wanted something like diazepam or a beta blocker (to take as and when needed) as I felt having to take daily antidepressants was just overkill. I gave up in the end as I saw several doctors and all of them were only willing to prescribe antidepressants.
 
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mirtazapine is meant to be good for calming down and for sleep, and also for lessesning the desire for other drugs. So i thought that sounds like a good un to me. have only just comnpleted the switchover. So is far too early to say yet. There was 9 days of reducing sert wgilst after about day 6 mitr gradually got introduced and dy 7 sert got dropped.. Im on full doses of mirt from today onwards. I expect it'll take 2 -4 weeks to really know how its gonna feel. And thats only if i van drop the bupe and benzos too. :\ never gonna happen in the nect 2 weeks

The point about the bupe i was trying to make twas that it would surely kill any dodgt ant depressant switch feelings. A bit like using a sledge hammer ro put a drawing pin in a wall tho.

ive got a huge list of list of stuff to talk to my drugs worker about. Shes either gonna be very desposdent or very happy depending how she she views her work. My other counslkeoor loves it when i make coherent litsts and paragraphs of all the stuff thats been troubling me over the last week.

i took all oof 2 nights planned phenaz in night last night. Gonna have to be careful how i move around, or theree'll be fall a plenty if im not cardfulk. Might ask my 80 yr old neihbor to not=rrow hwer spare stick by=ur=t no doubt she'll look at me in a weird wat ( she always does anayway) a broom handle will do. :)
 
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curious_24 said:
was prescribed it as I was getting anxiety/panic attacks maybe once or twice a month. I wanted something like diazepam or a beta blocker (to take as and when needed) as I felt having to take daily antidepressants was just overkill. I gave up in the end as I saw several doctors and all of them were only willing to prescribe antidepressants.
Click to expand...

Mirtazepine is actually not bad for that purpose, IME.

Very rapid-acting, onset in 30-45 minutes, can be quite strong if you get the dosage right (less is often more with this one, 7.5mg should be a good start). If you take them daily, you'll just develop tolerance to the sedative fx. Tis an interesting compound.
 
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Down to a mg or less per day now and all is well on the western front. I'm going to take a half mg tomorrow and see how I get on with that. I've also managed to fill my timesheet for this week/next week, so I'll be nice and busy, which is distracting me from the notion of taking kit no end. I'll keep you all informed as to how I'm fairing. Feeling good, looking better, eating plenty and feeling chirpy as fuck. Hooray for subs.
 
Bupe is amazing, been on 12mg suboxone for a few weeks and just feel normal off it, no hit & barely fiended for brown, possibly cause i know it'l have no effect if i do use. Giving me a much needed chanc to sort the rest of my life out before i start detoxing so hopefully i won't relapse, highly recommended to those who genuinely want to quit :)
 
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