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Say something you can't say to their face

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You looked me in the eyes and told me you couldn't promise me that you won't talk to another woman in a romantic way. 16 months and it's proven to be so difficult for you to be loyal. Why am I still here? What are we actually accomplishing together?
 
Yeah. I'm sorry man. Really sorry. You were the best guy I worked with and I fucked it up. You were fun, polite, and patient. Obviously been through a bit yourself and felt I couldn't get to know you better because of the barriers if work. I had my own stuff going on and felt because my job wasn't challenging enough I could come in hungover and not care too much. I mean, I did care and I do feel guilt. Lots of guilt actually. I left you in a shit position because i was careless and didn't want to confront my mistake and letting you down was the worst feeling. Mostly because I looked up to you. I don't normally look up to people either. But my mistakes cut deep and I beat myself up even though I knew it would be OK. Failure for nr is personal. I'm sorry man. Hope we can have a pint somewhere in the future.
 
So I mean, we haven't spoken a while. If I had to be honest, I still think about fucking you because tbf, it was the nicest part of being with each other. I like our talks but you wanted them more than we could create them. But the thing is, you never got to understand my mind. You rushed me and forced your way under my layers. Sure, you broke through and saw what was under neath. You were strong enough to get through. You were the first to see such insecurity and sadness. But what you didn't see when digging was the fragility of my soul. I don't think you understood. To get things you would demand. From what I've learnt, you can't rush or force anything despite how broken or open you are. Things happen best when left to its own devices.
Still, I loved you and still think about you. I don't know what you're doing now but I feel you will be happy with someone, get that good job n be pretty stable. I believed in you and enjoyed following your life and achievements when together. It's nice to see someone grow.
Hope all is well. Ps I still can't find a better ass than yours. Xx
 
It’s not all me. And yet you are so honest..
You can’t simply choose to selectively shut the problem you want to avoid discussing-
 
You said something last night that showed me exactly who you are. There were reasons I've had my doubts and a reason I put space between us to try to get some clarity. What you said is something that will never ever make me give you another chance. I am not desperate for a man. I won't put up with just anything so I won't be alone. It's quite clear you don't deserve me. It's all good though. I'm not angry or bitter. Thank You God for showing me exactly who I was dealing with and closing that door for good. Bigger and better opportunities are on the way.

I don't even want a relationship. It's a distraction and a waste of time. Now I'm free to pursue my dreams and focus on my purpose.
 
Life is full of surprises. I always had it in my head that I was barren or that my womb was too full of pharmaceuticals to even sustain a life. Well, now we know what's up and you've been incredibly supportive during the hardest thing we've both had to face. You've been amazing and I'm blessed to have someone like you right now. I can only look at it as something I will go through to make me stronger so I'm able to encourage other women going through the same thing. I can't be a parent, not now. It wouldn't be fair to a child.
 
Any angst or issues I have with you; I willl telll you - why would you doubt that I dont have youre back when Im honest with you to your face. This is why im honest with you - I will never let you down on front of others. im sorry you doubt that I will.


It will never happen.
 
I wish that you would stop trying to contact me. I have moved on. I am atleast a couple hundred of miles away, so why even bother trying.
 
You didn't know if we were going to get back together and you loved me unconditionally anyway. We weren't ready to have a child yet, but out of a difficult situation, we are closer than ever now and much stronger. I love you.
 
You didn't know if we were going to get back together and you loved me unconditionally anyway. We weren't ready to have a child yet, but out of a difficult situation, we are closer than ever now and much stronger. I love you.

Hope you're ok, chicka? <3
 
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