• Bluelight
    Shrine




    A memorial
    to Bluelighters
    who have passed away

RIP ektamine

aww... fuck... I don't know what to say.

I didn't know him well, but he was one of the first people I met on here when I joined a little over a month ago. I talked to him a couple of times about the Marines, he said he was thinking about enlisting...

He seemed like a really intelligent person, always positive, and had a great future ahead of him... this makes me so sad that his life was cut short, even though I barely knew him this whole thread makes me cry. I know he's in a better place now though and it's comforting to know that at least he was happy when it happened...

R.I.P. ektamine. :( <3 :( <3
 
very sad news, I enjoyed reading his posts, he was one of the cool guys who welcomed me to this forum :(
RIP man
 
Tyler-SC said:
My Brother's memorial is this coming Saturday. Those of you who knew my brother knew him in a different way than I did and had your own unique relationships with him. Although most (maybe all) of you didn't know my brother in person I can see that the friendship many of you had with my brother was no less deep or real than if you had known him in person. While you knew my brother solely through the internet, you were not just 'internet friends' you were his friends and you knew him in a way that many people in Santa Cruz did not. I would encourage those of you who knew my brother well to consider writing something to be read or displayed at his memorial. Whether it be about Caleb as a person, what he meant to you/your relationship with him, or his contribution to the Bluelight community I know my family and I would greatly appreciate your contribution.

I'm looking towards Theotherside, Gavatron, Skillz~4~Thrillz, Laika, and Nekointheclouds but would appreciate a contribution from anybody in the BL community. I understand if nobody feels comfortable contributing but I want to stress to you that the BL community was, as far as I can see, a valuable part of Caleb's life and the connections he made here were important.
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Hi Tyler,

Sorry I came in too late to contribute, but have been off the Net for awhile. I really liked Caleb and wish I could have gotten to know him in person... we live on the same coast albeit a couple states away. I feel he was my closest friend on Bluelight and that we hit it off really well from the beginning. He was so intelligent and 'knew the score' and I think the realest part of him was always at peace. Here's wishing all of you peace as well.

P.S. this event has genuinely convinced me to be much more careful with any further substance use, particularly the quasi-legal substances that seem safe but have hidden risks. This has changed my outlook on substance use.

For Ektamine -- genuinely <3 felt. With love and best wishes to his family and friends.
 
nekointheclouds said:
This is my first time loosing a BLer I knew pretty well.

RIP, seriously.

I'm not going back to the MDPV threads again.

And I'm not going back to PeeVee either.

Goodbye Etkamine.
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Good for u Neko, hope u stick with it.

Wish I could say the same, but things are going to be different. No more vaping/smoking MDPV, and I intend on being far more cautious. I no longer trust it as a drug to be casual with, and am going to treat it as the powerful substance it is from now on... or not use it at all. Period. Someone died... no more "caution to the wind" roller coaster rides.
 
I was just reading some of his posts today too, man....

I will keep him and his family in my prayers.

He hasn't left us or anyone. Energy and consciousness cannot be destroyed.
RIP
 
MDPV is a very powerful stimulant that is know to cause compulsive and often unintentional/unknowing redosing... its sorta like cocaine but stronger... most pure forms of drugs are very potent... everyone needs to both be educated... as dear ektamine was very sharp... but drugs are to be used with respect... once you think "ehh fuck it let's try it" your screwed..

Research the drugs your going to do... or are already doing... chances are you'll not only be safer... but you'll have a much better experience...

WIN-WIN.... FTW!

Stay safe my brothers and sisters... =D
 
Ektamine,


I wore your icon in great honor for a month. Its been a long road traveled my friend. I loved away from memphis and swore to myself that when I was a month clean pf MDPV I would change it.


I finally changed it. Its a drawing of my own. I;m in control now. I like to think you would be proud of me my friend.

You are still missed.
 
Ektamine, You had just become a mod on here and were so excited about it.... since I just got an OD mod spot, I will dedicate my modship to making sure that everyone on here stays safe and aware of the dangers of RC's... and that even when we think we are in control, oftentimes we aren't.

I hope you found the peace in death that alluded you in life. Your family and all your friends are in my thoughts. You are tangibly gone, but you live on in our hearts and minds.
 
Another bluelighter mentioned this to me last night. I never saw this thread somehow, in the past few months. Very sad news, but some lovely words written in this thread, and on the facebook link etc.

The MDPV cartoon he did is one of the most hilarious and awesome things I have seen on BL. RIP Breh.
 
Our trajectories seemed to be arcing in the same manner as I was intrigued by MDPV, speaking as a contemporary. I never knew him, probably only posted once in the same thread, nevertheless his death affected me in a way that I am saddened by beyond my current understanding. I feel life is heavily influenced whether we like it or not by reciprocities and the entire thing is oftentimes at best, a cruel give and take. I just want it to be known that I feel I am alive today and currently mentally well possibly only due to Caleb's death and my subsequent reflection upon my own mortality.
 
alexvolume2 said:
Our trajectories seemed to be arcing in the same manner as I was intrigued by MDPV, speaking as a contemporary. I never knew him, probably only posted once in the same thread, nevertheless his death affected me in a way that I am saddened by beyond my current understanding. I feel life is heavily influenced whether we like it or not by reciprocities and the entire thing is oftentimes at best, a cruel give and take. I just want it to be known that I feel I am alive today and currently mentally well possibly only due to Caleb's death and my subsequent reflection upon my own mortality.
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From the bottom of my heart I thank you. My son's death has created ripples beyond imagination, just as his short, intense life did. Here in our home we have a physical shrine for our beautiful son/brother/friend and one of the pieces of writing that I look at the most says,

" What I thought was an end turned out to be a middle.
What I thought was a brick wall turned out to be a tunnel.
What I thought was an injustice turned out to be the color of the sky."

I don't even know who wrote it or I would assign credit--but it doesn't really matter--one human writing a truth that all of us know in some part of our understanding.

I will copy down your words from this post and put them on his wall here at home. It will weave another strand into the net our family counts on.<3

P.S. Would you consider anonymously posting that in his online obituary? That is a place his father goes for comfort and after the initial rush of condolences of course, it has stopped. It is up for 1 year and I know that a message like this would bring so much peace to his father as well as many other relatives that are still grappling with his death in daily struggle. That goes for any other BLers BTW.
 
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