Empathogens, alcohol, cannabis, crack, meth, amp, hallucinogens, inhalants - All drugs I have done with other people
Empathogens, alcohol, cannabis, crack, hallucinogens - All drugs I would prefer to do with other people
In practice, these issues tend to have me using alone.
With alcohol, crack, meth & amp, my usage simply scares the shit out of people. By the time I am high they are freaking out, and I still want to get a lot higher.
Alcohol. Most of the time I have had people who care about me in my life who believed I should never drink, so regardless of what I wanted I had to drink in secret, thus I mostly use this alone. When I drink, I drink for oblivion and usually hit it. Sometimes I fall short of that mark and end up an anti-social monster, with violent self-destructive behavior, so I really should never drink, or if I do I should drink alone.
Crack, meth and amp are sexually very active for me, and I haven't had a sex partner who used since my early twenties. Once I get to a certain high with these, I want to fuck or fap and not much else, so default to fapping for a long time now.
Circumstances recently have me living alone, in a city with no friends or family, with no one to party with anyways. So I drink and tweak and masturbate and blackout and nobody but me gets hurt. If I had a wish to fill, it would be for a great friend to live nearby who is into smoking herb and taking a hit of something new or an old fav like MDMA or LSD once in awhile.
I am glad I found bluelight, I feel much less alone since I started lurking here every day.