☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Trans-dimensional Hyperspace Cocktail Bar - Fractals Apply Within

[Morninggloryseed]

I cannot believe I waited all this time to try 5meodmt via an skin shot. Its really really good this way. It inspired me to make a cover of Dylan's Sara. Dedicated to CBD of course, and I'll get my singer to add vocals tonight.


https://soundcloud.com/morninggloryseed/saramxd

 

[Roger&Me]

I did ~26mg and while I didn't have any heart or body temperature irregularities, I was pretty nauseas, and I occasionally had some mild seizure-like "brain zaps" that were highly reminiscent of those I've had coming off of SSRIs, so maybe there's some correlation there to monoaminergic mishaps, particularly in the higher dose range? However, I've felt those zaps on DMT too, so maybe there's nothing significant going on.

now that i think about it this was circa 2009, and i was experimenting with a lot of nootropics back then, so that might have something to do with it. there is a distinct possibility i had some piracetam or something like that in my system at the time. also could have been psychosomatic (i mean i don't have any actual data like body temperature or heart rate or anything), so could have been in my head. i dunno, i will say it scared me enough not to repeat.

 

[Thanatos]

Any try hot-7 recently? It's got out of this world potential, but to get there I have heart attacks along the way. Same with last weekend trips.... Maybe I need more time away from jail to have a proper trip.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

I haven't really experienced it sober, though

Darn, because it happens to me sober, daily. Maybe it's because I'm the type that gets more emotionally invested in fiction than Real Life^TM.

Finally got a refill, and the benzos have left me feeling normal, hooray! Still jealous of your tales of psychedelia, it's been about a year now since I last tripped. Though there would be some heavy stuff likely to confront me, I would like to jump back in when the opportunity arises.

 

[construct]

I hear you, it's been about a year since I've tripped as well. Unfortunately it seems to unleash so much unwanted noise for me (though I guess that's kinda the point, doors of perception and so on) that I usually have pretty frequent and unpleasant feelings of insanity/becoming unhinged. Hopefully in the next couple years I will have a genuine and confident desire to trip again, I miss exploring that fertile ground.

 

[Roger&Me]

i haven't tripped properly since about 2009. tbh, the only drug i touch nowadays is weed. don't really feel like i need anything else these days. maybe i'll eat a few grams of shrooms or something sometime, i don't really see myself tripping balls out again.

 

[phenethylo J]

I had a T7 trip recently, first heavy dose one in a long time. Stuff BLEW me away hard, never ego loss but a form of dissociated identity....I remember it all clearly but at the time I became dissociated from my memories and periods of my life...so I was left thinking about how I got here based on limited information, a whole decade was gone at one point in the evening.

T7 is something that interests me. I really love 2c-t2, it's a great drug for being outdoors during the night time. usually I prefer to trip alone but find T2 is an excellent group drug. Is T7's come up sickness worse than T2.

I also want to try T4; got some stashed away but haven't sampled it yet. I heard from a friend say it is more of a roll than a trip.


I'm probably going to dose some mda some time soon. I was going to last week but ate some 2c-b instead.

I'm planning to do some dmt on the peak. The short duration of the dmt will be good because I wont have to worry about tripping while I'm coming off the mda.
Thinking of doing 120-130mgs oral of mda, 15-20mgs of dmt, and 1/2g-1g of k.

Would this combo cause issues with the heart because I do have blood pressure and heart rate issues sometimes but no actual condition that I know of? I have done similar combos and been fine. The only time I was very worried about my heart on mda was when I was younger and stupidly took a massive dose.

 

[twelvesevndi]

32 mg mxe and BBC's "secrets of our planet" ... jah!

Any good recent documentary suggestions?

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Rog its so nice to have you back.
I cant believe I got banned for literally asking someone (a staff member, however) just if white powder heroin is easily available in LA and what it costs out there, because I heard CA/the west coast and southwest is all tar heroin, except for "gunpowder" tar...
Yeah, because I'm gonna try to source drugs from a mod on here when I can get the drug that I supposedly tried sourcing, with a 15 minute drive and a phone call, whenever I want it as long as it isn't past midnight or so. Someone just thinks they're SO cool because they get obviously such "fire" "china white" that they have to do quarter gram shots and can still type/post after that..
cracka please.
I now cant stand that staff member, I think what did it was teh fact that when he ignored my PM asking about the white scene in LA, i sent him another PM saying
"Ok mister super cool, I see that you're so well connected that you cant even just explain whether or not white heroin exists in LA, and you're obviously the only one who can get white heroin on BL, so mister cool with your "fire china white", heres what I got before I quit, and it took me $25-30, and a 15 minute drive to meet my man"

NSFW:

I sent him that pic to prove that I can get what I asked him about on my own, probably easier than he can get it himself, and more than likely better quality than what he gets.
I'm glad I quit though for real, I am starting to feel better now and crave less.
That dude mad cause I'm stylin on him, he mad cause I had fire manteca hookups and that he's not the only person who can get white heroin.
and it was after the 2nd PM that I got infracted which resulted in a ban. One point infraction.

 

[Roger&Me]

That dude mad cause I'm stylin on him, he mad cause I had fire manteca hookups and that he's not the only person who can get white heroin.

jealous got llama strapped

he jus mad cuz u shinin bro

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

he's mad because he thinks he's so cool for getting "china white" in LA, when out here, I can get white heroin easier than any other drug (although out here, its just dope and like you know how stamps are..you just buy bags, and most of the time, at least 50% of the time, its offwhite/white, if not white it's light tan in color, always powder, and the color doesnt affect the price or the quality/potency)
I quit though, my clean date is October 25, 2013, and thats not counting the week I spent in detox where I recieved methadone for 7 or 8 days and valium for the first four days. The last time I used heroin was the day I went to rehab, right before I went in, I showed up TRASHED.
That dude si a tool anyway, eh probably buys his so called "china white" on the internet, and his dope sounds like trash if you can shoot a quarter gram and still be coherent enough to post clearly and shit. Although a quarter gram isn't that much, I'm sure I've shot a quarter gram before (but idk, because we just buy it by the bag and bags aren't sold by weight...) but that would have been when I was at my worst point in my addiction and I was shooting every day, at least once a day, and one shot for me to get high was at least 5 bags, generally 6 or 7 to get real fucked up when I was really bad on the dope.

It feels nice to be free of drugs though. Heroin made me its bitch for almost as long as I used it, and my life was completely unmanageable on heroin and my life revolved around working and getting money just to get high for 2-3 hours a day, if I was lucky. I overdosed for the first time before I went to rehab this last time and that scared the living shit out of me. 2 bags had me stop breathing (according to the kid who I was with when I shot it, and I had been using with this kid for a year when that happened, and he knew that I didn't just fall out, he said I started turning blue and he had to do mouth to mouth on me twice because he resussitated me once via mouth to mouth/rescue breathing and then I stopped breathing again a few minutes after the first round of breathing for me and he stopped the car again and did mouth to mouth again till i was breathing on my own, then rushed over to the hospital and I came to in the parking lot of the hospital, and he told me he was about to carry me into the ER if I didn't wake up when I did, and he waited 10 minutes before we left the hospital parking lot after I came to just to be sure that I wasnt going to go out again. True friend, he saved my life I'm sure, because I would have died had he not been there. and my disease was so fucked up that the next day I copped the same bags and told my dealer what happened and laughed about it, when even he was like really? you gotta be more careful mayne and I was just like lol no I know what i'm doing..)

I never thought I'd end up the way I did. I remember posting in here when jatty jat and shit was here talking about his heroin addiction being like "I'd never do heroin, I'd never shoot heroin, I'll never be a heroin addict, I wouldn't even like heroin since I hate painkillers, heroin is so dirty and disgusting, etc." and thats exactly what happened to me, and it happened to me quick. It didn't take long before I was snorting heroin every night, and then not long after that I got caught, got clean for a month, then got better connects and better dope and went to the needle...
I fucked my life up with heroin and I'm trying to pick up the pieces, but its hard for me. Every day I know I could use and the temptation is strong but I've been fighting it as best I can through a recovery program and medication (not subs/methadone).
I'm sick of hurting the people I love, especially the most amazing girl in the world who loves me, but hates me when I'm using and who I put through so much shit from my using.

 

[Roger&Me]

I remember posting in here when jatty jat and shit was here talking about his heroin addiction being like "I'd never do heroin, I'd never shoot heroin, I'll never be a heroin addict, I wouldn't even like heroin since I hate painkillers, heroin is so dirty and disgusting, etc."

i remember when you did OC for the first time, you were so itchy and pissed off lol

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Rog i tried oc only once before i was a bler. I know the last time i used oxycodone i mighta been on bl though.
I didnt try heroin till like early 2012, right after i quit dexedrine. And for a few months i was only sniffing ehh quality bags and i didnt have a real problem until a few months of doin that. Then i changed and started to become a junkie. Then eventually i turned into a scumbag dopefiend and my addiction controlled my life and my mind completely. I regret getting into heroin. It was the biggest mistake i ever made and i ruined my life chasing the high

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

unpleasant feelings of insanity/becoming unhinged.

I get that sober, to an extant, hence the benzos. But yeah I dig you that confronting particularly difficult material can be too exhausting. I'm sure the time will be right once again, just keep on movin' until then.

the only drug i touch nowadays is weed. don't really feel like i need anything else

That sounds like a good place to be in. Maybe I'll be there someday, instead of having cannabis as an uncommon special treat. If I wanted to use something regularly, convenience would lead that to being crystal, and my feelings on the matter are ambivalent.

Oh, what happened to that educating you were doing or whatever? I remember last year you were in a rough patch or something over it. Life less precarious these days (no matter what you are doing)? I hope so.

my addiction controlled my life and my mind completely

Many of us have been there at some point, in varying capacity. You find out your everything is poison, but by that point it's all you have, and can going clean solve whatever issue brought you to addiction in the first place? Shit ain't easy.

I can't say I regret anything personally, maybe I've done a few low life things I'm ashamed of, but I know what it is to be desperate. And for getting into particularly risky ones in the first place, well, curiosity made insatiable by inner emptiness was gonna lead to what it was gonna lead to. And it will lead where it will in the future. I'm not gonna grieve over it one way or the other. I guess I'm a bit of a fatalist.

I spent the latter trip listening to classical music, and halfway through I listened to some Eastern Music with more notes than the twelve tone scale we know today. As it hit the quarter tones of the scale that I'd never really heard before it literally felt like my brain was shocked! it was as if now my association complex could relate more things I've heard/felt/seen in my life to this new data.

Sounds awesome, though I don't have the musical knowledge to appreciate such a thing.


P.S. I can nap again, thank GABA! Gotta appreciate those small things.

 

[Roger&Me]

Oh, what happened to that educating you were doing or whatever? I remember last year you were in a rough patch or something over it. Life less precarious these days (no matter what you are doing)? I hope so.

yeah i graduated, now i'm a businessfag in a data-related field. decided not to go to chem grad school. may go for an MBA some day. things are going okay i guess, all in the past year i've exmatriculated, broke up with my gf of 6 years, changed fields completely, might be moving soon. things are just kinda like damn i'm grown up now when the fuck did this happen and how am i going to deal with it. trying my best to stay sane. in a lot of ways i still feel and think like a child inside of my head, its like cognitive dissonance to the max.

i may have made things out to be worse than they actually were due to adderall meltdown / stress / residual benzo-wd weirdness/ etc in those posts last year lol

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Rog man im just glad youre relatively ok and alive.

 

[SONN]

I drank a lot of coffee before my last 4-aco-dmt experience which allowed me to participate in intelligent discussions a lot better than If I hadn't, I was articulating words I'd never even said or thought of before incredibly fast it was awesome. The 5ht2a agonism caused my brain to draw so many subconscious associations so fast that it led me to new thoughts and ideas and points of reference. It was beautiful. I recently took a class on "the Classics" of ancient greece and rome and my mind was firing super fast comparing all of the things I was talking about in my political discussion with my friend to all the political practices of ancient greece and rome. I was learning things I truly wouldn't have without the chemical stimulation making the connections in my brain and I fucking loved it

however the coffee and chocolate I ate that day made the come up super jittery to the point where I could see my stomach actually twitching, and on the comedown that started to creep me out because the twitches were making their way up to my face and I thought my personal safety was in danger.

That's when I decided to tranquilize my body with 2mg of xanax and everything got even more colorful and I literally could see so many brighter hues and differences in hue that I cant typically see that it was seriously allowing me to see things at a higher visual resolution than I experience on a normal day.

It felt like a soul vitamin, by the end of the trip the classical music we were listening to was so heartwrenching I cried for all of the people who might listen to that piece of music and not feel the beautifully intense upheaval of emotion and experience I was having at that moment.

I cried for all the people that cant feel emotions because of the physical wiring of their brain not allowing those connections to be made, and it felt kinda good. (right before the xanax)

then after the xanax I went and partied and ate some good ass food and did some k at a 'house-rave' where there were laser shows and loud music and it was fun but nowhere near as fulfilling feeling as the fucking heartwarming trip I had earlier.

gonna have one of the strongest LSD trips of my life tomorrow, wish me luck

 

[Roger&Me]

Rog man im just glad youre relatively ok and alive.

thanks bro

lol did y'all think i was dead or something? i thought i remembered to post in here about how i was planning to take a bl break

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

Got a job, and worked it for several hours. I am learning the first of what I assume to be many responsibilities for my position as restaraunt lackey who will fill in holes in the weekly schedule (if I am not fired first, being not naturally a customer service type, and since my learning ability is likely impacted by my benzo induced calmness).

yeah i graduated, now i'm a businessfag in a data-related field. decided not to go to chem grad school. may go for an MBA some day. things are just kinda like damn i'm grown up now when the fuck did this happen and how am i going to deal with it.

I see, well I'm glad there is not continuing drug related strung-outness due to schooling (I maintain schools are extremely detrimental to mental health, for some of us). As for doing something other than what you figured you would, that's par for the course in the academic system. I cannot relate at all to anything relationship-y so I grant you stilted, and hopefully greeting card quality condolences,: I'm sure you feel sucky, but perhaps now you can casually explore someone with desirable attributes conspicuously absent in the ex? As John D. Rockefeller said, "I always tried to turn every disaster into an opportunity."

Being a bussiness-fag sounds most acceptable. Stability, possibility for advancement (at least with continued education, maybe as things are), a living wage...though moving can be an intimidating/exciting prospect. I imagine it could even be pleasant if you get in with a company you like, or a corporation with a pro-social ethos (hint: you are not allowed to work for Monsanto).

Interesting on the sensation/acute mental awareness of adulthood. That transition is not something that society prepares us for anymore, or ever happens with some people, and I am certainly a long way off, displaying many mental attributes of an extended adolescence (though I might more poetically describe myself as living a life of dissipation and aimlessness,a life common to those who are unable to believe in anything, and entirely removed from the socially constructed maturity spectrum). I wonder if I'll ever be where you're at, or if you are where you're at and just don't think you are? Now I'm rambling...

did y'all think i was dead or something?

Nah, I heard you were taking a BL break. Now, willow I worried was dead or imprisoned until his recent stop by, and now Psox has been absent for a while, but I know he gets into some hermit-y things, and assume things are going well or that he is reevaluating/wilderness sabbatical.

Awesome tripping

Stay on the good vibesy-wave man, and I'm glad to hear how things have been going.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

So I was sitting on some balcony at local uni earlier (now on benzos), which I haven't done in quite some time. Same one I used to sit at whilst waiting for my GBL redose to kick in while drinking a coke zero and smoking back in the day (and later sat at while getting drunk with cheap liquor diluted with the same beverage), and it struck me that most of the kids who were attending back then have graduated and left by now. It made me think of The Catcher in the Rye, when Holden was saying how the natural history museum always stayed the same, and his appreciation of it was largely derived from how he changed between visits. I wondered, if any of those kids took the time to notice me back then, and visiting again today saw me there, would they take comfort in the fact that some things never change?

Of course some things change, the GABAergic I'm indulging in, the purple leaf plum that used to be planted adjacent the balcony, that once gave so much pleasure from seeing a bird perched atop a bare branch in winter is gone, the vending machine that used to be up there is now on ground level, and who knows how much else is different. But still that same random guy was sitting there at night. Maybe a lot of the addicts I've met are like that, so many people are always moving on to something new, but we're always fighting the good fight with something in us, something that is us, that can never be defeated, so we're fundamentally the same in this crazy dynamic world. Perhaps there is beauty in that.