lol i feel old as shit
even though i know that my adult life is really still just beginning... such a weird thought because i feel like i've already lived several full lives. if i died tomorrow it wouldn't be any big thing, i'd just look back on it all and smile.
Right? I'm pretty young but I feel the same way. When having those tripped out discussions about life and inevitably death, I would always say how it wouldn't be terrible if I moved along as I've essentially lived the life I wanted to and done many things I've wanted, not to mention been graced to experience things many people could never even imagine. Of course there have been bumps along the road, some pretty large, but what sort of road doesn't have at least a few rocks lining it? Either way I'm eternally grateful for my experiences and if death is looming at my door so be it, nothing I can do about it, that I know of anyway! Admittedly, I've always been secretly excited to "know" what comes when ones physical life ends as well, in a sense it would be the epitome of life's mystery. Also always felt just like you said Roger, that I've lived multiple lives already. Might be due to the fact that I've made humor and fun such a large component of my life, besides the fact I'm god damn weird so doing strange note worthy things(to me) comes natural.
I was honestly really glad to see both you posting again. Psox more so though(sorry rog but I had a feeling you be back ;p)because I didn't think I would see you posting again. Also glad to see those epic posts, besides the fact their good reads, they make me feel better about tossing out dem paragraphs. Things got a little weird in life for me and I ended up barely posting for some months as well though I tried to jump on to answer what I could, always gotta Help?!? at least a bit!
Also sucks to see so many PDer's to fall into the benzo regime. I myself was abusing Etizolam somewhat for a few months nearly daily but ran out a couple months back and decided not to grab anymore as that's obviously the best choice to make, especially at the time. Sucks to just have that fog and realize your beginning to not recall things nearly as crisply or quickly as usual. Shit just helped with my nerve pain though and no mother fucker wants to give me Pregabalin even though I've had it before. Thankfully somehow as usual my body proved to be extremely abnormal as I had pretty much zero withdrawals from that stint, bizarre stuff per usual. Hopefully tomorrow though someone will throw me a damn bone so I can get things back on track. Either way I kinda fucked up and ordered some Etizolam as I doubt it will happen and I need to start working out/etc and get dat apathy the fuck off my back!
Edit: Meant to add as well that fire reminds me of the largest one I've seen which was possibly a bit higher than that and definitely wider(bit hard to tell from a picture obviously). At a fest I was at some people, tripping most likely, threw all of their gear including chairs onto their fire creating an absolutely massive bon fire. It was in a forest too so I'm surprised security didn't do anything.
Time dilation is one of my favorite chemical effects. It's so awesome when you realize you've seemingly literally had innumerable amounts of complete thought patterns in your mind feeling like aeons could have passed then you gander at the clock and only a minute or two has actually passed!
