☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Trans-dimensional Hyperspace Cocktail Bar - Fractals Apply Within

[Morninggloryseed]

I feel so awful right now. Not just the 3meo hangover but a lot of other emotional baggage has piled up I feel. I'm glad I don't have a gun, I think if I did I would put a bullet in my head tonight.

Chalk it down to a lesson learned the hard way, learn from it and move on. I'm going through bouts of the same feelings man but we are all in this together.

 

[pharmakos]

Wish I had some marijuana on hand. I know it would instantly make me feel better. I have some of my BB-22(cannabinoid)/mullein/raspberry leaf blend left, but I know its just going to make me feel worse

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

. I'm glad I don't have a gun, I think if I did I would put a bullet in my head tonight.

Just don't hang yourself. Seriously. Never consider it for even a second, no matter what. I mean, you sound you're just saying your hangover sucks, but as life goes on, take this piece of advice if you ignore everything else I've ever said.

I'm going to see him today for what could be one of the last times.... Wish me and him luck.

I'm sorry, my condolences. My grandfather died from lung cancer and resultant complications a couple years ago. It was sad to see him decline, though he was always in good spirits, just wish he didn't start refusing visitors as the end got near. His wife (my step-grandmother) was the same way with her kidney failure, the distance can really hurt those close to them. Don't let that happen, and steadfastly offer your love.

 

[pharmakos]

Yeah, hanging would be a horrible way to die. If I ever do off myself its going to have to be instantaneous and foolproof. I've tried to kill myself via drug overdose a couple times and it wasn't fun (nor successful, obviously)

 

[Roger&Me]

I'm glad I don't have a gun, I think if I did I would put a bullet in my head tonight.

i also feel like this more often than i would care to admit. the extent of the darkness in the human soul is terrifying.

i know you've been going through a lot lately, man. but fight the good fight. you've got a good head on your shoulders, things will turn out okay for you. keep a little ember burning and later you can start a big ass fire with it

make yourself some tea and toast imho, back in the day B9 told me to do that in times of distress. it always makes me feel better

 

[Morninggloryseed]

Dude, I know. It's ridiculous how much of a medicine it is. I don't smoke much pot anymore because of finances and because of that, its DRAMATIC how much pot helps me. My buddy Bradley brought me over a bowl two nights ago and I got clear headed and snapped out of it for a good couple hours. I hate the voters of this state.

/me misses Colorado SOOOO much.

Wish I had some marijuana on hand. I know it would instantly make me feel better. I have some of my BB-22(cannabinoid)/mullein/raspberry leaf blend left, but I know its just going to make me feel worse

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

So friday night is socializing stay up drinking most of (or all, as alcohol gives me insomnia these days) the night....leading to getting up bright and early saturday morning for work. Why does it work out this way? I can't say Saturday is my favorite day of the week, not by a longshot. 8)%)

Yeah, hanging would be a horrible way to die.

Inebriation doesn't help. Suffocating is terrible enough, but people know that and still go for it. What they don't know is the strangulation itself is something the body has an innate reaction against. Like...this overwhelming pressure on your neck squeezing maybe breaking clamping of the windpipe that is not only an assault on your body, but encroaches on your very soul, which blindly recoils in horror. Fight or flight mortal danger mode. Mind screaming, piercing loud cuts through all thought primal wordless screaming, reverberating from the depths of the subconscious to the fringes of ego-awareness STOP make it STOP NOW how can I STOP this NOW.

All to Gershwin, who captured the swirling dancing crystalline rainbow transience of life so beautifully....





Let us never speak of this again. Thank you kindly. ^_^

 

[!!Lg09dU3o]

"As you approach the event horizon of the black hole (the point within which nothing can escape), truly bizarre things begin to happen. An outside observer who is very far away and watching you fall in will see your time slow down so much that it approaches a complete stop! To them, you will appear to slow down and freeze as you approach the event horizon, then fade away into darkness. It is as if their time were passing by infinitely faster than yours.

So when you look out at them, the rate at which you see their time passing will approach infinitely fast - however, this does not quite mean that you get to see the entire future of the universe evolve before your eyes. The problem is that there is no way for you to sit still at the event horizon. As soon as you get there, you are, by definition, pulled very quickly towards the center of the black hole. As this happens, you will be shredded to pieces and killed by the black hole's tidal forces (assuming this hasn't happened already), and furthermore, you will hit the singularity at the center of the black hole where nobody really knows what will happen to the material that used to be you! Whatever happens, you certainly won't get a chance to see or make sense of any of the light that is coming in from the outside." - David Rothstein, Department of Astronomy at Cornell University

 

[Help?!?!]

i also feel like this more often than i would care to admit. the extent of the darkness in the human soul is terrifying.

It surely is, it surely is. Many days I wish things were easier in the sense that I wish I could fade from this existence leaving no trace what so ever that I was ever here. It would simply be like everyone that knew me would have any remaining memories. Some ghostly sort of shit!

I'm losing touch with things again and I see shit tsunamis on the horizon...

 

[Xorkoth]

The day I've been planning has arrived... 3.2mg of DOC down the hatch! Made a solution for liquid measurement with some of my supply. I was overjoyed to find out upon opening the baggie that this batch of DOC consists of small crystals, rather than fine powder! The first time I ever got DOC it consisted of crystals that looked the same, and it was by far my best batch of DOC I've ever had! The two times I got some after that (but before this time) it was a fine powder and it was certainly DOC, and I had great times with it, but it wasn't as clear and beautiful.

Now I'm eating some yogurt and going to run and pick up a couple of things before it starts to effect me.

"As you approach the event horizon of the black hole (the point within which nothing can escape), truly bizarre things begin to happen. An outside observer who is very far away and watching you fall in will see your time slow down so much that it approaches a complete stop! To them, you will appear to slow down and freeze as you approach the event horizon, then fade away into darkness. It is as if their time were passing by infinitely faster than yours.

So when you look out at them, the rate at which you see their time passing will approach infinitely fast - however, this does not quite mean that you get to see the entire future of the universe evolve before your eyes. The problem is that there is no way for you to sit still at the event horizon. As soon as you get there, you are, by definition, pulled very quickly towards the center of the black hole. As this happens, you will be shredded to pieces and killed by the black hole's tidal forces (assuming this hasn't happened already), and furthermore, you will hit the singularity at the center of the black hole where nobody really knows what will happen to the material that used to be you! Whatever happens, you certainly won't get a chance to see or make sense of any of the light that is coming in from the outside." - David Rothstein, Department of Astronomy at Cornell University

I am so fascinated by black holes... I absolutely love thinking about that, and anything else about space.

I feel so awful right now. Not just the 3meo hangover but a lot of other emotional baggage has piled up I feel. I'm glad I don't have a gun, I think if I did I would put a bullet in my head tonight.

I have felt that way plenty of times too, especially late 2013, I fantastized about it every day. But now it's been a while, things are improving. The point of me saying this is that I'm hoping it will show you that things always improve. Well, they go through cycles, but given that you're at a low point now, it will get better. Hang in there.

 

[Solipsis]

Cool have a good trip!
I'm just on supplements and nootropics today and recovering from heavy training yesterday - wanna be clear and strong for MMA style competition tomorrow.
But on monday I might dabble :D

 

[Xorkoth]

So, my uncle was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer last weekend after a long period of mental illness (depression/anxiety) and physical trouble (weakness, nausea, dizziness etc). They had given him six months.

Unfortunately, its travelled to his brain and the prognosis is indicating around one month left. So sad! He has been a great person in my life, very fatherly to me and is a unique guy- very much holding onto aspects of the 60's counterculture in thought and dress- but a heavy cigarette smoker and pothead too. A sane and loving guy, a total contrast to his younger brother (who was my father).

I'm going to see him today for what could be one of the last times.... Wish me and him luck.

I'm sorry man. That's really hard. I haven't lost anyone really close me to yet, but my father (who I am very close to) was diagnosed with ALS less than a year ago, he can barely use his arms already and is getting quite weak. Within a few years I am going to have to deal with that. So far I have cried about it a few times but it doesn't really seem real yet, even as I'm thinking of the words to write here.

 

[Solipsis]

Hard to imagine..

 

[pharmakos]

couldn't fall asleep til like 8AM.... only slept 2 hours but i'm feeling immensely better now.... objectively my life still sucks, but subjectively i feel okay today. yay caffeine.



didn't read that bit about your uncle til just now willow.... i just lost an uncle to cigarette-induced esophagus cancer two months ago, its rough stuff. =/ good luck man.

 

[amanitadine]

Have fun Xorky! Chlorinated PEA's , alpha methyl or not, are always dear to my heart! Criminal chlorination 'n all enjoy!

Sorry to hear such willow...as a good jewboy like MGS I will keep him in my prayers....

It's always kind of a relief when the arylcyclohexylamines run out to those disposed to cain em, eh TNW? Stay well...you'll bounce back. Dissociatives are the opioids of psychedelics...or more aptly, they are just dissociatives, a league of their own! Pretty easy to get compulsive and lose the plot...all too easy....they offer the ultimate escape fantasy, masquerading as true mind manifesters....which they can be, but can also lay a velvet cloak over everything rather than revealing the inner goings on....tricky bastards...

happy Saturday!

 

[Morninggloryseed]

Yeah have fun Xork. If I had some cannabis I'd join ya (but with some 2C-C instead) but it's way too dry and I don't like to trip without it.

 

[Xorkoth]

It's been an intense afternoon watching some episodes of Carl Sagan's Cosmos... so far.

 

[xammy]

Im coming down of MDMA.. is it ok to take 5-htp tonight to get some sleep?

 

[Roger&Me]

i don't think its ever okay to take 5-htp tbph.

it is cardiotoxic without concurrent administration of something like carbidopa to prevent decarboxylation in peripheral tissue.i wish supplement companies would stop selling that stuff.

get some L-tryptophan to take after your next roll instead.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

Can't say I feel my best, but I'm aces compared to the torture of going to work hungover without stims. All is well. The wine would have been adequate on its own though, I needn't have involved the whiskey.

It would simply be like everyone that knew me would have any remaining memories

I used to think like this quite often! I could be forever beautiful in people's memory, so fading from this existence would be a way of preserving what dignity I had left.

Dissociatives are the opioids of psychedelics...or more aptly, they are just dissociatives, a league of their own! Pretty easy to get compulsive and lose the plot...all too easy....they offer the ultimate escape fantasy, masquerading as true mind manifesters..

They can induce depression IME, like GABAergics, letting you hide in a fantasy world and exacerbating whatever malady led you to them in the first place (exception: Jamshyd style dosing. Not that I've ever tried that).

It's been an intense afternoon watching some episodes of Carl Sagan's Cosmos... so far.

I'm jealous, I've still never seen that (I've watched segments of it online, and I have one of his books). Carl Sagan was a wonderful human being.

don't think its ever okay to take 5-htp tbph.

it is cardiotoxic without concurrent administration of something like carbidopa to prevent decarboxylation in peripheral tissue.

i wish supplement companies would stop selling that stuff

I don't keep up with supplements, what are its purported benefits and indications (outside of its applications by drug folk)?