☮ Social ☮ [PD Social General Talk Thread] Observation Tank for Fractallized Redundancy Modules

[Cream Gravy?]

Job orientation on Friday; I'm employed finally woooo.

 

[Xorkoth]

Alright man, sweet! What's the job?

 

[Cream Gravy?]

A minimum wage job as a cashier at a major retailer... Not what I plan on doing for too long, but until I can afford the payments to get my teaching certification, it's all I could find. The manager seemed to think I was keen enough in the interview though, that I could move up within a year and start making more. Hopefully I won't be there in a year

In the end, I want to teach, if anything so I can have a salary and still get summers off. Having a wage job is BS. On a teachers salary at least, I could make 40-50k a year, move out, buy my own car, get an engagement ring for the girlfriend, etc. For now, I'll be happy to buy a quarter of weed every two weeks and pay my folks some rent so they stay off my back 8)

 

[jammin83]

Glad you are ok voertech.


Got my TA today! woot!

After being fascinated by this chemical for around half of my life, I am amazed to have it in my possession. Hopefully all goes well. I think it will.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

And then when I was driving back I got T boned by a truck and totaled my car. A broken hand broken ribs and basically overall soreness.

That's terrible, did you at least get a good Rx out of it?


Eh, don't have the place to myself today as I thought I would, so there goes my plans for daytime drunkenness. I got my hands on a lil' gabapentin though, so 1000mg down the hatch. Let's see how the day goes, I've been wanting to try this one properly for a while.

 

[Help?!?!]

That's terrible, did you at least get a good Rx out of it?


Eh, don't have the place to myself today as I thought I would, so there goes my plans for daytime drunkenness. I got my hands on a lil' gabapentin though, so 1000mg down the hatch. Let's see how the day goes, I've been wanting to try this one properly for a while.

Haha, that was pretty much one of the first things I thought of, fucked or what?!?

You didn't take it all at once did you? You've gotta take it in increments or it won't be nearly as effective!

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

^I did take it all at once, the advice on that drug that a search pulled up was kinda wishy washy and unhelpful. How should I space it out? I intend to use the lil' bit I have for one more recreational experience (I wanna combine it with DXM), and save the remainder for small therapeutic doses in times of need. OTOH, given my profligate nature, I may not carry through with that intention.

In any case, I've been altered all day, and it seems to be quite euthymic. It's interesting stuff, sedating in a slightly dissociated kind of way. I should also note that I finally got my bupropion 'script refilled after neglecting it for several months, so I'm on that too, didn't take any seroquel yet today (I often take ~12.5mg to take the edge off of my day, and I take 50mg at night for sleep).

A minimum wage job as a cashier

Welcome to the club.

 

[Help?!?!]

I find it best(if TNpharmakos is around I'll bet he'll weigh in as well!)in around 100-300mgs doses spaced out around an hour give or take. I've tried all sorts of stacking but my personal favorite is with the three hundred mg pills. I'll take one every thirty to forty five minutes until I get to around a gram of two, then let that hit, and if I want more after a couple of hours, wash rinse/repeat.

Oh mang! I've been dosing small increments of 3-MeO-PCP for the past couple of days to help extend my pregabalin script(I wanted to save some for All Hallows' Eve!)but for the first time in awhile, I think I dosed a tad to much as I feel that strange state of inflated mania hitting/boiling into my mind for the first time, in sometime(not like you can't tell from this long non sensical ramble!). Just washed back a pregabalin I thankfully found under my chair because my count was off. I knew I did a half one fifty sublingual last night, but thought I had finished it since it was nowhere to be seen, but I checked under the chair since my count was off a couple, and I knew I wasn't that fucked up last night to miscount the bit I had left that bad. Ahh thank you God of lost chemicals for granting me this gift!

The weather channel app on my iPod also gave me a good laugh upon awakening today as well! Instead of telling me to watch out for clouds, precipitation, and other stuff for my daily forecast, it said to be careful to watch out for, "Ghosts, goblins, and other frights!". That got a good chuckle from me as I've never seen it do that. I'm thinking of heading out for a midnight dog stroll as well, to howl at the (nearly?) full moon too! Ahh how I love autumn and Halloween/October!

Oh and Solitsus, isn't Rick and Morty just the best?!? I love how they combine wacky science comedy with the depressing air of Rick's alcoholism, and how Morty's child like innocent optimism starts to sink into him. The finale was so fucking good with Hurt playing at the end as Rick...well does what he does! "Don't hate the game son, hate the player!"
How's everyone doing tonight?

 

[Yeetbeat]

Started work at 7:50am. Attempted to vacate for my lunch break at 12:30. Got to the foyer and the ACER tech I've been waiting on for a HDD replacement arrives. Ugh. Ok, easy thing to sort out. Swap HDD over, test (unsure if it was the fault now...lol), decide the ACER tech's job is done and if it's still farked I'd relog another warranty call so he gets paid to attend site again haha...

As I'm walking the ACER dude out, Star Track show up to collect 22 PCs and 44 monitors. Was expecting them, but was also expecting a call first to advise when they'd rock up. Spend half an hour moving all this shit from the loading bay into his truck.

Awesome, lunch time!

....nope, staff member needs assistance with the new PC I literally just deployed to her. Fair enough.

3:15pm and I finally get a chance to get out of my building. Went for a 15 minute walk around the apartment blocks and ponds over the road. Met a family of ducks. We're tight now.

Quack.

 

[Just A Guy]

Hahaha! I love it, Trozzle. I totally planned on going to bed early today, but I ended up finishing up the last of my 4-FA. (I had picked some up to help me concentrate on the 2000 miles of driving I did this last weekend.) And what a weekend! I traveled from Iowa to South Dakota and experienced the Black Hills, the Badlands, Mount Rushmore, and Crazy Horse. My best friend and I had arranged to meet up in South Dakota, and after our time there, we traveled south to Estes Park, Colorado, where he lives, and I enjoyed spending time with him and his family (of which I am his children's God Father.

I have to say, as a driving aid, 4-FA is great. Especially when everyone is sleeping in the car and you've got music playing and your mind wanders and thinks of all kinds of stuff...

 

[Help?!?!]

That sounds awesome JAG! Trozz, when I was quickly skimming your post before my midnight dog walk, I read Star Track as Star Trek, and had a good WTF moment before I realized I misread. There's defintely downsides to speed reading on droogs...

Man oh man...time! I hung out a bit with my mom which was nice but as always super depressing. She's still chain smoking, hacking, and breathing heavy. She'll soon be meeting the reaper... Another person I have to watch slowly struggle and grind until time steals them away as they fall further into substance abuse. I fucking hate it because she doesn't understand my chemical use and it scares her since she's so ignorant to it all. I've taught her and it's gotten better but I can no longer, sadly be truthful about what I do as its to much of a burden for her old mind. There's so much weight on these shoulders. In some ways I wish all the junk would finally clog my gears to the point where they can't stand the strain and I could finally move on... On the other hand I wouldn't mind continuing on if things could just ease up. If I could just get better support in many regards. Get into to PM so I won't have to constantly be in so much pain. I don't mind the loneliess as its always been there. In many ways I enjoy my solitude. Where I can just be alone with it all and dissociate into the dark pools and recesses of my inner mind. I wish for the apathy where everything is simply grey instead of black. Sometimes I just want to walk. Not stopping until my body can no longer move and I'm far away from everything in the woods. I'll fall and falter. Losing the strength to continue. Letting nature reclaim my body as nourishment for the earth. If there's anything after I'll meet it and rest there. Use whatever energy I have left to enevolpe the few great souls who let me rest once in awhile under the protection of their wings. Repay what was given. Time might be working with me though. I'll have the tools to make moves. To "accidentally" do to much because of my dark fiending nature. Everyone can just say, "Oh well, he was just a lost soul eternally seeking solace in things that towed the lines between living and dying. This time he made his last slip, the big mistake, and now he's dissappeared into the ethers only to be seen or remembered in those sporadic bursts of the waves of memory crescendoing into the walls of the mind, dissapating until they are no more and the only thing left will be the slight meetings in the hollows of dreamland...". Oh life! The hills and the hollows. The highs and lows. The bitter and the sweetness. The love and laughter. The misgivings and mistakes. The hate and the sorrow. All the dual it to this reality.

Nights like tonight are when I wish it could happen. Slipping away into the darkness and to be carried away by the cold water sliding down from the clouds in the sky.

Oh well. I guess I'll continue to move forward until I can't or maybe not. In the end I doubt it's very intergral...

At least there's this where I can come to let it rain down where I know there might be disdain and judgement but also hopefully a small bit of understanding....

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

I've been dosing small increments of 3-MeO-PCP for the past couple of days

I never had the opportunity to try that one, TBPH it doesn't sound that interesting to me when compared to 4-MeO-PCP, which I loved. For me it's all about the hole, and since that's a vague term, I only use it to describe those experiences where all contact with the external world is lost, 'cause when that happens my half-functional brain hallucinates a world that is much better than this one. Honestly, my once or twice yearly dissociative experiences (limited to DXM these last few years) are my only source of emotional fulfillment. Hahaha, that paints a nice picture of how f-ed up my life is, man, I haven't used a psychedelic in years either, since before my suicide attempts, I imagine a strong trip would do me some good, it might be a challenging experience but it would certainly be worthwhile. Too bad I no longer have access to such things.

 

[Help?!?!]

Yeah I feel you! That's why I love MXE, ket, and 4-MeO-PCP(to bad your just a bit too dirty in your receptor profile baby!). If I had MXE or a touch of ket things would be dandy. Low dose 3-MeO-PCP isn't bad though. Some euphoria with a distancing from emotion, the only bad thing is what you pointed out... You can't simply hold yourself into the oblivion of the outer ethers! Not a bad stand in though when nothing else is around! On All Hallows Eve I'll probably do a solid dose of 4-HO-MiPT, a touch of 3-MeO-PCP, and hopefully some DPT. If that happens I can get stoned to the bone too, which I haven't except for some light use over the past couple of months. I'm excited fit that too as my tolerance will be low!

I forget to tell you guises about some craziness that happened in September. I got some cash and was looking for a good vape for myself, and one that my mother could use so it would help her be more active, and wouldn't be so bad on her terribly damaged COPD ridden lungs. So I was cruising EBay and found a sweet super cheap Iolite vape that was used but in good condition. Got it cheap. Anyways, before it came I had this weird paranoid dream that the seller wasn't going to be smart enough to properly clean it out. When it came it's metal vape devices that came with it had some good hash left unbunrnt in it and another had some good looking, albeit slightly already caped bud bits in it. When I tested it, it produced a good couple bags of Buddha vapor that got me pretty lit. Gladly though no one looked at the package because with the crazy drug laws, we both could've probably been charged with transporting illegal SI goods and paraphernalia laws if some crazy overzealous zealot drug LE caught it....

Also lately I've been wondering what 4-MeO-PCPr or y would be like!

 

[vortech]

Ha, you guys, yeah I did get some good iv fent and dilaudid at the hospital but they only sent me home with 10 oxycodone 5mg, basically nothing for someone who has been on suboxone for going on 2 years which as you may know is a poor med for pain. Ibuprofen is the best answer but my ribs hurt so much tonight I couldn't even sleep.

 

[vortech]

Yeah I feel you! That's why I love MXE, ket, and 4-MeO-PCP(to bad your just a bit too dirty in your receptor profile baby!). If I had MXE or a touch of ket things would be dandy. Low dose 3-MeO-PCP isn't bad though. Some euphoria with a distancing from emotion, the only bad thing is what you pointed out... You can't simply hold yourself into the oblivion of the outer ethers! Not a bad stand in though when nothing else is around! On All Hallows Eve I'll probably do a solid dose of 4-HO-MiPT, a touch of 3-MeO-PCP, and hopefully some DPT. If that happens I can get stoned to the bone too, which I haven't except for some light use over the past couple of months. I'm excited fit that too as my tolerance will be low!

Let me know how that combo works for you, the DPT + 3meo. I've been holding my last DPT dose for when I get a dissociative, and I will be receiving 3meo soon! I agree about the lack of hole as the lamest part, but otherwise I love the balance of functionality and effects

 

[Help?!?!]

Well I've technically done that before... Not alone but like 100mgs of MXE, 1-3 mgs of 3-MeO-PCP, and around 100mgs of DPT IM'd. I find DPT/MET to be an extraordinary addition to pretty much any dissociative. I'd preach that combo from the moutaintops if I could...! Pretty much everyone who does DPT with MXE, ket, or really any NDMA antagonist seems to love it. It's god like in a lot of ways. Like a sort of ultimate extravagant endeavor!

 

[SKL]

I think I am finally clear of an internal investigatory situation which could've cost my job. Basically picture every cop movie you've seen where they're getting interviewed on tape by internal affairs, that's basically what I was dealing with. I freaked the hell out. Then, a lot of nothing, no word from the investigatory service of my agency, nothing at all, just the doldrums of make-work (having being reassigned pending my "clearance"), with breaks for getting drunk every night to try and forget my worries and trying to set up some contingencies to keep my mind at ease. So, something like a year after that the bureaucracy acts, but it works very slow, so it'd been almost 18 months since the situation arose when I got papers that said they were after my job. But I thank God for the fact that I have a strong union, and, maybe 18 months out, we're going to settle this thing with a way that involves something like a 30 day unpaid leave or a certain sum out of each check. Not a big deal, really, what can you do. I've got some cash and bank accounts ready for just such an exigency, so in terms of my physical needs, I'll be fine. And dealing with this sort of situation, arising out of the physical part of my job, for those of you who know what I do (hint: not LE but deals with them a lot), is an occupational hazard especially in a world that is as politically correct as it is these days. This is such an incredible weight off my shoulders, I didn't know what I was going to do if it had gone the other way -- my union rep and everyone else were there to assure me I wouldn't, and they were right -- but the possibilities were endless, or very, very dark, so I thank God for that. I think I am going to be alright. This thing has sunk me into a deeply problematic relationship with alcohol, the Scylla of drowning my own sorrows and ignoring things, ostrich-like, to the Charybdis of accepting what is going on, and taking some pretty dangerous and hard actions to preserve myself. But now, that what has gone is in fact in my favor, I can brief the deepest sigh of relief. I just thank God that some of the things that I had contemplated doing to take care of myself and my own should necessities eventuate never had to come about. Just wanted to dump that. I know a bunch of y'all are going through work related issues too, and my hopes and prayers are with you.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

Good to hear SKL, I'm happy you've made it through the brambles to the other side! Sometimes it can be incredibly tough to stick it out through all the trouble and sorrow... 18 months, jees.

Here's a piece of music for everyone, been stuck in my head often these past weeks:

 

[solistus]

To quote John Oliver: oh, you've been through the desert with a horse with no name? Did it ever occur to you that IT'S YOUR JOB TO NAME THE HORSE? That's on you!

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

My my, that stuff does make one more talkative, took a bit extra last night over a bottle of wine. I've been making a concerted effort to share the [comparatively] positive parts of me lately, and here I go gettin' all overly honest about the sad stuff. That's no darn good.

stuff

A year and half in limbo, jeez, that could drive anyone to drink. May the passing of this trial be the start of something brighter.

Also lately I've been wondering what 4-MeO-PCPr or y would be like!

PCPy is one of those drugs that I'll never have but really want to try, it's right up there with secobarbital (lol, can you imagine me with a supply of one of the better barbiturates? I'd prolly go the way of Jimi Hendrix, unintentionally of course.).


Which leads to something I ought to admit, I'm addicted to parenthetical comments (I know it's bad writing, but I can't stop), do they have a 12-step program for that?