perpetualdawn
Bluelighter
Haha, I remember that episode, didnt realise he wrote a book. Hamilton is the best at just absolutely deadpanning people about their really wacky ideas.![]()
So true

Haha, I remember that episode, didnt realise he wrote a book. Hamilton is the best at just absolutely deadpanning people about their really wacky ideas.![]()
Probably they wouldn't feel obligated to honor it, but surely if someone died carrying something like that it would made it to the news. Makes me lol in a morbid way. Dunno about it preventing the media from further pushing prohibitionist agenda, but a story like that would at least open the debate.
Dulls visuals generally (though alcohol doesn't for me, don't know why) but generally, the headspace remains but the 'fear' is greatly depressed. Opioids of course help stop the "I need to poop" feeling I usually get the whole trip. Generally, in order of most depressing (of effects), I'd say it's benzos (clonazepam completely dulls things, etiz and alpraz and diazepam are all less dulling) then opioids, then booze which ime doesn't dull things much but rather turns them fully hedonistic.How do benzos and opiates affect trips for you? I've found that even beer slightly kills the headspace for me, but I have a very low tolerance to gabaergics in general... I asume is similar with other downers, does it become a mainly visual/phyisical trip? Or do you still get some mindfuck too? Or does it just blends nicely and you get a little bit of everything?
I was having mushrooms that much for a while. As long as I did something different each time, there was very little if any tolerance or diminished returns. Acid on the other hand, I used once at the end of each month for maybe 6 months (same product) and I noticed considerable blunting of what was originally some of the nicest acid I'd had.Been tripping psilacetin every 2-3 days for weeks now (any time I have the next day off work, and I'm part time so it happens fairly often). Amazing how little tolerance I've developed.
I've had really good experiences with benzos and psychedelics. Sometimes drugs work in perfect synergy, the benzos remove any uncomfortable tension of the mind, body and soul, allowing the psychedelics to really shine.How do benzos and opiates affect trips for you?
Just randomly remembered that last night I dreamed I smoked a joint with @Xorkoth, lol !
We just smoked and chilled while sitting on the side way of a mountain road. Can't remember any details though.
On the subject of dreams... I had an absolutely mad one about 4 weeks ago now which I did write down on waking up just because it was so lucid and traumatic and full of symbolism about my life decisions... I won't share absolutely everything here because it would be in danger of becoming a novel but it started out innocently enough in a major city near me where I used to go to this MMA gym fairly regularly... one of my old trainers was there who I really liked, but for some reason the gym was on a higher level than usual, like we all had to climb up some dangerous looking scaffolding to get to it... some people I knew were talking to me saying come on let's go and initially I was like OK although I knew I didn't really want to, would suck, was out of shape and didn't feel like getting beat up for 90 minutes or so... so after initially pretending to follow I snuck off quietly with some other people... the group I ended up with was one of stereotypically obese "losers", totally out of shape, demotivated, no offence to anyone struggling with their weight of course, this was just the symbolism in the dream, so I was feeling like fuck, man, this is who I am now... an out of shape decrepit loser... there was some kind of festival going on and shortly after a fairly large gay African man started coming on to me (hoping this isn't indicative of some unconscious racial biases... but I'm just sharing my honest experience! My friend who I told this to suggested it was simply a representation of someone somewhat opposite to me, as a heterosexual normal sized white person)...I was in a hypermodern and sophisticated gladiator style prison/tournament, I remember waking up thinking 'wow that was amazing, I NEED to remember this', then all the details and intricacies left me and now only that vague description remains
Just randomly remembered that last night I dreamed I smoked a joint with @Xorkoth, lol !
We just smoked and chilled while sitting on the side way of a mountain road. Can't remember any details though.
I was in a hypermodern and sophisticated gladiator style prison/tournament, I remember waking up thinking 'wow that was amazing, I NEED to remember this', then all the details and intricacies left me and now only that vague description remains
Well after like a month of no dream recall at all, I had what was probably the most vivid/awesome night of dreaming I've ever had. I just postted this in PD social but I wanted to post it here too.
Wow I just had the most incredible dream, seemingly across the entire night, I woke up a bit a few times. It began as if I was watching a movie, the level of detail was incredible, it was continuous moment to moment, and I really believed I was sitting on my couch, watching a movie with my girlfriend. The movie was really complex and very, very good. It was a sort of dark psychological crime movie, the main characters were James Franco and Anne Hathaway, and some some other guy that seems familiar but can't place him. She played this super sexy girl who seduced him and was really nuts and basically was trying to frame him for murdering her, she convinced him to act out this whole stabbing her and then drowning her process in a flirtatious manner, but that he found disturbing yet sexy, I don't remember why, and then at some point he found out about it and went through this intense process of deciding he needed to actually kill her, and then he did kill her by seducing her back and recreating the fake murder for real. It was really gruesome and captivating but hard to watch as well, and there was a meta-narrative in my head about whether or not it's a good thing for us to be watching such violence on-screen as a society. My girlfriend got up and didn't keep watching after a while, the violence was really intense and gratuitous. Throughout the whole thing, the acting was amazing and the soundtrack was incredible, it was all darkly ambient original music. I swear if I could replay it all on command and write the script and soundtrack this movie would be a big hit, it was so good. It was disturbing and mesmerizing.
Also through it there was a sort of side plot that eventually turned into the next part of the dream with the other actor guy, he was a hapless innocent guy who for some reason got involved with some mobsters and taken out for a night on the town that became quite debaucherous, and had a lot of sex and drugs, thing is, I could feel whatever was happening to him in my body, which was pretty damn cool considering he had a very good night.
There was a sort of indistinct slow shift into entirely that narrative, I woke up fully at one point and considered writing stuff down as I was so amazed by how awesome the dream was, and how my mind was even capable of coming up with such a thing, the level of detail was so breathtaking. When I first woke up and was thinking I had been actually watching this movie before I went to bed and was like wait, I should get up and actually finish watching the movie, and then I realized it was actually my dream.Immediately upon closing my eyes, before I fell asleep, I was watching it again but it was like I had to re-find my place in it, and then I would slowly get drawn back in, at first being aware I was dreaming and then forgetting. Honestly it was exactly like my ibogaine experience, just like it, except less abstract/impactful feeling and more of just a constant internal visual/audio narrative.
Anyway the next part gradually faded in from the part I was describing last. It slowly became me that was in this guy's role, except I was not him, I was actually me. But I was part of the storyline of these mobsters. We were in a big city and there was a plot going on between them/us and a rival group. At this point it became like I was living a crime caper movie sort of like a Tarantino film in character, the other people were all irreverent, darkly funny in the midst of violence and cruelty, but overall the vibe was humorous and exciting. I don't remember all the details by any means, I remember there was this one city block that kept getting totally destroyed by bombs and gunfire and stuff, especially this one shop. It was funny because all of these different scenes that ended in epic battles all ended up being on the same city block and it was always totally reconstructed since the last time, even if the scene was later the same day, and the scenes always ended in pretty much the total destruction of the entire area. And all the bystanders who had been collateral damage were totally unaware, except the shop owner in the shop me and the main characters would generally hang out at and have a bunch of witty banter while waiting for the next thing, every time after the first he'd be like "oh no, not again!" whenever shit was about to go down. It was a sort of absurdism aspect to it that was really funny and kind of a meta-commentary on the gratuitousness sometimes present in action films.
Eventually I woke up again, and when I closed my eyes again, I was in the same city, on the same city block in fact. This time I was with my girlfriend and some guys who were my friends, not actual friends in real life. They were my fraternity brothers and we were on some yearly trip together. We were staying at a hotel and there was a lot of partying that was really fun. I don't remember a lot of details about that, except towards the end, the guys told me it was time to do what we came to do, which was to act out this play that we do as a yearly tradition on this trip, it's a play about two rival crime families waging war on each other. I suddenly remembered that last year we had done this and it had been so transporting that I had fully believed it. My girlfriend was upset because she said that last year I had basically lost the plot and been unable to keep fantasy and reality separate in my head for months afterwards, I kept thinking I was actually in this crime family and we were in the middle of a war, and it had been awful. But I had to do it for some reason. Then the dream started to exactly repeat, the earlier part where this crime drama was unfolding. It felt sort of like I had gotten stuck in an acid time loop or something, it started to be really unpleasant and scary.
But then I realized I was dreaming, and basically became lucid and decided to just change things. But I didn't try to make any particular thing happened, I just willed the place I was in to change and then let whatever creative flow I was on just happen. The next thing I found myself in was much nicer. I was in a tropical place, it seemed like a coastal South American place with surfers and just a really chill beach vibe. I had a mission to try to learn to play this instrument, not exactly sure what it was, it didn't resemble any instrument I've ever seen, it was like a log that you played with a bow, but there were no strings visible, somehow the log itself vibrated to make this amazing sound (that sounded a lot like a cello). Some locals told me I needed to find this one woman and learn from her, so I went out to do that. When I found her, it seemed we had a connection, she was a really sexy woman about my age, when I found her she was surfing, but not on a surfboard, it was some sort of totally bizarre looking thing. She had a really sultry voice. She said she'd teach me the instrument, and she was like so you probably play guitar, right? Are you any good? I was like no, I play keys, I like to think I'm pretty good, yeah. She was like oh wow, I don't meet too many keyboard players. When did you start? I told her I'd been playing pretty much my whole life, and I started when I was 8, but had started being involved in music (choir) ever since I could remember. She closed her eyes and smiled and then looked at me and told me that this was going to be amazing, she'd never taught someone who had always been in music like her. The look in her eyes was so alluring and exciting. It was certainly going to be a romance.
But before anything else happened (and I was equally excited to see where this was going with her as I was to learn this crazy instrument), I heard a knocking. We both looked around to see what it was, and then I remembered I was dreaming, and that the cable guy was coming over sometime today between 8am and 9pm (fucking cable company time estimates, heh), and I better get up to check whether it was them or not. So reluctantly I got up, and sure enough, it was them, at precisely 8am. That ended up taking an hour. I really wanted to go back to sleep because that dream seemed very likely to be an awesome one, but instead I decided to try to write it all down before I totally forgot it all. So that's what I've done, hope you enjoy, I sure did.
It was as vivid and intense as any night of dreaming I've ever had. I haven't actually remembered my dreams at all ever since I stopped doing iboga microdosing a couple of weeks ago, and even during the microdosing I didn't have many dreams, and the ones I did have were nowhere even remotely approaching this level of vividness. I actually don't think I have ever had any dream in my life that had as much detail as this one. Especially the movie in the first part, that was as vivid as watching a masterfully executed movie in real life, it would be so great if I could remember all of that, I might actually try my hand at writing a movie script and soundtrack. So crazy my subconscious mind could have come up with that.
I've been having pretty vivid dreams I have been coming off what I suspect is light GABAergic dependence which makes me sleep shallowly, and I've started taking melatonin, too. The other night (2 nights ago I think), I had some WILD dreams but I totally forgot to write them down so I don't remember any of them now. Last night I had a long, meandering dream, it involved, at first, me extracting some DMT, but it wasn't quite like in real life, I was just sticking MHRB right into naphtha. My friend was like "this is some insanely good bark", and the first jar I made immediately had giant crystal chunks that formed in the bottom (this isn't how it really works). Then it was the next day and the crystals had redissolved, and almost all of the naphtha had evaporated, because the jar lid was cracked. I was fretting about that, but my fully conscious mind kept interjecting that this isn't how it works, and that I forgot to put the lye in and that it was impossible for those crystals to have formed like that. I wanted to fix the issues, but then I went out to visit a head shop.
At the head shop, I was allowed to buy 2 of these "surprise packages" per day, they contained random things . I have never seen this particular head shop before, but the guy running it was this guy I made good friends with who ran a local head shop back when I was going in every day for kratom. I was in a composite city that had elements from my city, and others I've been to. It reminds me of a city I was in during some other vivid dreams in the recent past (maybe my last big entry in here). After I went to the head shop, I was going all around the city and I don't remember why but I was doing various things. I kept meeting up with a friend. I didn't have a car so I was using public transport and walking a lot. The days blended together, I kept going back and getting 2 more of these secret packages every day. I was, for some reason, only allowed to open one per day. I was getting stuff like phenibut and weed, but what I kept hoping for was a fat dose of poppy seeds to make poppy tea (which I never got).
Eventually, I found that I was in an outdoor classroom, in what was supposed to be one of my high school English teachers' classes (not an actual teacher I had but in the dream it was a distinct, complete memory of a high school teacher I had in the past). For some reason, I was in the class with a bunch of high schoolers, and I was in high school again. We were having a pop quiz, which for some reason was a series of 4 timed logic word problems (kind of like math but not really math). I don't remember them except the last one, but they were incredibly subjective and did not have actual solid answers. The first 3 I totally flubbed, and I was starting to get anxious about it, because I didn't want to get a bad grade. Then I got the 4th one and it got more vidid, and I remembered that I'm actually 37 years old and it's been 20+ years since I would have been in such a class. Then I stopped caring. But I remember the problem, it said "look up at those 2 trees there. Given that one of them is bent, but that one has more total trunk length than the straight one, please answer how tall the other one is".
Then suddenly I was in a car with some of the students and one of them's dad. I was again a high school student, and we were on the way back from a trip. There were a number of us, and we were on the way to the house of the girl whose dad it was. She and I were trying to find some time and place to fool around. We ended up making out a little but kept getting interrupted, we didn't want anyone to know for some reason (not just her dad but also the other kids - I wasn't thinking of us as kids at the time but now in retrospect yeah, we were like 15/16). Then at their house (which was this massive crazy mansion that looked like a normal house on the outside and also inside in the rooms, but was just like 50 rooms big on the inside), the dad (who was pretty intense) said it's time to play a game. We each had some object to hide, and there was this huge room full of basically what amounted to a carpet of fine hair, but the hair was giant, like 12 feet tall, so you'd jump down into it and have to crawl through it. We were supposed to hide our objects in there, and also try to find the object of the previous person. And then the next person was supposed to find our object. When it was my turn, I found the previous person's object, and noticed that a lot of the hair had been trampled down and was forming a really thick bed of matted hair, so I hid my object way underneath it and felt pretty confident my object wouldn't be able to be found.
Then I woke up.
Brains are weird.