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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Distancing Talk Thread: Swirly Congregation That's 100% Pandemic-Proof
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LSDMDMA&
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2010
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dogs place ya bets on whether or not I get arrested today hahahahaa
last night was terrible. i no call no showed wotrk cause idgaf i was gonna quit anyway, i gotta go get my check tho later once my boy is up so i can get a ride.
might go clothes shoppin and buy something interesting of the non drugs variety as well that would be a gamechanger.
last night was terrible. i no call no showed wotrk cause idgaf i was gonna quit anyway, i gotta go get my check tho later once my boy is up so i can get a ride.
might go clothes shoppin and buy something interesting of the non drugs variety as well that would be a gamechanger.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Why might you get arrested?
So glad to hear your friend is doing well Xorkoth.
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Bought 5 grams of 3-meo-pcp a couple months ago. The cycle ran as usual. I began with a few properly timid tests before discarding the entire harm reduction manual in search of a better high. I think it may have been the PCC-contaminated batch so potency was low, about 30% of what I would expect from previous batches. My doses were so high it would be irresponsible to post them. Anyway, at the end I ran about a 10 day binge culminating in the remaining 3.5 grams going in the toilet. I also threw around 200 shitty "Ecstasy" pills in a coffee grinder and flushed those too. The lab report said those were mainly N-Ethylpentylone.
Around day 7 or 8 of my binge I took a bunch of 3-meo-pcp after work, then as I was still very high yet trying to sleep for my next shift I had a crazy dream. The contents of the dream are mostly gone but I distinctly remember as I woke out of it I verbally addressed the spirit of 3-meo-pcp, telling it to quit trying to rewrite my memories. I felt it was trying to insert some insidious shit in my head. I do remember that I felt a similarity in these intrusive ideas to the novel "Baal" by Robert R McCammon. Even after this incident, and a one day break due to actual responsibilities, I decided to go for another round on the crazy train, which is when I decided to dump the drugs that were the most harmful to my mental well-being.
The last time I dumped my 3-meo-pcp I was very distraught afterwards. I feel 100% confident in my decision this time.
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Bought 5 grams of 3-meo-pcp a couple months ago. The cycle ran as usual. I began with a few properly timid tests before discarding the entire harm reduction manual in search of a better high. I think it may have been the PCC-contaminated batch so potency was low, about 30% of what I would expect from previous batches. My doses were so high it would be irresponsible to post them. Anyway, at the end I ran about a 10 day binge culminating in the remaining 3.5 grams going in the toilet. I also threw around 200 shitty "Ecstasy" pills in a coffee grinder and flushed those too. The lab report said those were mainly N-Ethylpentylone.
Around day 7 or 8 of my binge I took a bunch of 3-meo-pcp after work, then as I was still very high yet trying to sleep for my next shift I had a crazy dream. The contents of the dream are mostly gone but I distinctly remember as I woke out of it I verbally addressed the spirit of 3-meo-pcp, telling it to quit trying to rewrite my memories. I felt it was trying to insert some insidious shit in my head. I do remember that I felt a similarity in these intrusive ideas to the novel "Baal" by Robert R McCammon. Even after this incident, and a one day break due to actual responsibilities, I decided to go for another round on the crazy train, which is when I decided to dump the drugs that were the most harmful to my mental well-being.
The last time I dumped my 3-meo-pcp I was very distraught afterwards. I feel 100% confident in my decision this time.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Nice, I'm glad you nipped it in the bud. All you can do is keep learning and growing. The first 2 times I got 3-MeO, I would use it most days, for months on end, but only in 2mg bumps a few times a day, I never liked it at high doses. But I had about a year straight where I was doing it almost every day. I ran out and didn't get more for a long while and I have some now, but rarely feel like I want to use it. It never grabbed me too hard but I did get extremely manic sometimes. Never got delusional though. I attribute that to low dosing, however. I have high dosed before but I didn't find it pleasant any of the times except once, so I stopped trying.
3-meo-pcp is a black hole of a drug. It draws me in inexorably. The heavier and denser it gets the more it warps time and space around it. There is an event horizon which prevents any information from escaping its grasp and being known in consensus reality.
perpetualdawn
Bluelighter
Heh I noticed similar kinds of cognitive black holes on a big dose of ETH-LAD ^ I'm guessing its a different kind of black hole, but with the same trait of being so far from consensus reality that memory isn't equipped to hold the experience, or express it in this normal plane of existence.
LSDMDMA&
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2010
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- 12,827
Doges.
Quit my job. Left at the first smoke break. Cause same shit going on. I'm not gonna just ignore it when dome pussy got my name in his mouth thinking shit is sweet.
Fr like it was either I bounce or run the fuck down on dude, then bounce. Pussy right before smoke break was trying to stare me down and I was just barely able to not yell asking him if he wants it Ill give it to him so either mind your own shit or be a man and handle this real quick
I passed out for a few hours in the afternoon and woke up at like 6? Didn't do any more shit since I woke up. I'm waiting on my Mom to go to sleep ans then prob long as I got a spike stick platinum break 2 in this big subwoofer Lg joint in the living room and do a fuckin huge joint.
Quit my job. Left at the first smoke break. Cause same shit going on. I'm not gonna just ignore it when dome pussy got my name in his mouth thinking shit is sweet.
Fr like it was either I bounce or run the fuck down on dude, then bounce. Pussy right before smoke break was trying to stare me down and I was just barely able to not yell asking him if he wants it Ill give it to him so either mind your own shit or be a man and handle this real quick
I passed out for a few hours in the afternoon and woke up at like 6? Didn't do any more shit since I woke up. I'm waiting on my Mom to go to sleep ans then prob long as I got a spike stick platinum break 2 in this big subwoofer Lg joint in the living room and do a fuckin huge joint.
LSDMDMA&
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2010
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Doges I feel great but I've been mostly ignoring noises all night so obviously should things go quiet from me I'm booked.
At least tonight has been perfect as far as getting high wise. Gpod shit starts to feel like MDA when you keep doing more and more while you already fucked up ans that's where I'm at.
I got bad company on and im dancing a little. This is what I like about speed again and not like bullshit being paranoid. I give no fucks
At least tonight has been perfect as far as getting high wise. Gpod shit starts to feel like MDA when you keep doing more and more while you already fucked up ans that's where I'm at.
I got bad company on and im dancing a little. This is what I like about speed again and not like bullshit being paranoid. I give no fucks
swilow
Bluelight Crew
What do you mean "ignoring noises"?
Delsyd
Bluelight Crew
The noises his probation officer makes when he?s hiding in his walls.
LSDMDMA&
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2010
- Messages
- 12,827
Haha nah. Noises as in footsteps outside type shit
All good still. I mean my mom has to have like figured it out but I wouldn't bother even denying it I'd ve like yea I did a few lines
I can't think of what to do today. I need a new hat cause I lost one a few weeks back so I may go get ready and then go buy clothes. I haven't spent any of my paycheck this week on drugs and that's pretty good
I dropped I think like 100 on shit from the metalheadz store tho and I'm like hesitant to wanna look at clothes cause of that.
All good still. I mean my mom has to have like figured it out but I wouldn't bother even denying it I'd ve like yea I did a few lines
I can't think of what to do today. I need a new hat cause I lost one a few weeks back so I may go get ready and then go buy clothes. I haven't spent any of my paycheck this week on drugs and that's pretty good
I dropped I think like 100 on shit from the metalheadz store tho and I'm like hesitant to wanna look at clothes cause of that.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
I'm gonna be honest... if you're quitting your job because someone is staring at you, and losing sleep over trying to ignore footsteps outside, and thinking you're going to prison because of it, and you're NOT doing drugs... that's not good. It's not good if you ARE doing drugs, either. Take care of yourself, man.
LSDMDMA&
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2010
- Messages
- 12,827
Bro you're totally misinterpreting the situation haha
I maybe didn't explain it well
nah see basically i did all last week no speed and I liiterally fell asleep standing up (for a few seconds anyway) like 2 or 3 diff days in the afternoon
so plan was do a little speed at said job in order to be able to function
that didn't work because its hot as fuck there which doesn't agree with me+speed and like i still absolutely hated work whether I was high not high or just awake
but I liked the money so i wanted to persevere, but i'd guess it started to become noticable that I was on something and i gave no fucks for a day or two cause i'm like let them say something cause worst case I bounce
well it became intolerable to me to just ignore people talking shit basically, the main thing is I get twitchy and that was what was noticed from what I gather.
But so I had planned on quitting but the chick who ran the shit liked me and so I skipped work thursday, didnt call and just went to get my check in the afternoon and explain that I'm cool cause its legit hard and shit to begin with and I'm not gonna work somewhere people like think they're above me or something right
well we talked for like a half hour and i wasl ike yea i'll be in tomorrow. go in the next day. same shit going on, dirty looks etc. and i was like fuck it idc. Well when the bullshit started a few days ago it was like 2 people who were like instigating it basically, that and blabbing that I've been locked up before and shit which i dont hide anyway...
So anyway friday morning same shit diff day, I talked with a few of the people I legit liked and was like yeah bro I know shit is being said and all that and this is legitimately too much for me (56 hours a week) so I'm prob gonna be out but I'll stay the rest of the day right
Well the morning goes on and after having like "caught" one of the main 2 talking shit about being twitchy again all of 5 feet directly in front of me, facing me, staring at me while doing it.
Later that morning I'm doing my shit and literally look up from the machine and dude is staring at me like he wants smoke and shit
I said something to my coworker like yo fuck this pussy he wants it he can get it.. and i had went from just hating having to work to all amped up and angry
Well I couldn't run down on dude at work, they do call the cops if you get in a fight there so I had gone out on break and sat with one of my boys and decided that I was just gonna bounce then and there fuck giving them the courtesy of finishing, because to me it upsets me more that like this fuck thought that he could fuck with me.
Idk bro like i'm not about to just let people slide on some shit when they're instigating the shit/disrespectin me in front of people like that esp when its some bro fuck from bumfuck nowhere you know
Yea you think i'd be hearing noises and shit if i WASNT gettin high? fuck no. speed makes your hearing more sensitive, i cant explain it but like you'll hear every bump in the night but you can tell like whats a "real" noise and what is nothing. RX speed will do it too and not like in loony dosages either. You act like I'm mid psychosis haha i slept this morning from like 10am-130pm passed the fuck out. I've held it together although admittedly last night all my neighbors saw me come out on the porch absolutely wrecked. cause I like to sit out back or on the porch, listen to music and smoke cigarettes when I tweak which is what I did last night. except when i came out last night like all my neighbors were already out chillin and shit. Like fr its not as if I never see the ops when i walk to get drinks/cigs and you know i dont get stopped walking.
shit it was hilarious the other day I had gone to get an arizona. walking back home dudes holdin down this corner hustlin right and i told em i was broke and turned right and it was a cop sittin there window down bout to turn. Well i had not yelled but loudly said 5-0 to said dudes and i honestly thought i was goin down for doing that. He gave me the nastiest look and it was hilarious but not gonna lie i was a lil shook.
dog you gotta understand that on speed mad shit goes down but none of it matters. I'm not gonna lie and say I dont read into everything cause I do but I generally am able to be ok
I'm sittin out back and i'm bout to line more up out here on the laptop like i did earlier.
Its nice bro I'm gettin a lil tolerance again so I can like function better out in public fucked up.
I gotta go inside to get the other disc for platinum breakz 2.
omg tho a goddamn yellowjacket was walking on my knee. i killed it but legit that shit almost made me jump outta my chair.
I maybe didn't explain it well
nah see basically i did all last week no speed and I liiterally fell asleep standing up (for a few seconds anyway) like 2 or 3 diff days in the afternoon
so plan was do a little speed at said job in order to be able to function
that didn't work because its hot as fuck there which doesn't agree with me+speed and like i still absolutely hated work whether I was high not high or just awake
but I liked the money so i wanted to persevere, but i'd guess it started to become noticable that I was on something and i gave no fucks for a day or two cause i'm like let them say something cause worst case I bounce
well it became intolerable to me to just ignore people talking shit basically, the main thing is I get twitchy and that was what was noticed from what I gather.
But so I had planned on quitting but the chick who ran the shit liked me and so I skipped work thursday, didnt call and just went to get my check in the afternoon and explain that I'm cool cause its legit hard and shit to begin with and I'm not gonna work somewhere people like think they're above me or something right
well we talked for like a half hour and i wasl ike yea i'll be in tomorrow. go in the next day. same shit going on, dirty looks etc. and i was like fuck it idc. Well when the bullshit started a few days ago it was like 2 people who were like instigating it basically, that and blabbing that I've been locked up before and shit which i dont hide anyway...
So anyway friday morning same shit diff day, I talked with a few of the people I legit liked and was like yeah bro I know shit is being said and all that and this is legitimately too much for me (56 hours a week) so I'm prob gonna be out but I'll stay the rest of the day right
Well the morning goes on and after having like "caught" one of the main 2 talking shit about being twitchy again all of 5 feet directly in front of me, facing me, staring at me while doing it.
Later that morning I'm doing my shit and literally look up from the machine and dude is staring at me like he wants smoke and shit
I said something to my coworker like yo fuck this pussy he wants it he can get it.. and i had went from just hating having to work to all amped up and angry
Well I couldn't run down on dude at work, they do call the cops if you get in a fight there so I had gone out on break and sat with one of my boys and decided that I was just gonna bounce then and there fuck giving them the courtesy of finishing, because to me it upsets me more that like this fuck thought that he could fuck with me.
Idk bro like i'm not about to just let people slide on some shit when they're instigating the shit/disrespectin me in front of people like that esp when its some bro fuck from bumfuck nowhere you know
Yea you think i'd be hearing noises and shit if i WASNT gettin high? fuck no. speed makes your hearing more sensitive, i cant explain it but like you'll hear every bump in the night but you can tell like whats a "real" noise and what is nothing. RX speed will do it too and not like in loony dosages either. You act like I'm mid psychosis haha i slept this morning from like 10am-130pm passed the fuck out. I've held it together although admittedly last night all my neighbors saw me come out on the porch absolutely wrecked. cause I like to sit out back or on the porch, listen to music and smoke cigarettes when I tweak which is what I did last night. except when i came out last night like all my neighbors were already out chillin and shit. Like fr its not as if I never see the ops when i walk to get drinks/cigs and you know i dont get stopped walking.
shit it was hilarious the other day I had gone to get an arizona. walking back home dudes holdin down this corner hustlin right and i told em i was broke and turned right and it was a cop sittin there window down bout to turn. Well i had not yelled but loudly said 5-0 to said dudes and i honestly thought i was goin down for doing that. He gave me the nastiest look and it was hilarious but not gonna lie i was a lil shook.
dog you gotta understand that on speed mad shit goes down but none of it matters. I'm not gonna lie and say I dont read into everything cause I do but I generally am able to be ok
I'm sittin out back and i'm bout to line more up out here on the laptop like i did earlier.
Its nice bro I'm gettin a lil tolerance again so I can like function better out in public fucked up.
I gotta go inside to get the other disc for platinum breakz 2.
omg tho a goddamn yellowjacket was walking on my knee. i killed it but legit that shit almost made me jump outta my chair.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Well my ex and her mom came today. What a clusterfuck. 
It was really awkward as I expected. Two of my best friends came and spent the whole day with me to keep me company and have witnesses there. I had moved all the boxes of stuff THAT MY EX PACKED HERSELF 5 years ago, downstairs into my living room. My house looked like a hoarder's dream but it's just because of that, she has a shit ton of crap here. They got here at 1 and started slowly going through everything... claimed they needed to unpack everything and categorize it and repack. They rented a storage space in town so they could put the stuff that wouldn't fit in the van (they didn't rent a U-Haul because I refused to pay for one so I guess they just figured they'd drive half the stuff 700 miles back and then come back to the storage locker and get the rest sometime ![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
). Around 4:30, my friends and I helped them load up a bunch of heavy furniture to put in the storage space. I figured hey, cool, we're making progress. But NOPE, they got back and spent the next 5 and a half hours unpacking everything and painstakingly categorizing it and wrapping every little thing in bubble wrap and repacking it. They just left... my house looks like a hoarder's stash exploded in it. It's WAY worse than when they started, there is shit everywhere and they moved all my shit around too. Nothing else has left the house yet and only half the fucking boxes are even unpacked! They're saying it might take more than one more day! If so I'll have to skip my alcohol treatment course tomorrow which sucks because I only get 2 skips before I get penalized and I have 14 more of them to do. It's like, dude, why do you need to sort this shit? Just load it all up and take it away! Sort it when you get home! So fucking annoying I could scream! And they're making little digs at me about my house being in bad shape... because it's musty and kinda moldy upstairs, but bitch, it wouldn't be if you'd just fucking approve the mortgage refinance and let me stop my leaky roof! When water gets in through the ceiling, it gets moldy! Plus it only looks like this because your shit exploded all over, normally it's clean and organized.
The only positive thing that is coming from this so far is that the last time I saw her the wounds were fresh and I was terrified of her... I was really scared to see her which was causing me a lot of stress, but now that I've seen her again, I'm not scared at all, just (really) annoyed. So I think ultimately it's therapeutic, I have a lot less anxiety, now it's more frustration. Plus, if she signs the papers before heading out of town like she said she would, it'll all be worth it... but damn it, if they don't finish tomorrow I won't be able to see my girl til Wednesday because she doesn't want to be here and it would be a bad idea for her to be here, would just make things worse, and she works Tuesday. I miss my baby!
I want to just give them an ultimatum to be done tomorrow, but it's complicated because she technically still owns the house, too, so I can't kick her out. And boy is she acting like it... I'm sure this is why she refused the sign the papers ahead of time, so I couldn't kick her out. No idea why they're being so inefficient though, I could have packed my whole house up in the time they've spent so far, and they're only like half done.
It was really awkward as I expected. Two of my best friends came and spent the whole day with me to keep me company and have witnesses there. I had moved all the boxes of stuff THAT MY EX PACKED HERSELF 5 years ago, downstairs into my living room. My house looked like a hoarder's dream but it's just because of that, she has a shit ton of crap here. They got here at 1 and started slowly going through everything... claimed they needed to unpack everything and categorize it and repack. They rented a storage space in town so they could put the stuff that wouldn't fit in the van (they didn't rent a U-Haul because I refused to pay for one so I guess they just figured they'd drive half the stuff 700 miles back and then come back to the storage locker and get the rest sometime ). Around 4:30, my friends and I helped them load up a bunch of heavy furniture to put in the storage space. I figured hey, cool, we're making progress. But NOPE, they got back and spent the next 5 and a half hours unpacking everything and painstakingly categorizing it and wrapping every little thing in bubble wrap and repacking it. They just left... my house looks like a hoarder's stash exploded in it. It's WAY worse than when they started, there is shit everywhere and they moved all my shit around too. Nothing else has left the house yet and only half the fucking boxes are even unpacked! They're saying it might take more than one more day! If so I'll have to skip my alcohol treatment course tomorrow which sucks because I only get 2 skips before I get penalized and I have 14 more of them to do. It's like, dude, why do you need to sort this shit? Just load it all up and take it away! Sort it when you get home! So fucking annoying I could scream! And they're making little digs at me about my house being in bad shape... because it's musty and kinda moldy upstairs, but bitch, it wouldn't be if you'd just fucking approve the mortgage refinance and let me stop my leaky roof! When water gets in through the ceiling, it gets moldy! Plus it only looks like this because your shit exploded all over, normally it's clean and organized. The only positive thing that is coming from this so far is that the last time I saw her the wounds were fresh and I was terrified of her... I was really scared to see her which was causing me a lot of stress, but now that I've seen her again, I'm not scared at all, just (really) annoyed. So I think ultimately it's therapeutic, I have a lot less anxiety, now it's more frustration. Plus, if she signs the papers before heading out of town like she said she would, it'll all be worth it... but damn it, if they don't finish tomorrow I won't be able to see my girl til Wednesday because she doesn't want to be here and it would be a bad idea for her to be here, would just make things worse, and she works Tuesday. I miss my baby!
I want to just give them an ultimatum to be done tomorrow, but it's complicated because she technically still owns the house, too, so I can't kick her out. And boy is she acting like it...
I'm sure this is why she refused the sign the papers ahead of time, so I couldn't kick her out. No idea why they're being so inefficient though, I could have packed my whole house up in the time they've spent so far, and they're only like half done.
SharedHalucination
Bluelighter
Psyched for the Blink 182 concert next month! Gonna candy flip!
cosmic charlie
Bluelight Crew
Well i just took my last dose of tramadol this morning after being on it for over 2 years. Been binging on it heavily all summer long and its time for a serious tolerance break. Have this Kratom extract that is powerful and assisted the taper.
After tommorow i'm only gonna take it when i have to go out with my girlfriend next weekend and see her parents so i dont seem sickly. Thankfully i have plenty of hash oil and weed so that has been given me a healthy appetite. Wish me luck everybody, hope you all have a great day.
After tommorow i'm only gonna take it when i have to go out with my girlfriend next weekend and see her parents so i dont seem sickly. Thankfully i have plenty of hash oil and weed so that has been given me a healthy appetite. Wish me luck everybody, hope you all have a great day.
Xorkoth
Bluelight Crew
Good luck! I know how tough opiates are to kick, but you can do it. 
cosmic charlie
Bluelight Crew
Good luck! I know how tough opiates are to kick, but you can do it.
Thanks man i appreciate. Just gonna spend the week with the cats hanging out on the couch playing this video game i love. I'd really like to use Ibogaine at some point like you did. It would be wonderful to gain better control over my opiod addiction permanently.
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