tl;dr omg I can't believe I just wrote all this... I'm never smoking pot and coming into SLR again.
I'm a gay man and I love topping, so I'll gladly stick my dick in an ass if he's my lover/partner, but put my mouth on it? Nope nope nope. I've been rimmed a few times and it was pleasurable but not in a way that really computes with sex. Kind of like getting a nice oil massage on your back, or a foot rub. It's great, but it doesn't translate to omg I'm about to have an orgasm, or omg my hole is ready to get fucked! I've rimmed two guys in my whole life, once each. One was right after he showered when I told him I wanted to rim him so he better be super clean down there. The other one was while we were in the shower. It honestly did nothing for me and I was mildly grossed out the whole time.
And there's guys in the gay community who will rim an ass no matter what state it's in. I just... can't deal with that. No shaming intended, but wtf? My good friend is a sexual health nurse in gay ville and he treats men every week who have parasite infections from rimming. In my city, e. histolytica, an amoebic infection, is the 5th most common STI for this reason! But what can be said about it? Some guys like eating out pussy, some like eating out ass. Is it fair to expect them to ever stop?
And then there's bottoms you won't even let you fuck them unless you rim them for 20 mins first. Like... it's mandatory to "get it nice and worked up." I might use a finger or two to do some ass play, but honestly it just grosses me out. My other friends who are tops say I'm a lousy top, but I can't help it. I am just so turned off by even the slightest shit residue. If I pull my finger out and there is shit smell or heaven forbid a SPEC of shit they neglected to douche, then bye bye boner and sex entirely! I wish I was straight ONLY because pussy seems so much cleaner in that way... but I guess that's irrelevant since so many straight people do anal anyway.
On the gay dating apps, where it lists that I'm a top, I get so many random photos of close ups on assholes from random bottoms that I literally wrote in my profile: STOP SENDING ME CLOSE UPS OF YOUR ASSHOLE I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT. Porn has programmed all the gays to think that rimming is thise into getting fucked. Sometimes I have what I call "anthropology moments" when I become out of body and just objectively consider the human experience - this body, what we look like, what interests us, what we do with all this - and the whole thing is ridiculous. Like, it's absurd really. I kind of can't believe that when I get turned on I really want to stick my dick in the hole that someone shits out of... but that's life with a dick for you. "You want me to stick what in where?!" So... I grant some grace to all the men out there who love rimming said shit holes because, although I'm not into it whatsoever, I'm into my own things, and those things appear bizarre or gross to others, who in turn have their own things that make zero sense to me.
I mean, there's porn out there that is just 30 minutes of one guy rimming another guy. What's worse than rimming? Oh, I know, watching rimming porn! I don't get it? When I find a whole guy hot, the idea of being inside of him in the context of fucking his whole beautiful, hot body, makes sense to me, and therefore his ass makes sense to me from a dick penetration perspective. But an anus just floating in space, with no body? What is there to like?? I also don't like rimming because you can't fucking see anything. Your vision is blocked by ass! I mean, wtf is the point???? It's not logical I guess. Why is anyone attracted to what they're attracted to?
Anyway... I think I went into way too much detail here lol but it would be a shame to delete it all now. Enjoy motherfuckers!
I'm good
It was a while ago. All in the past.
✌
and my sex life is immensely fulfilling without any of this stuff.
