So I went to this wedding a month or two and got wildly fucked with a few of my childhood friends on brandy and beer. Hell, I don't even know who was getting married. Whoever it was, I shagged their wedding singer over the carpark wall at 5am before heading back to my Dad's house for some sleep and I flew back to the UK the next day.
I had forgotton all about this and tonight while im baked I get this call and some chick with a really hot voice is talking smut down the phone to me! I only figure out who it is after five minutes

She's telling me that im the most amazing person she's ever . . .blah, blah, blah - so she's either into roleplaying or she's fucking nuts because she only had my company for one hour three months ago. . . .
I was stoned, and the upshot is that I invited her to come see me. And I
cannot even approximately visualise her face at all.
Have a funny feeling she may be twice my weight, cause I remember trying to sweep her off her feet and over a wall and accidentally cannonballing us both onto the grass
Im not sure this belongs here. I guess since alcohol and pot are involved it kind of fits, but at the same time I probably should not write it
anywhere