Alright yea that sounds good I’m definitely going going split it up and take half every 12 hours that way if I’m having a bad day or anything I’ll have something to look forward to like you said. I won’t get high but I’ll feel a little better still in slight withdrawal but I’ll feel better than I do right before I take it I’m sure. And yea sometimes when I’m not high I’ll get sad or overwhelmed or super emotional or something and the first thing I go for is to get high so I think I’m going to maybe like plan my day out when I wake up you know like think of some things to do that I likely won’t get stressed out doing and just try to avoid situations that might get me worked up in some way. Your right tho I have a lot of motivation in front of me to my life will be so much better if I can just kick this addiction be clean and sober get a nice job and build a good life for me and my little family that’s all I want. I just need to stay strong and make it through this and keep reminding myself that eventually all the withdrawals will be over and me and my little family with have a nice life together. I wish the person giving me the methadone was super strict about keeping me in line and helping me get off, he’s always saying thing like are you sure you don’t want more? You can get a buzz I won’t tell anybody and do you want me to leave it out for you incase you want more. No matter how many times I tell him I’m trying to get clean so that makes it even harder on me constantly having him say things like that I have to be super strong in those moments and when I leave after getting my dose I’m always upset at him like why would he say those things to me when he know what I’m doing. Thank you guys so much though
@Pumpkin2021 @JessFR seriously I can’t thank you guys enough for taking your time to help me and give me advice and encouragement. It really means a lot. Thank you to everybody here you guys are good people

. I’ll be back with more questions and updates I won’t leave you hanging and I will beat this addiction.