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Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

Alisha Jean Miller said:
Ahh thats never fun. Feel better soon!
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Thank you. I do already. I'm experienced, it's the 2nd time since January this year, true 6 week lymphatic influenza, now the 5th time since 2014, it's my trade though lol.

Lyme destroyed immunity 16 years ago plus nervous system dysregulation, very severe nerve damaging case of Long Covid 13 months now, then 2nd flu on top.

Life was on top. Flu sorts you out. It kicks you down at first. You only "catch" it because you are weak, so it takes you off guatd.

I made the first progress today at massively improving the state via alternative trewtkents, dietary, herbal etc.

It would not have been such a sweep but I took over 52 tabs of LSD in 6 days just before the flu came unexpectedly.

I was already braced for an intense week physical energy and mood crash then as always dandy the week after.

I'll definitely get through it though

In 5.5 weeks this flu WILL be gone.

Borrelia is gone. Covid rages on. Aggresive thing. It has as strong a foothold in the body as Borrelia does, or more maybe.

But it isn't a virus though or bilological as such.
 
Off of work today and tomorrow and I have no idea what to do. Mentally still a mess I keep praying I don’t wake up for what it’s worth but I can’t be sure if anyone is listening besides myself. When your whole world falls apart why would any caring supreme being leave you behind to exist without it. Sorry if I sound like I’m whining I just have no real outlet for these feelings and it’s better out than in I suppose. I hope no one else feels like I feel I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. May god have mercy on my soul I suppose if he decides to answer my prayers.
 
Freudzilla said:
Off of work today and tomorrow and I have no idea what to do. Mentally still a mess I keep praying I don’t wake up for what it’s worth but I can’t be sure if anyone is listening besides myself. When your whole world falls apart why would any caring supreme being leave you behind to exist without it. Sorry if I sound like I’m whining I just have no real outlet for these feelings and it’s better out than in I suppose. I hope no one else feels like I feel I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. May god have mercy on my soul I suppose if he decides to answer my prayers.
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How did you go today at work? I definitely know that feeling of hoping that you just don't wake up, and I also wouldn't wish it on anyone. I really hope you feel better soon. Keep us updated with how you're doing. This forum is a good outlet <3
 
Hi everybody here. I am really sorry for being such a ranting miserable moody asshole here of late.

Bob Marley's song Mellow Mood I think.

He says- I'm gonna put it on. In the morning. In the evening.

We all hurt, we all struggle.

That doesn't give me though the right to actually moan.

That is Bob's message there. It will hurt, it will be hard.

But AutoTripper don't moan, put it on instead!

Reaching out with love to everyone out ther from a drizzly UK midday atm actually I just looked haha,

I was unsure whether to say morning or afternoon.

So "Midday" is neither. It's a timeless concept. It doesn't need a millisecond to compute or exist.

Because it doesn't really exist. Only in concept. It's literally timeless tough, is Midday!

Sorry, I'm a philosopher. The illusion and presentation and conscious sensation of time is one of my key interests and study.
 
Nobody said it would be easy, is the simple heart and priciple of that message there too.

By strengthening perspective, finding resolve, learning to accept, we can move on.

That is the formula.
 
iTry91 said:
Don't be sorry same here lol 😆
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Hi there.But sorry can be a truly beautiful and inspiring thing when you realise it because it can help you realise why are you are sorry and in there lies the lesson you needed obviously or else you would not have made the mistake the first time round.

Just in general not relating to this I don't mean. Because it's that feeling that inspires you to try and do better and really put it on as Bob Marley wisely sang night and day.

I'm currently just redosing LSD still with Fijian Kava now for nerves. Supremely supremely hallucinigenic high and it isn't necessarily over yet either (as in more but 1000 mics will run long enough anyway.
 
Trying to prepare for the next chapter of my life. Not sure where it will take me but alone I will be at least for a while.
There really is some bad shit going on around this move we made and I must get away from it. Not turning my back by any means but have to "move on" as they say or I see it turning dark. It is gonna get dark anyway but maybe if I am removed I may be able to get a better perspective and foment valid options.
Not feeling the best about what is fixin to happen but happen it must. Not sure if I ever wanted to go through the pita of growth but this will be a bit different.
Need a couple more weeks to let leg heal and see what song the highway will sing to me this time:

prolly pick up a bike along the way....
 
schizopath said:
Atleast if I die while 27, I shall be born as a bassist in next life! Wait...
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Why not become a bassist in THIS lifetime?? :) Do iiiiit!!!
2j8BABi.jpg
 
Im alive at least. Im a total mess though. I have a irl friend now, dont know if ive told you. Havent had a female friend in like 10 years.
I have two keys to the apartment missing. Thinking that sociopath took them while he was here to trade bensos for metadone.
Ive been taking amphetamine iv in short periods again since like 2 months. It really fucks me up, the not eating or sleeping. And i get possibly even stupider bc of it.

Social anxiety is through the roof and I have to take either lyrica and bensos, tramadol and bensos or a shitload of benso. I only ever go out to shop for food, cigarettes or drugs. Or to meet my friend occasionally. She has lots of school so we cant se each other that often anymore. We were out shopping, ate sushi and went to a halloweenrave a while ago it was quite fun but cold. Feeling more normal when im with her, she feels more grown up then me even though she is 3 years younger.

Missed you blue friends 💙
(tack för hälsningen i videon @DeadManWalkin' det gjorde min morgon bättre )
 
^Really sorry to hear that. Sounds uber painful. Life can sometimes be a job that we never signed up for. Things do not seem that they can improve some times, but I am happily surprised when they do. It can happen in a split second. There is a lot of hope, in my experience.

We are otherwise watching out for you to the best of our means!

I'm honestly not doing that great, but I feel not bad. Strange. Hmmmmmm.
 
QTpi said:
Hi all,

This thread should be a safe haven for those with MI, where we can chat with each other and talk about how we are feeling for the day.

I have Bipolar Disorder, and today i feel pretty stable. I've been sober for a week now because i have a probation piss test coming up, but will soon do some meth. The thing is, i stay up all night when on it, so it could quite possibly make me hypomanic.

But what's wrong with a little hypomania when your on Lithium, Lamictal and Vraylar? Can't be that bad of a crash. I mean, i've done meth before on these meds and i was fine.. I obviously don't recommend it but self medication is such a big part of my life, unfortunately.

Anyway, hopefully i can get to know some of you and we can talk about problems, successes, and just anything that's on your mind.

:D
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At the moment feel content and graceful
 
on.my.way🌿 said:
Im alive at least. Im a total mess though. I have a irl friend now, dont know if ive told you. Havent had a female friend in like 10 years.
I have two keys to the apartment missing. Thinking that sociopath took them while he was here to trade bensos for metadone.
Ive been taking amphetamine iv in short periods again since like 2 months. It really fucks me up, the not eating or sleeping. And i get possibly even stupider bc of it.
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Its been a long time. I was kinda in a similar position. Guess I thought I deserve to feel bad and shit like that. But I got over it. And you can too.

Im rooting for you 🧡

If you ask me.... I 100% rather hang out with schizophrenics and other rejects than sociopathic (rats) people.
 
I feel a bit more off than usual today. Am struggling a lot with social anxiety. Living in a sober house belonging to the rehab centre I spent 9 months in for addiction. I honestly don't know how to force myself to be around people (sober). everytime I am around people i get negative re-inforcement that 'yes it was as horrible as I expected and worse, I never even factored in this even more horrible part to this social interaction prior to it'..

Without a substance I just cannot do it. I am desperately trying to find a doctor that will prescribe me benzodiazepines, however they are rarely ever prescribed long term here and if they find out about previous addiction issues forget it. They are the only thing that allows me get past that barrier to being around people.

I found a box of tramadol xr that are 12 years past their expiry date. These are providing me some much needed relief from the constant ball of stress, worry and anxiety that seems to come with a life in sobriety (for me anyway).. I really dont want to become dependant on them as I was never a big opiate fan so having a day off them today. Fully sober is just how I remember it, fucking painfully tough going!!
 
QTpi said:
Hi all,

This thread should be a safe haven for those with MI, where we can chat with each other and talk about how we are feeling for the day.

I have Bipolar Disorder, and today i feel pretty stable. I've been sober for a week now because i have a probation piss test coming up, but will soon do some meth. The thing is, i stay up all night when on it, so it could quite possibly make me hypomanic.

But what's wrong with a little hypomania when your on Lithium, Lamictal and Vraylar? Can't be that bad of a crash. I mean, i've done meth before on these meds and i was fine.. I obviously don't recommend it but self medication is such a big part of my life, unfortunately.

Anyway, hopefully i can get to know some of you and we can talk about problems, successes, and just anything that's on your mind.

:D
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you're just like me but bro , remember bipolar disorder is a neurodegenerative disease that kills brain cells and reduce the level of antioxidants we have in our systems, every bipolar high is neurotoxic
 
Nas47 said:
Feel sad,anxious and frighten somehow.An extra 5mg valium+100 vodka.Many,many people dying around.Covid.First per mortality in the world.6miliion population every day over 300 dead.Cheers
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That sounds very natural actually. But fear cannot be the focus.

Building trust with life and destiny has given me enormous coping strength.

It's hard as hell still, but I made it 7 days after breaking my back a week after fracturing a hand "with" Flu lol (and legit 14 Month Long Covid).

Just can focus on today and the now though. Don't let the fear dominate.

What will be will. I am preparing.
 
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